To have said this to my cleaner?

[wellwatnow]

NC for this. I've had this last cleaner for almost a year, I've had several over the years and although this one isn't all that great she's one of the best at cleaning and I will say is by far the most reliable. She comes every other Monday and sometimes I have to text her on a Sunday afternoon to tell her I won't be in as she has to use the key safe (usually I am home).

I wasn't home last time she came, and I won't be home tomorrow either. As always I thanked her for doing a good job, she's always said I must let her know if anything is missed out with her cleaning, so I asked her if she could make sure my laundry room gets a good clean as she forgot to do it last time.

Anyway, a while later she replied and said no problem, sorry if you thought the laundry room hadn't been cleaned, she said she had cleaned it but would give it a good clean. I replied to thank her and said I'd noticed that one of the wall cupboard doors had definitely not been cleaned which made me think she'd forgotten the room. Well she replied quite quickly by saying she knows which door I mean, and that she hadn't cleaned it because it looked like it was covered in dried cat sick (my cat often sleeps on the top of the wall cupboards in the laundry room) and that she didn't want to clean it, and that I must have known about it because otherwise how did I know it hadn't happened after she left? She said she left it as she didn't want to clean it up and thought it could be the thing we never spoke about, whatever that means. She then said she can't make tomorrow but would be in touch when she's free.

I suspect now that she won't be coming back, which is infuriating as it's impossible to get people to clean, all my friends that have cleaners tell me they are too busy and won't give me their numbers. I only found this one as she was cleaning for a neighbour one day. I had to wait ages for her to find a space to fit me in. But I can't help think she's taking this way too personally.

Me too! Would commas have helped? "I used to clean, donkey's years ago, "

I was a self employed cleaner when my boys were small, a couple of things that stand out from your post.
Cleaners usually charge per job not per hour, one flat I did would take me 2 hours to do everything but I charged it out as a job, not hours because sometimes it was a little messier etc so would take slightly longer. Once people get used to paying per hour they then don’t want to pay more if it’s taken you slightly longer, which is why per job is usual.
You should have stopped messaging when she replied that she had cleaned it but that she would give it a good clean the next day. Your reply should have been ‘thank you’ not that you thought she had forgotten because of the sick/dirt on the cupboard.
Your cleaner thinks you deliberately left cat sick on the cupboard for her to clean because you didn’t want to do it yourself, only you know if this is true!
As a cleaner I would have put gloves on and cleaned it as I would have assumed the cat had been sick after you had left, and things like that don’t really bother me. However I can totally understand why she didn’t because cleaning up animal bodily fluids isn’t part of her role.
You’ve gone through quite a few cleaners in a relatively short space of time, I worked for around 5 years for the same people and only gave up when my middle child went to school because I worked back in my original field. I would really have a think as to why this might be the case, I suspect it’s how you communicate with people based on the text conversation.

The OP is getting a hard time here. She paid someone to do a job. They didn't like her feedback and have flounced off. Not v professional. Mumsnet is very weird about people you employ to do jobs in your home. You're supposed to soend all day making tea and sandwiches for them and praising them to the hilt. Whereas if you work in an office then you shouldn't expect any leeway whatsoever.

I thought it was cleaning out donkeys’ stables too!!!

Many of the cleaners know each other, i think you will find yourself blacklisted. Looks like you are doing your own cleaning from now on.

There’s things no one expects you to do when in the office, just like things you know are not part of general cleaning.
Cat sick falls under the category of biohazard waste, requiring special precautions and equipment. Simple as that. If op didn’t know - now she does, and she can apologise for not realising and fix this.

However, as said before there must be other things the cleaner is not comfortable with, for her to let the job go. And that is absolutely her right and not unprofessional as such.

ETA: in reply to @magnificentkittehQuoting didn’t work for some reason.

this. I've had this last cleaner for almost a year, I've had several over the years and although this one isn't all that great she's one of the best at cleaning and I will say is by far the most reliable.

Wtf do u want? You say she's not all that great,but best at cleaning and the most reliable.
What actually do u want, these 2 qualities are about the top and bottom hiring a cleaner!
I clean and I definitely wouldn't go back if you spoke to me like that! And I. Wouldn't be cleaning your cats sick up

What it means is she is a domestic cleaner that expects to clean up everyday domestic dust and dirt, but doesn't extend this to cleaning vomit from cupboards. And that in her mind, a reasonable employer wouldn't expect her to and would deal with that themselves. And that when you didn't she spared your blushes by not mentioning that (in her mind) you left something disgusting as an oversight, so is surprised at you bringing it up. You may disagree with her perspective, but this is what she will have meant.
If you want her back you will need to contact her and acknowledge the lack of shared expectation when it comes to cat vomit and agree what happens with this going forward. Which will no doubt be you clean it up yourself.

"One of the wall cupboard doors?" You mean the upper ones? How on earth did the cat manage to vomit that high up?

You knew it was cat sick, and you left it. One of my cats is a gross spewer and you can always tell when it's cat sick. If my cat regularly slept on top of a cupboard and I saw something mucky on that cupboard door, I'd know it was cat sick, because what else is it going to be? Head height wall cupboard doors don't get anything else on them.

My old cleaners were troopers and would clear up cat sick if they found it. I would never, ever leave it for them knowingly. In your text exchange, you should have immediately said, of course, I wouldn't expect you to clean up cat sick. I am so sorry.

You get through a LOT of cleaners. I feel like this is probably a you problem, not a them problem.

I can't afford a cleaner any more. My house is cleaned by me and my husband, to our very high standards. It takes WAY longer than I'd want to pay a cleaner for a week. You need to lower your expectations of what's possible. Or clean yourself. I quite enjoy it.

Sleeps on top of it and spewed down it.

Cats are arseholes.

I think I agree with this to some extent. My cleaner is lovely. Some weeks she is a bit flakey and cancels. She charges by the hour and if she runs out of time to do something she will let me know. She always asks what I’d like to prioritise.

I have several bathrooms which my [autistic] teens are rubbish and keeping tidy so the night before she comes I always pop bleach etc in the loos to make them less gross when she comes and I insist my kids empty their bins and pick up their laundry off the floordrobe. I would never expect her to clean pet sick or pick up my kids dirty undies/socks etc. That is my job and in the exchange OP had, I would have immediately sent back a reply to the effect - ‘oh am so sorry for the misunderstanding. I hadn’t realised the cat had been sick as I was in a hurry this morning when I noticed the. My bad. Of course you shouldn’t have to clean that up!’ But that window has been missed now, I think.

Interesting, ive never had a cleaner and wouldnt want one either.

But makes me wonder what you can expect a cleaner to "clean" I wouldnt have thought a bit of cat sick would be out of bounds.

I can’t get past the fact that your cat lies on top of the utility room wall cupboards vomiting and this seems not to be a big thing. You know the vomit/cat juice almost certainly spatters on top of the cupboard too, and even seeps down inside the cupboard where the door join is? This is really gross.

The cupboard needs to have everything removed from it & to be cleaned inside with a bleach spray - no wonder the cleaner did not do it! Just wiping the outside is not enough!

I would be prioritising (a) stopping the cat getting on the cupboard by blocking access and (b) brushing the cat daily and giving it anti-hairball treats - rather than complaining about the cleaner. Cats do vomit, mine did a couple of weeks ago, thankfully not in or on a cupboard, but it’s not a good sign and cat owners should look at the cause as well as cleaning up.

all my friends that have cleaners tell me they are too busy and won't give me their numbers

I know someone who treats her cleaners terribly. They always either quit or she fires them. She talks to them like dirt on her shoe. She also always asks the rest of us for our cleaners numbers and we would never, ever pass our cleaners numbers to her.

I fear that is what is happening here.

The fact that none of your friends will give you the numbers of their cleaners tells me all I need to know.

I disagree - it’s clear from the tone of the OP’s posts that she has a superior attitude and is also somewhat lacking in self-awareness.

Well now you know otherwise. Would a dog poo on the carpet be out of bounds?

Her job is to clean. She didn't do it. There's always pity and excuses from some people who defend cleaners but can you imagine if you only did the bits of your job that you liked? Maybe get an agency cleaner.

I've clearly not had enough sleep because I read this as years ago you used to clean donkeys. I was thinking that's quite specific, just donkeys? Maybe the occasional horse? And why didn't people just clean their own donkeys? Yep afternoon nap is definitely needed.

You sound like a difficult client.

I think if you want to keep her you need to back down. You ultimately noticed it but have used it to criticise her.

Sometimes also people need to speak in person and stop relying on text messages where things can get lost. Speak to her and sort it out.

I think people need to have a bit of respect for their cleaners. After a lifetime in childcare I gave up and became a self employed cleaner. I loved it (retired a year ago) but sadly did come across a few people like the OP.
I would never clean up after animals, other than vacuuming cat/dog hair. Certainly not cat sick, surely if OP saw it shouldn't she have wiped it up before cleaner arrived?

No wonder friends wont pass numbers on.

I remember spending 4 hours cleaning upstairs of a house. 4 bedrooms, family bathroom and and en suite. Dirty underwear left on floor; literally couldn't see bedroom floors for toys, books, clothes; shower traps full of hair looked like they had never been cleaned; bins overflowing with used tampons; (I could go on). Anyway I worked incredibly hard non stop for 4 hours and was pleased with the results. Planned to return following week to do downstairs, homeowner mentioned I'd missed polishing mirror in one of the bedrooms. No mention of all the hard work I'd done.
I didn't return

Oh just to mention, as I said I retired a year ago many of my old customers are still looking for a cleaner. Not easy to find good, reliable cleaners who are DBS checked, insured and registered with the tax man and reliable

I think most cleaners expect to keep on top of day-to-day muck and grime, not to have to deep clean vomit/faeces/urine/blood, not to have to do things like washing up unless it is specifically part of the contract and so on. I can see why she was annoyed. You should apologise and ask her to come back.