AIBU to change daughter’s antibiotics schedule and sleep separately after insult?

[IcyRubyHiker]

Daughter (5) is poorly with tonsillitis. She has antibiotics that she can either take 4 times a day 2.5ml or twice, 5ml.

She hates the taste so wants to take it 4 times with a smaller dose each time. My husband was at home today and made the decision she should take it twice, as it’s more convenient with school etc.

Cue a lot of upset this evening with her taking it.. so I negotiate the 4 times smaller dose which she’s much happier with.

Husband is seemingly raging that I’ve changed the plan and stormed down the stairs calling me a retard… I was so shocked!! (Daughter didn’t hear as he said it half way down the stairs)

I know getting a young child to take medicine is stressful but I don’t think the ‘retard’ insult was warranted, plus it’s just such an offensive word. He has also had to take the last 2 days off work to look after our daughter so he’s probably annoyed about that too…

I’m considering sleeping in the spare room
tonight as I feel pretty disrespected, I just don’t want to talk to him or be near him to be honest. We’ve been unhappy in marriage for a while, and I had to bite my tongue so hard not to just tell him to where to go, but obviously our daughter was there so I just ignored it and carried on with the bedtime routine.

What are peoples thoughts?

I don’t feel able to go and apologise to someone who has called me a retard in an aggressive manner. So no I haven’t apologised to him.

And you have questioned his parenting ability - you’re both as bad as each other

Then you say "sorry, you have to take it to get better, but you can choose whether it's twice or four times." At least, that would work on my 3yo. And sounds like it worked for OP's daughter.

Erm no those 2 things are not the same

I disagree.

Exactly. It’s worked well with the lower dose and I feel good to have given her the choice.

Why do you think you know better than the GP who said 4 doses is an option?

I don't blame you!

Ah you're a misogynist who will always defend men who abuse women. Noted.

You're a good, caring mum. Good luck with your husband. Please do see a relationship counsellor so you can tell someone the truth about all the things he has been doing and saying - because I know this is just the tip of the iceberg.

Good luck.

You deciding quite reasonably to modify the dosing schedule to avoid meltdowns is not in the same ballpark as calling you a retard. To all the posters shaming you, please understand that. It is verbal abuse and I would tell him: never ever speak to me like that again, especially in front of our child.

Yeh it’s not good that he called you a retard . I would talk about it and tell him you felt hurt . I personally wouldn’t sleep in a separate bed over this . Sometimes tensions run high when a child is sick and that’s no excuse for him using that word but I think sleeping in a different bed is OTT without having a calm discussion about it .