AIBU to leave tutor and 9-year-old to work at kitchen table?

[Isanybodyouttherehey]

How does it work for you?

Due to start 9 year old Ds with a tutor to help with his writing. She will come to our home.
I’m thinking they can work on our kitchen table, I will provide a drink, maybe biscuits, have his work and pencil case ready and disappear to give them some quiet?
Does this sound about right?
Do you chat with your tutor or just let them in and leave them to get on with it?
I’m feeling quite anxious as Ds has some behavioural problems.

This is all new to me.

Anyone else have a tutor and what’s your routine?
I want to be welcoming and helpful to her

I don’t but, bumping for you

My DS goes to the tutor's house and we just catch up at the end.
I would just invite in and leave them to it but say you are just next door if she needs.you?
Does she know about the behavioural issues? Maybe ask if she would like you to stay or leave?

Oh thanks, due to start tomorrow

I drop my son at his tutors, come back 50mons later towards end of lesson. We have a quick debrief and head home. He works better if I am not there, so I would offer a drink and head upstairs to leave them in peace x

She does know, but seems quite laid back about it. Definitely think I should probably make myself scarce.
Should I offer refreshments and have his work and learning things out and ready (he’s not very organised to do himself)

Yes they work at our kitchen table. I offer a drink, a quick chat, and then sit in another room with the door open to be on hand if needed. It will go fine I’m sure. With 1:1 input I’ve always been surprised how compliant kids will then be.

Our tutor arrives, quick chit chat and then leave the tutor and my DC to it while I work upstairs for another hour. I come down 2 or 3 mins before the session ends and potter while they finish up

Do most people drop at the tutors home? I know she does offer this and I do feel bad about her driving to us and the petrol. I realise teachers don’t get paid much.

I had a tutor for my DD then. I asked my DD if she wanted me to stick around as she’s shy. She did. So I let tutor know I was going to sit in. DD only wanted me there for the first two sessions, as her and tutor really hit it off. After that, I just let them get on with it.

Editing to add, that my DD’s tutor and piano teacher always came to our home.

Yes have any stationary and books already out and set up. And offer a drink. Sounds like it will be fine 🙂

I had a tutor for 3 years for my then junior age child. She came to the house. Quick chit chat, then left them to it in the dining room whilst I went upstairs and younger brother played in his room for the hour. Son would call me down when done, 3 mins or so of showing the work and pleasantries, and off she went. My son would offer her a drink and a biscuit every week so I left them to it. My son also has behaviour issues (asd and adhd) and on occasion would get cross and start shouting. She dealt with it like a pro (well, she was I suppose 🤣). Occasionally I'd get involved if he stomped off, or it was more than a minor shout.
I miss her. She was fab. But my son started high school and the longer day due to transport (out at 7.20, home at 4.20) meant he could no longer cope with the extra work. He already felt he was losing 3 hours a day of "his time" and refused to add any more to his day 😫

My dc tutor and piano teacher we take to them, so I think both options are common.
I have a busy loud household so suits us all round to take the children there and i think helps them focus more in that specific environment away from home.

Very different age so maybe not helpful but I had a tutor during 6th form and we were just left to it. Think mum got him a coffee and a biscuit at the start.

I worked as a private tutor for many years.
Don’t worry about her coming to you rather than vice versa; that’s completely normal. And working at the kitchen table will be perfect. Offering a drink and some biscuits is always nice. A chat at the start if you want to tell/ explain/ ask anything, and then leave them to it.

My daughter is 9 and has a tutor. But we go to her house and I just leave them to it. It’s been the best thing for her. Her confidence has rocketed.

It sounds absolutely fine OP.

Set up the area - laptop, books, pens.
Leave out two glasses of water.
Make sure your child has been to the bathroom and is ready to work by the arranged time.

Welcome the tutor and show them the working space and where the bathroom is. Then explain that you will be busy doing things around the house and to just call out if they need anything. Leave and close the kitchen door.

lots of great advice on here. I will add just one thing. Don’t hover. It’s so distracting.

Quick hello, pleasantries and share anything the tutor needs to know relevant to the lesson. Then do the “Shall I pop into the living room and let you get on with it?”. She will tell you if she wants you to stay.

Yep this is what I did.

We’ve only ever had tutors come to ours in special circumstances. None of these involved my mother hanging about, she’d only be in the way.

Normally we just went to the tutor’s house and later when I was in uni, to a local café.

Yes, I do think she should put her price up a little due to travel time and petrol

Yes, I thought some tutors might like more than the one biscuit that everyone's stipulated so far 😄

I wouldn't linger, just let the tutor get on with teaching. Maybe a few quick words at the end. Offer a drink, but ours preferred to bring their own bottle.

Two glasses of water? What, no hard tack?

Yeah, I guess one shouldn't spoil the help @Catlady007007

Tutors are usually only there for an hour. A glass of water is fine. They aren’t there to eat. Your child should definitely be ready to work.
@Catlady007007 is 100%.

OP, your plan sounds fine. Be near enough to hear whats going on, particularly in the first class, but not “breathing down their neck”.