Parents filming in children’s groups

[Curious4567]

I don’t know if I am overreacting, but my gut tells me I’m not. I take my 2 year old to a gymnastics class once a week, which he loves. While we are there, there is always at least 3 or 4 parents that insist on filming their children. Now I understand people want to have memories of their children, so do I, but I am very against people having videos or pictures with my child in the image also, regardless if it is only in the background (I would only take pictures of my child alone or with consent) I don’t post pictures of my child online, I personally don’t agree with it, one they haven’t consented, two, they will go on to be independent and don’t deserve to have an online history following them, and three, you don’t know who is looking at them or god forbid, doing god knows what with them!
anyway, I’m thinking of raising it with the club but wanted to get others opinions first!
fire away…
thanks!

I think that ship has sailed for the most part. Having said that, my kid's gymnastics club has a no photography rule, but it isn't enforced unless you aren't diligent to only get your own kid in your shot.

Doesn’t the club have a rule about this?

At my grandchildren's junior school the head teacher asks parents to only take photos of your own child and to not post online, at every event. There's still no guarantee anyone will take any notice of her instructions and to me it should be banned completely. Taking a picture of your child with their certificate/award etc at home to remember the day seems much better.

No you’re absolutely right OP, I’d have demanded they stop especially as your child is in a bloody leotard!
Also, I agree about posting kids online. If only more parents understood what can happen if pictures of their children got into the wrong hands!

The club should have a rule about this, it's not just about you not wanting photos or videos taken of your child it can be a serious safe guarding issue for looked after children and children in care.

I'd remind them they having a safeguarding responsibility as a club which children attend.

As for the school issue, our kids primary always reminded parents that if images did show up on social media they would ban parents from taking any photos. This did seem to keep everyone in line.

Two year olds aren’t in leotards at any of our local gymnastics clubs, unless they’re competing. The regular lessons are in shorts or leggings and a club T-shirt.

I’m on the fence. I’ve done it once or twice and only video my son and didn’t and wouldn’t post them online but I do think it’s nice to be able to show him his progress. Plus you’d never be confident nobody was filming, there’s glasses with inbuilt cameras, etc.

Have you seen any of the footage online or are you just worried people will post it there?

The children in care argument is an odd one to me. I was a child in care so none of my photos or anything could be shared, so they weren’t taken. That means I’m an adult with one photo of myself between birth and 19. That’s quite sad. I wish there was more of me growing up.

You’ll have the memories, sure, but they can’t be passed down the same, especially if you’re not alive. I’d love to know if I had the same gymnastic ability that my son has. I’d love to know what I enjoyed or was good at.

There’s absolute validity in not wanting anything to end up online, and the risks that can cause, but there’s a sad side to not allowing any photos at all.

That said, I think the club will likely issue a reminder if you raise it to them. Most places do have rules against it. One of the clubs near me no longer allow parents to watch lessons as some people ignored the no photography/filming rule.

My child's gymnastics (which is a proper gym I suppose, with national level gymnasts as opposed to a sports centre or village hall class) has a strict no photography rule and you lose your membership if you violate it. Agree you should be able to take your child to a class without them being filmed if you don't want them to be.

What about school performances? Our school always says take as many photos or
videos as you like but please don’t share them to social media. Surely the same would
apply at gymnastics? I post my own children on social media but would never post someone else’s without permission, even in the background, unless they were unidentifiable (from behind etc.) and that’s with private accounts. I would ask the club to remind people that if they are going to take pictures they are not to be shared online. I also wouldn’t assume that’s what they are doing with them as I have a million pictures of my children and a handful
online.

Club should have a rule on this as everyone I've been too has. Something to raise with the person in charge

Are they actually getting your child in the background? I go to a few groups with DD and no one has ever mentioned not taking photos (if anything it is encouraged to raise the profiles.)

I’ll echo the responses about the club should have a policy in place about photography - you should ask for it.

I get the concerns, especially where things are shared widely on social media, but I get fed up of it appearing like my child has no friends, no birthday party, and is always alone.

I feel like I can't take photos of my child these days without somehow engineering it to look like they're the only child doing any form of activity.

I run the Instagram page for my sons football teams.

all parents have to be asked if they want their child picture on social media. However they don’t need to be asked permission to be filmed/photos as long as they are for your own personal use.

I film my son at boxing so he can’t watch it back and know what his coach is talking about with what he needs to improve, he is a visual learning so being able to pause a video and explain what his coach meant about stance etc is best for him. (He’s 5)

To be honest, no one should have to justify why they take photos of their child - I take them purely for my own pleasure. I do try not to include anyone in the background but children this age move swiftly and suddenly so it does happen.

My dcs go to a council-run gymnastics club and photography and filming is banned there, same with council children's centres and some other council services. But most privately-run classes allow photos and videos. Personally I always respect rules about photography, but if it's not explicitly banned then I do it. I love being able to look back on photos and videos, and to be able to share them with family. I don't post on SM at all. I don't make a big effort not to include other dcs tbh, it's just awkward and impractical when dcs are moving around and I don't mind if my dc gets in shot of someone else's photos/videos, it just happens.

The club needs to have a policy in place. If they don't, then I don't like it either but accept it's just part of being in public places, or part of communal activities. I cringe and suck it up.

Thankfully attitudes seem to have changed and it is actively encouraged for carers to build up memory boxes including photographs throughout the child's time in care. My own children have so many photographs of their life before me, as well as keepsakes from important events and milestones. X
Unfortunately, I am very wary of their photos being captured in public settings as it could put them in danger. This is something we just have to live with. I don't expect other people to fully understand or appreciate my fear of them being located but I do get annoyed when parents are specifically asked not to take pictures and do it anyway.

I'm sorry about that-I hadn't realised the rule applied until scoial media began, as one of my friends was in care and I don't think anyone stopped us taking pictures of her; this was early noughties so social media didn't exist, and I'd thought the rule about taking photos only came in then. You might be younger than us though, and while I understand the safety aspect, and never post my kids in photos online, I think it must be hard not to have any photos.

It's such a shame that we as parents feel threatened by what used to be perfectly normal, well in those days it was just taking photos with a camera.

As a teacher taking students students on trips, we would just completely innocently take photos in the splash park, they all stood there in groups smiling/with us as well, coming down slides etc, the same as in theme parks, restaurants, random photos.

It's how the world changed, as with most things, the behaviour and risk of the few who impact for everyone. So many safeguarding measures due to the possibility of a small amount of people who could be paedophile, which is of course the utmost importance to protect all children.

A very good friend who I went to university with, who is a realm dealing with exploited material, informed me a lot of it actually comes form SM posts. Sharing photos and videos makes everyone more vulnerable more so than schools with strict regulations.

Is that likely to come from a blurry background shot of a child though? I’m genuinely asking there - anyone wanting to get photos of children could do so fairly easily at any park or beach, unfortunately.

I struggle to understand the need to film and photograph every single event you attend. Why if you have paid to attend a concert, sports event would you feel the need to spend the whole time with your phone in the air. Just enjoy the event.

I have one particular friend who likes to take photos if we are at lunch. I always say I do not want my picture taken nor do I want it posted on her FB.

We should not be accepting of this excessive filming as being the ‘norm’ and should challenge people if you are not happy with it.

Challenge your child’s gym class, challenge parents who you think are taking photos of your child. I don’t think this obsession will disappear but if you don’t like it do your best to
do Something about it.

If anyone ‘challenged’ me for taking a photograph of my own child I’d tell them to mind their own.

Any club or performance that parents are allowed at has parents filming and taking pictures. Usually with a reminder not to share it online, but no rules about not doing it at all. Anyone can take pictures or videos of children outside at any time so I try not to get too worried about this. Certainly different to make your child pose for photos and put them online, and aware some children have challenging family situations so need to avoid this, but otherwise the world is filled with cameras and there’s not much you can do about it. There are photos of my kids of them at their taekwando comps, dance comps, etc etc. and I’m sure they’re in endless backgrounds at playparks or whatever.

And if you’d done that in the swimming pool setting where I’m in charge, I’d be escorting you out to the foyer and you wouldn’t be coming back.