Passive aggressive or ?

[BlanketBlues]

Is it a passive aggressive reaction to send a thumbs op as a reply to one holiday picture in Messenger ? Or is it an ok answer? We are in our late forties/early fifties. No other pictures sent.

I send thumbs up for nearly everything. Never thought it passive aggressive

Ok I hope you are right..

👍.
Seems perfectly reasonable to me but I’m 65. If youngsters ascribe negative meanings to innocently meant emojis (or even punctuation!) then tbh that’s their problem.

The trouble is, everyone sees and believes different things. I’m the same age as you (older) and a few years ago was basically ghosted by a good friend with a series of 👍. Well she was trying hard to ghost me and I wouldn’t let her lol so either I got radio silence or I got an occasional 👍 to every message. Even if I asked a question, I got a thumbs up lol…so to me it is considered quite rude. But then sometimes I do a thumbs up if I literally have nothing say or add but still trying to acknowledge that I’ve seen the message, if that makes sense. But most of the time, if I have nothing to say or add, I’ll still try to write something mildly relevant or polite like “nice 😎☀️” to maybe something like a holiday picture.

i guess it’s really debatable where you are in life and how you see emojis. I have a friend who’s quite confrontational and she puts a 🤷‍♀️ after most comments which my other friends find quite rude. You’ve found a 👍 quite rude/dismissive but the sender that might be an everyday emoji

Thank you all of you..

I don't think it's passive aggressive, but I wouldn't use that emoji to respond to a holiday photo. It's a bit dismissive I think. But equally I wouldn't be bothered if someone used it in response to a message I sent.

Depends on context.

It has a reputation I think as being seen as potentially dismissive. Like 'that's great but I'm not interested in communicating with about the subject any further'?! Haha.

I know one person who uses it that way every time I try and text them. But I mean I know he doesn't really like me (family) so it must also by used in a nice normal 'that's great, I agree'. kind of way.

👍

A thumbs up emoji usually indicates agreement, so if the picture was something you had to agree to it’s fine.
It does depend on the context, but as someone in my 30s if I only ever got back a thumbs up in response to pictures or messages I’d sent, I’d stop sending them as I’d view the lack of interaction as disinterest. An infrequent thumbs up wouldn’t bother me and I wouldn’t think it passive aggressive, but if you wanted to convey interest without sending a full message back I’d use a heart emoji instead.

I believe a thumbs up is seen as rude by younger people though I don’t know why.
If someone sent me a holiday pic I’d probably do a heart emoji or sunshine or a wine glass. Something like that.

It’s a bit casual and not particularly warm but it is in no way passive aggressive.

Thumbs up is a positive or an acknowledgement.

I'd probably use ❤️ on a holiday photo as it's a bit more enthusiastic, but I wouldn't see 👍as passive aggressive.

Thumbs up typically means OK/noted/ agreed where there is no need for a more engaged response. It doesn't seem quite right for a holiday photo. I think anyone adding an emoji and wanting to communicate "that's nice" would tend to use the love heart.

"Ok" in response to a holiday snap seems a bit "and so what?" A bit like when a post is started on AIBU saying that their boyfriend dumped them by text and how do they respond. Someone always suggests a thumbs up as a way of saying "I'm fine and not bothered".

So it might be pass agg. Or it might be someone not particularly invested in emojis thinking "oh that's nice, must acknowledge" and using thumbs up as a generic gesture.

You know this person OP. Which do you think it is?

Its not passive aggressive, but it is dismissive & pretty much means "I don't care" in that context. I'd only really use a thumbs up as a response to confirm details of something, like meeting times etc

I wouldn’t go as far as to say it was passive aggressive. It is dismissive though and seems like the person isn’t really interested.

I see it as pretty dismissive. My older family members either send it when agreeing to catch ups which I see as alright but if I or someone else sends a picture and they 👍 then others and myself find it a little cold. I would either react by clicking ❤️ or just say looks good!

I am on holiday with my daughter and sent a picture of us, in front of a statue. And Got the thumbs up. I read it as “whatever” and it had me thinking of what it means.

It kind of does feel a bit ‘whatever’. How was it you sent it to?

A close friend.. i thouht..

Don't over-think it. Enjoy your holiday, don't send any more photos, forget about your friend till you get home. It probably means nothing at all, but if it does, there's nothing to be gained by worrying about it while you're on holiday.

You are right.. thanks 😊

In Facebook messenger? The thumbs up is a default icon but sends without having to enter, and I press it unintentionally all the time.

I think it's fine but the young'uns might view it differently....

I believe the proper response is a heart.
Although I am old and all this is a bit weird to me.
(Apparently using a full stop at the end of your sentence is considered rude/snippy.
who knew?)