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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Ah you're a Catholic!

435 replies

Appleday11 · 24/02/2026 19:50

I moved to England to work last year. I'm Irish.

When I arrived at my workplace, one of my colleagues said "Ah you are Irish, this is a nice city, there is a Catholic church down the road that you can go to".

I think she was trying to be helpful but I thought it was quite bizarre. I'm not Catholic and I told her so.

Second time - I was out in the pub with a mixed group of people. Some of them I had never met before. One man said "ah you're Irish, you're a Catholic!" I told him Im not.

Third time- I was at another group. A woman said to me "you are Irish. Ah so you like such and such. And you are a Catholic". I told her I am not.

I found it strange as I have never really thought about religiom. Do some people here think that all Irish people are Catholics? My family were not religious at all and I was never brought up any religion

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Catlady007007 · 25/02/2026 01:50

I don't really understand why you appear to be taking it as an insult. That is how it reads to me, though perhaps that is unintentional on your part.

I think that many English people still have the belief that England is somehow superior to other countries - Ireland included. Probably due to being a colonial empire in the past. And with so much multiculturism, and the disaster of Brexit, there is a loss of identity so people live in the past. Thats my tuppence worth anyway.

DeepRubySwan · 25/02/2026 01:52

I'm Australian from an Irish background and I would probably assume you are Catholic tbh sorry about that. I don't know any Irish immigrants to Australia that aren't Catholic and I know a lot because the area I live in is strongly Catholic, therefore we attract a lot of Irish!

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 01:53

Catlady007007 · 25/02/2026 01:50

I don't really understand why you appear to be taking it as an insult. That is how it reads to me, though perhaps that is unintentional on your part.

I think that many English people still have the belief that England is somehow superior to other countries - Ireland included. Probably due to being a colonial empire in the past. And with so much multiculturism, and the disaster of Brexit, there is a loss of identity so people live in the past. Thats my tuppence worth anyway.

Do some English people still think that they are superior? Thats sad.

I suppose those kind of people can't feel superior unless they decide that a neighbouring country is stupid.

I was talking to an English man once abut Ireland and England. He was about 55. He told me that he was taught from a young age that Irish people were stupid, and English people were superior.

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mathanxiety · 25/02/2026 01:55

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 01:38

I am really surprised that you still receive abuse for being Irish in the UK. I'm not trying to be facetious but many people will be too ignorant or young to know of the troubles between England and Ireland. I have an Irish married surname but nobody ever mentions it or thinks anything of it.

The 'troubles between England and Ireland' are not really relevant to the core assumptions people have about the Irish.

The attitudes that cause British people to.look down their noses at the Irish originate far, far deeper than recent history.. They are rooted in religious and cultural history that few Britons are aware of.

The attitudes can be traced in the pages of 19th Century issues of Punch magazine, where the Irish were relentlessly portrayed as simian creatures, lazy, feckless, uncouth, and Catholic.

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 01:58

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 01:48

Racism is not just to do with skin colour, it is to do with ethnicity.

I pointed out that the only place I have reveived abuse for being Irish is in Emgland.

The Irish are well liked everywhere else so it can be a bit of a shock to come to England and experience abuse. It obviously stems from the history between England +Ireland.

Edited

Why would the Irish not be liked in different countries, there is no historical conflict. Having said that, I am still shocked that in this day and age people are still knowledgeable enough to maintain such prejudices.

The British aren't all perceived in the way the Irish perceive them, certainly not where I have family in Scandinavian countries they quite like the British, their sense of humour, music even getting tipsy but again it is hard to tell what nations think of you unless you speak all of these languages.

Bones101 · 25/02/2026 02:00

Studied in London for a while and had patients call me the Catholic and Paddy. It was so bad.

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:02

mathanxiety · 25/02/2026 01:55

The 'troubles between England and Ireland' are not really relevant to the core assumptions people have about the Irish.

The attitudes that cause British people to.look down their noses at the Irish originate far, far deeper than recent history.. They are rooted in religious and cultural history that few Britons are aware of.

The attitudes can be traced in the pages of 19th Century issues of Punch magazine, where the Irish were relentlessly portrayed as simian creatures, lazy, feckless, uncouth, and Catholic.

Well yes but that's my point the diverse make up of Britain means that these perceived attitudes are just not in existence for many Brits anymore, the are probably too young to know, are completely ignorant to the history and the history isn't theirs if they have diverse heritage!

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:02

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 01:58

Why would the Irish not be liked in different countries, there is no historical conflict. Having said that, I am still shocked that in this day and age people are still knowledgeable enough to maintain such prejudices.

The British aren't all perceived in the way the Irish perceive them, certainly not where I have family in Scandinavian countries they quite like the British, their sense of humour, music even getting tipsy but again it is hard to tell what nations think of you unless you speak all of these languages.

But didnt you write that you are very surprised that any Irish people would receive abuse in England,

even after our historial conflict?

I said that the abuse I receive in England is definitely due to the Historical conflict. I pointed out that I revceive no abuse in countries where there has been no conflict. I only ever receive abuse in England.

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Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:04

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:02

Well yes but that's my point the diverse make up of Britain means that these perceived attitudes are just not in existence for many Brits anymore, the are probably too young to know, are completely ignorant to the history and the history isn't theirs if they have diverse heritage!

As an Irish person who has experienced abuse recently in England. I can tell you that these attitudes definitely stil exist in England. Maybe listen to the people who are experiencing the abuse?

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Carla786 · 25/02/2026 02:05

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:02

Well yes but that's my point the diverse make up of Britain means that these perceived attitudes are just not in existence for many Brits anymore, the are probably too young to know, are completely ignorant to the history and the history isn't theirs if they have diverse heritage!

This is an important point. I am doing history at uni right now, and I went to a good school. But we learnt nothing at GCSE & A Level History, or before that, about Irish history, even recent events which majorly impacted Britain too. We didn't learn much about Britain post-1930s either. The focus was very much on global events, WW2 and Cold War.

It's tricky but as the UK it's really sad there's not enough education about Scotland, Wales or Ireland.

Catlady007007 · 25/02/2026 02:05

The UK are quite hostile towards the French too.
It isn't just reserved for the Irish.

Ultimately you have chosen to live in a country where this is not uncommon. You aren't going to educate a nation so you have to either accept it or remain bemused by it.

Carla786 · 25/02/2026 02:07

Catlady007007 · 25/02/2026 02:05

The UK are quite hostile towards the French too.
It isn't just reserved for the Irish.

Ultimately you have chosen to live in a country where this is not uncommon. You aren't going to educate a nation so you have to either accept it or remain bemused by it.

I don't think a French person would meet abuse in the same way, or less likely to. Largely because the Napoleonic Wars were back in the 1810s and even then, France, was a feared adversary rather than a dehumanised colonial subject.

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:07

Catlady007007 · 25/02/2026 02:05

The UK are quite hostile towards the French too.
It isn't just reserved for the Irish.

Ultimately you have chosen to live in a country where this is not uncommon. You aren't going to educate a nation so you have to either accept it or remain bemused by it.

Weird attititude. I don't have to accept abuse actually.

Rscism and ignorance is changed by people standing up against it. Do you ever stand up against racism?

I saw an Asian woman being racially abused once. I intervened and told them to stop

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Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:11

Catlady007007 · 25/02/2026 02:05

The UK are quite hostile towards the French too.
It isn't just reserved for the Irish.

Ultimately you have chosen to live in a country where this is not uncommon. You aren't going to educate a nation so you have to either accept it or remain bemused by it.

I think that is a mutual exchange. Is it that bad still.

It just isn't the case that the British are perceived in this way by all of Europe. I have family and friends from most Northern European countries and it just isn't the perception at all - sorry to disappoint!

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:12

Catlady007007 · 25/02/2026 02:05

The UK are quite hostile towards the French too.
It isn't just reserved for the Irish.

Ultimately you have chosen to live in a country where this is not uncommon. You aren't going to educate a nation so you have to either accept it or remain bemused by it.

Instead of me "accepting it", maybe the racists could be taught to change. They meed anti racism classes in schools here.

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Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:13

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:11

I think that is a mutual exchange. Is it that bad still.

It just isn't the case that the British are perceived in this way by all of Europe. I have family and friends from most Northern European countries and it just isn't the perception at all - sorry to disappoint!

Have those family and friends from North Europe ever lived in the UK?

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Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:18

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:02

But didnt you write that you are very surprised that any Irish people would receive abuse in England,

even after our historial conflict?

I said that the abuse I receive in England is definitely due to the Historical conflict. I pointed out that I revceive no abuse in countries where there has been no conflict. I only ever receive abuse in England.

Yes, I am surprised but I obviously don't live in the kind of areas where people are shocked to hear a different accent or to live amongst people that look and sound the same as me.

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:18

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:13

Have those family and friends from North Europe ever lived in the UK?

Yes, three currently. Why?

Catlady007007 · 25/02/2026 02:19

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:11

I think that is a mutual exchange. Is it that bad still.

It just isn't the case that the British are perceived in this way by all of Europe. I have family and friends from most Northern European countries and it just isn't the perception at all - sorry to disappoint!

Yes mutual in France. The perception of the UK is not high in Spain, Germany, France - obviously Brexit has not helped.

According to Ipsos.
The UK achieves the lowest rank for attractiveness among young people in Ireland (twelfth), and highest in Kenya, Nigeria, Saudi Arabia, South Africa and Ukraine, where it ranks in first place.

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:21

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:12

Instead of me "accepting it", maybe the racists could be taught to change. They meed anti racism classes in schools here.

Kids have anti racism classes. So you live in an area of England were English kids know enough about Irish history to be racist towards you?

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:23

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:21

Kids have anti racism classes. So you live in an area of England were English kids know enough about Irish history to be racist towards you?

You are not following.

As I've already written, it was never young people who abused me in England, it was always older people.

Old people exist in England you know, why are you constantly focusing on young people.

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Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:27

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:21

Kids have anti racism classes. So you live in an area of England were English kids know enough about Irish history to be racist towards you?

Its actually weird and ignorant of you thst you keep writing that i couldnt possibly have experienced abuse in England.

My muslim colleague told me that he is regulary told to fu.ck off home in England.he was spat at last week.

I wouldnt be so ignorant as t[ say to him

"some kids attend anti racism classes in England, so that couldn't possibly have happened to you"

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Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:27

Catlady007007 · 25/02/2026 02:19

Yes mutual in France. The perception of the UK is not high in Spain, Germany, France - obviously Brexit has not helped.

According to Ipsos.
The UK achieves the lowest rank for attractiveness among young people in Ireland (twelfth), and highest in Kenya, Nigeria, Saudi Arabia, South Africa and Ukraine, where it ranks in first place.

Edited

How do you know? To me this completely alien, I work with all different nationalities, including Spanish, Germans, Swedish, Dutch, we have world food days, we go to the pub together. I have family and friends from all of the Scandinavian countries, I just don't see this hostility at all, it reads like hyperbolic gutter press headlines, that like to whip up division, for what end, well who knows.

It's not really a surprise that people don't want to come to the UK, there isn't exactly a bouyant economy at the moment!

GarlicBound · 25/02/2026 02:29

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 01:45

Yeah I remember when I was in Ireland it was more Catholic than it is now. My mother decided to not make me Catholic. Actually now i think of it, my mother asked me at age 7 if i wanted to be Catholic. She asked me because some of my classmates at that age were making their Catholic communion at age 7. I could have beem christened and then communed at that age.

I said no. My teachers didnt care that I said no. My Local church didnt care. We had freedom to choose.

There was definitely a bit societal pressure to be Catholic just to fit in. But we did have freedom to choose.

Edited

Even so, you seem to have a livelier interest in religion than most English do. You've mentioned four or five people you know, maybe more, with the religion of their families and whether they were baptised or raised without religion.

I have zero clue about the religious backgrounds or affiliations of anybody I know in real life, with the exception of a few observant Jews and one Muslim (because she was fasting when we met).

Appleday11 · 25/02/2026 02:29

Goldenbear · 25/02/2026 02:27

How do you know? To me this completely alien, I work with all different nationalities, including Spanish, Germans, Swedish, Dutch, we have world food days, we go to the pub together. I have family and friends from all of the Scandinavian countries, I just don't see this hostility at all, it reads like hyperbolic gutter press headlines, that like to whip up division, for what end, well who knows.

It's not really a surprise that people don't want to come to the UK, there isn't exactly a bouyant economy at the moment!

How can racism in England possibly be alien to you. Look it up.online.

A quicl google search will show you a huge amount of racist incidents that happened in the Uk. It will also show you a huge amount of marches against immigrants coming to the UK.

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