AIBU after rushing out to get party balloons while the dad stayed home watching football?

[FunkyDancer223]

My DC went to a friend’s birthday party recently. Earlier in the morning I bumped into the mum and she mentioned she was still running around trying to sort a few things before the party that afternoon. She said she still needed to pick up some balloons and asked if I could get some.

I said yes because going by the conversation it was inferred they were for the party we were about to go to. She told me the type she wanted, the big helium ones, so while my DC was busy with something else that morning I went to the shops and bought them. They came to about £20.

I then picked my DC up and we went straight to the party with the balloons.

When I arrived the mum told me to hide them because her DC wasn’t meant to see them. I was confused and she then said they were actually for her DC's birthday the next day, not the party we were currently at.

So I’d basically rushed around doing an errand that wasn’t even for the party I was heading to.

During the party I asked what time her husband was arriving and she said he was at home watching the football. That surprised me as well given it was their DC’s birthday party, and it also made me wonder why he couldn’t have just popped out to get the balloons himself rather than me rushing around beforehand.

Anyway I gave her the receipt and she said she’d transfer the money. I sent my bank details later that evening and she replied a couple of days later saying she’d missed the message and would send it over.

It’s now several days later and nothing has come through.

I don’t really want to chase £20 but equally it’s the principle. I feel like I did her a favour, rushed around to help her out which her husband could have easily done, and now I’m out of pocket.

AIBU to feel annoyed about it?

I’m the big football fan in the house and DH would have no problems going for stuff when I’m watching a game. He’s done it many times

Someone asked you to do her a favour-you did her a favour. That’s where that bit ends-nothing to do with what her husband or anyone else was doing.

The money is an entirely separate issue. Send her a reminder-with details of how to pay you. And send it again every 2 days. Don’t bring in anything else-that’s not relevant. “Please send me £20 for the balloons. Details here.”

What an odd thing to say. If I attended a party that only one parent was hosting (bar the obvious reasons-deployment, divorce etc) I would absolutely judge the absent parent!
Re AIBU you aren’t BU about any of it. He seems a useless fucker, it is slightly her fault as she allows it and she’s a CF for not paying you back ASAP.

She did not need balloons.
I would pick them up if already paid for as a favour. Not to go pay.
How did it end with you buying balloons for her?
Anyway dont do anything financial for her again

@FunkyDancer223 “Hi, just a reminder to pay the £20 please” and yes her husband could have helped but maybe he just doesn’t. Main thing is not to feel bad asking for the money!

said she still needed to pick up some balloons and asked if I could get some.

"Get some" = buy some
Did she say at that point would refund ?

I'd be more worried about the money than the husband.

He's not the first lazy arsed bastard to leave everything to his wife.

And she's not the first mug to let him do it.

If she was a MNetter, I expect her reasoning would be 'He works long hours'.

I'd be pissed off about the husband, why are you being asked to do the running around so that the child's parent can sit on his arse watching TV?! Of course it's to do with him, its HIS child!

I'd be even more annoyed about the money. Don't hold back, text her and ask her to transfer it.

But you chose to do this

Well I offered to help out based on her inferring that the balloons were for the party that was starting in a couple of hours not that I was being asked to just run general errands for her when either she or the husband could have done themselves either after the party - or rather than him watching the football.

Next time, don't get involved. It sounds like all the women are "running around" and all the men are doing what men do, sitting on the sofa being useless.

As an aside ...
if a non-friend, or even a friend, or a relative, asks you to buy helium balloons, tell them in no uncertain terms that you're not buying anything helium-filled as it's a non-renewable resource needed for hospital medical equipment. If they think youre being an arse, then that's an even better outcome.

So a further update... I sent a reminder for the money after it being outstanding for a week. A day later I got a reply saying sorry it was left to the husband to do and he will do it later that evening - it is now 3 days later and still no funds. On top of that she had the cheek to ask if I could give her DC a lift at the weekend. She is 100% a CF!

Keep asking.

“Sure, the cost of a lift is £20” (joking obviously but keep asking!)

Well feck that for a game of fecking soldiers. Ask her if her husband has suffered a stroke or is incapacitated. Frame it as concern.

Three days later!! I’d be asking every day. I have no qualms these days about being blunt and asking for money back after being too polite in the past and ending up out of pocket

edited to add I’d also be telling anyone who knows them how they haven’t paid you back. Let that one bounce around at the school gates.

Ask for cash when you pick up child

or say can’t pick up as have not enough petrol to detour to theirs till she pays back the £20 😂

Did you get paid? How embarrassing for them if you have to ask a third time, but really not ok.

Have they paid you back yet????????