AIBU to refuse to change the car battery given my caring duties?

[Kardelen]

how easy is it to change car batteries?
we changed my dads one a few years back, but it was me, my husband and dad.
i remember it being very heavy, and also having a small electric shock midway.

at the moment, I have two young children im caring for, and my elderly parents, and also my husband who is unwell.
so my husband can’t help, it’s out the picture. But my dad also can’t help as he is elderly, chronic pain, breathlessness etc, but is eager for me to buy it and thinks he can do it alone.

he was gonna ask my brother, but as usual very reluctant and im the go to person. But this time I said I can’t do it, but feeling guilty.

am I being unreasonable of not wanting to do it? - only because I remember last time it was 3 of us and we struggled.

Good for you! 🤜🤛

Well if you can do it but just CBA it's laziness. If you can't do it then as the PP states it would be "uselessness"

My laziness kicks in with mowing the lawn I can do it but rather not so get someone else to

I agree on all counts.

My late husband told me that he used to be confident enough to work on his previous cars, but not the more modern ones.

Our last car is a 2017 VW. Even after his stroke, DH was able to talk me through some things - e.g fitting and tightening a chain on a new chainsaw. He told me he wouldn't have a clue about changing the battery in the car, given all the electronic stuff these days.

The RAC chap who came to do it for me apparently had to be careful of various systems and so on.

At one point, I was working full time and looking after three adults. When it came to certain tasks around the house (and car), I figured that I was safer leaving it to someone who knew what they were doing.

I can manage to screw bits of wood together, etc using a power drill and I can manage to use a cordless hedgecutter without causing mayhem.

@Kardelen Well do I remember the stress of trying to deal with everything as well as caring.

Well yes so can I afford to, but I’m not lazy and incompetent so prefer to not throw unnecessary money away for nothing!!

I have 7, I raise them single handily, 2 with disabilities, one severely autistic with development delay who cant be left unattended and also carer for a family member, you don’t need talent to change a car battery, just common sense and 5-10 minutes of your time!! I’ve no idea how the hell it took 3 of you to change it last time. I’m sure you’ve lifted a baby, it’s the same weight so why couldn’t even ONE of you lift a battery? It’s loosening the clamps, taking old battery out, new one in, tighten clamps. That’s it!! You’re making out like you’re so hard done by because you have kids a job and caring responsibilities for others, that’s not the “hard done by” situation you seem to think it is, neither is my situation, simple jobs need done, you’re acting like the whole damn engine needs replaced not just a battery 😂

I know what it’s like, I care for a severely disabled family member along with my own 7 kids all on my own, one in a wheelchair and one with severe ASD and developmentally delayed, I was also carer for 2 grandparents before they died. I change my own car batteries because it’s not brain surgery it’s a 5 minute job, I could pay someone but why waste money on a simple job? Grown adults in here acting like they’re incapable f doing simple tasks just because they care for people and yet they’d be the very ones complaining about “kids of today” 😏

It takes them 5 minutes because that's how long it takes. I did mine the other day, I do it about once every 5 years. Still takes me 5 minutes.

I'm not saying it's unreasonable for the OP to take it somewhere and get someone else to do it if she's busy and not confident, just that it's not really something that gets massively faster the more you do it, it's just undoing and redoing a few bolts.

It is easy to fit but the computer will need resetting so best to get a garage to do it.

Sorry I'm late to this party...

Car batteries have got more efficient and lighter in general, so it might not be that it's not heavy. It will only fit one way around and hence you couldn't connect it up wrong. Plus although you may get some sparks as you connect the second lead, the 12V won't give you a dangerous shock.

However, if your car has stop - start you'll have a beefier battery. If it's a hybrid again it has a much heavier battery. If it's PHEV I wouldn't mess with it as some have quite dangerous voltages on the second (hybrid) battery.

The other complications is some cars need a security code for the entertainment system after the battery has been disconnected.

So the answer is it depends.

I'm not sure why you think EVERYONE has fancy conputerised new cars. On the roads there are everything from 02 plate fiestas to brand new jags. Bearing in mind the original battery should last 3 years or more at minimum then I'd say a greater percentage of cars that need battery changes shouldn't be needing " reprogramming"

By earning enough money to outsource stuff like this to other people!

All women are high earners? Really? Maybe tell that to all shop workers, care workers and hospitality staff then