A stranger on holiday never to be seen again

[Anotherrainydaynosurprise]

Just back from a sunny holiday and got chatting to a stranger by the pool bar. I was just with my daughter. We both talked about our love of a certain sport (I don't want to out myself). Our conversation was ended by my DD wanting to go back and sit by the pool. Back on my sunbed he looked at me but I was shy and looked away. I didn't see him again as I was flying back the next day.

Now home I find myself thinking about him a lot - we had a connection and he had a lovely voice. I wish I'd got his name so I could look him up. Not sure what I'm asking here - it's just I don't have these kind of connections very often and when I do I don't forget them and I thought in my 50s I wouldn't have this again but I had one last year and now again. It's the sliding doors moment of what would have happened if I had another day there or if we were able to chat for longer...

Anyone else meet an attractive stranger never to see them again?

No, but any inclination to find him?

I tried to find him through the sport but I can't. I just need to forget about it

Have you tried people you may know on fb, it usually throws up people youve been in proximity with. Or going on the hotel fb page?

Have you looked through your holiday photos to see if he appears in the background anywhere and do an image search?

Check the hotel’s social media pages and recent TripAdvisor reviews?

It seems romantic and a 'lost chance' because it was so brief. The reality is that there's no more chance this man would be a suitable romantic partner for you than anyone else you might bump into. You didn't talk for long enough to uncover any snags or incompatibilities. He might be married, not attracted to women, in a LTR, a serial killer, the most boring man on the planet... you simply don't know.

Next time this kind of thing happens, take the bull by the horn and ask for his number or his 'socials' - the worst that can happen is a refusal, hopefully a polite one if it's someone you've been getting on with.

Oh no, I met my OH in a similar way, except we bumped into each other by chance as I was leaving to go home the next day, and swapped phone numbers. We are getting married later this year.

@MoiraPlunkettAgree with you apart from the not attracted to women..definitely 100% heterosexual.

Good idea re socials will do that next time

@Ginorchocoh wow that’s amazing! Obvs meant to be!

It was, it was a last minute holiday for me after being fed up at work so booked the day before, and his connecting flight was delayed, neither was supposed to really be there. If it happens again, maybe suggest swapping numbers, the sport connection you had was a good excuse to do so. You never know!

Reminds me of the song: "The People That You Never Get to Love", Rupert Holmes. Marion Montgomery does a lovely version of it...

I would console yourself with the thought that if he had wanted to date you in the real world, he would have asked for your name or number or socials either when you left or when he was sitting across from where you moved to.

OP, if he was interested in more than sharing a longing glance, he would have asked for your number.

Please don't follow any of the suggestions on here for stalking him!

Take it as confirmation that you still desire and attract these kinds of relationships, and will meet someone soon.

That is very creepy

Bloody hell this thread is a stalkers dream.

Op it's easy to feel a connection when you're chilled out on holiday and chatting to someone. If either of you wanted to take it further you would have done so while you were chatting.

A romance made entirely in your mind is something reality will never live up to. He's probably married or has a partner and you acting like pp suggest and tracking him down could throw a grenade into his life when all he did was have a conversation with you.

YABU for talking about an 'outing' sport. FFS.

🤣

This happens all the time on MN - "outing" sport or hobby🤔

People are going to start using it as proof of long-time posting, aren't they? Penis beaker, Sistine chapel, massive salad, outing sport.

I may be very tempted to post on the hotel review site... Looking to speak with bloke who chatted to me about owl stretching last week...

If you both loved a certain sport can you trace him through that?

I did years ago. A man in the park was lovely and very attractive and we just clicked. He said he was divorced and I was in a very unhappy marriage. I was too scared to accept any contact details because although my marriage had to end I was terrified of my husband and any unknown numbers would have caused so much trouble. So he was a passing glimpse of possibility.
I did leave and remarry but I sometimes think of him as a brief what if in a non wishful way, just a curious moment.

I've had 2. Both on holiday.

1 - I DID look him up. Lived the other end of the country but we got together and had a 15 year relationship. (Yes, REALLY!!!)

2 - A second one that I really liked the look of. I was feeling fairly attractive after a bout of ill health and really, really wish I'd made the effort to go and talk to him (he was subtly giving me the eye, both my friend and I saw it). He was a nice looking man around my age. He was on my flight home, so lived somewhere at least in my general vicinity. Oh the regrets! But then, based on number 1 (above) maybe it was for the best 😂!

It's entirely possible that someone out there is telling him that "if she was interested, she would have asked"...

These moments in life are often very fleeting. OP, I'd try to learn from this if you can. Be brave next time!

That's true. But if they both missed the moment, I'd say it's not meant to be. What's for you won't go by you, and all that.

Maybe it would be different the other way round, but if I shared a fleeting glance with someone on holiday, and then they used the hotel's social media to find a photo of me, and then used that to track me down on social media and message me, I would be really creeped out!