To ask reception parents how may parties they’ve been to?

[rainyetagainonasunday]

We have only been to two from reception. It’s a fairly small class (only fifteen children.)

Is this common? I see a lot of people saying they are at parties most weekends but that doesn’t seem to be the case here.

Two from fifteen kids sounds a really normal proportion. Most people talking about lots of parties probably have kids in classes of 30.

Class of 14 and we’ve had 13 parties with one more to come next week. The school do their classes (roughly) on age so this is the class of the eldests and the youngest child is a March birthday.

I think 2 isn’t very many. You’d expect that slightly over half the kids would have had their birthdays by now given it’s just over half way through the academic year and there’s often a skew which means you get more Septembers/Octobers. So probably 8 ish of the 15 have had their birthdays but only 2 parties. I know not everyone does them but I’d expect a few more than that.

Mine didn't go to every party they were invited to...maybe one a month. It encroached too much on family time and a party every week took away the "special" aspect.
And we only had small at home parties...maximum 5 guests.

It’s three thinking about it -
forgot one. And my own ds has had a party so I suppose it is four in total.

Thirteen is loads - other friends I have with children in different schools are like that, they are at parties just about every weekend. Was hoping we aren’t pariahs

My Ds is year 1 and has had 4 parties this year but what I've noticed is that there were far more all class parties in dd's early years.the parties that ds goes to are often not all class and that only happened in year 3 for DD.

I think cost of living means people are cutting down the parties and invite lists.

DD was in covid at the time so no parties ..in year 1 there was three out of 50 children (two classes) and year 2 around 5. Since then it's only close friends And tbh it was more around 6. This year no parties as everyone is struggling financially....dd will be going to a cinema with one of two friends this year.

A significant number of ethnic minority families we know invite their community not their kids school friends and it’s as much a party for the adults, only relevant if you are in a non white area. Our son got invited to 0 (his reception year included covid) and was one of the reasons we moved him, now many more friends.

It's only on MN I have ever seen it mentioned about reception being constant parties. Even when my son was in reception, before COVID hit, he only went to one party and then hosted his own. There would have been a term and a half before everything stopped. There were other children who had birthdays (known from group chats and also some parents sent in sweets to hand out) but there definitely wasn't the whole class party thing going on.

They are really expensive. I’m a bit different to a PP and I actually like children’s parties; my ds gets fed and gets to play with his friends for a couple of hours, it’s a great way to break up the weekend!

I remember they came in stages. Sometimes lots, sometimes none.

I'd say that's a normal amount. You may not got an invite to all parties and its a small class group. Assuming you may not have another reception class either? Most schools a have 2 classes and sometimes there's crossover invites if they're friends from nursery/clubs. I think it would be weird to ask others how many they've been to. Not everyone has a party either.

@Moonnstarz i have friends with children at different schools who seem to go to a lot more parties, but to be far they are probably in bigger classes. I know a few children have had birthdays and no party, or if they have had a party we weren’t invited!

Why not organise playdates then? You could arrange them at soft play or even try and get a group together to do an activity and split the cost if it's more than you like the social side and seeing friends at weekends.

Class of similar size and we've had 3 so far. I know of 2/3 children that didn't have a party and now the invites are coming in for the spring/summer and there are loads so think it's just a year group with a lot of summer born children.

I think there's often a trend. If some children start having big parties, others often want to do the same. If it's less of a 'thing', some parents will steer their children away from big parties, especially with costs going up.

You also don't know how birthdays fall in the class. DS is in a class of 30 and weirdly there is 1 child with a Sept birthday and none with a Oct/Nov birthday. We then had a run of invites in Jan-Mar, having not really had any parties. (This was 2 years ago now, he is year 2 now and less parties.)

That sounds like about the same number as we did. We never did a party every weekend, I briefly worried about it but then realised I didn’t want to go to party every weekend! Eldest is in year 6 and actually this feels like a busy party year he’s had 1 and been invited to 4 others so far (one was an out of school sport friend) that’s more than enough. He has lots of friends and a busy life. I don’t think all families do a big party these days (they are seriously expensive, we’ve only done one every couple of years) and naturally small parties don’t have every kid invited.

I may do @Moonnstarz ; was just wondering really.

@Cantgetausername87 were you replying to someone else? I don’t ask anyone how may they’ve been to, it just comes up in group chats ‘what’s everyone up to …‘Olivia is at a party … look at this picture of harry in a superhero outfit for his friends party’ kind of thing.

seem to be loads of Christmas birthdays @Ifitsgoodenoughforyou … what were we all doing march 2020

I think your example is less the norm, 13 out of 14 with one more to come is 100% of the class having a party.

Our son is in a class of 30 and another reception class of 30 in the same school.

He's been to 3/4 since September and has 3 more booked in until May.

We didn’t throw one for his 5th but he will have one for his 6th.

@BendingSpoons You also don't know how birthdays fall in the class

I do in fact … the months of the year are displayed in the class with the child’s name on them

I don’t mind, there is no criticism. I was just wondering as our experience seems a bit different to others’. To be fair we’ve been to a lot more parties than that, just that only three have been school (four if you include DS’s party.)

Also do you live near places that host parties? We live in an area with 6-7 soft plays, trampoline parks, inflatable places that are very easy. If you are just near one village hall then maybe parents don't want the hassle of hiring it, cleaning it etc.

There are a significant amount of ethnic minority families at our school so i’ve also been wondering about this as a reason for lack of parties.

DS has been invited to 1 party. 26 kids in his class. But that party was for a kid in a different class who he went to nursery with.

Having said that, we didn’t have a party for DS either. Early Oct bday. We will for year 1 though.

That probably is a factor @Monsterslam . I have to admit I don’t book the local soft play for either of my children’s parties as we’ve been to so many parties there it’s kind of lost the special feeling!

That’s interesting re the minorities. DS’s school is actually almost 100% white British but I can see this as a factor.

Good point, I should have said 'do you know how the birthdays fall?' as we also had birthday months on the wall in Reception, hence how I knew!

Think we’ve had 7 so far this year, but she’s in a class of 26.

We tend to have gluts, so had four in a row in Feb, only one in March but I remember a lot in July for school nursery.

Think if there aren’t many parties kids are less likely to ask for one. I’m only doing one for our DD this year because I assumed she didn’t want one last year but as so many others had one, she wanted one. But this will be it for big parties, we will move to friends or smaller groups as the years go on.