Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to scream and shout and stamp my big fucking feet?

81 replies

bangbangbang · 16/06/2008 09:10

I'm so pissed off because we are having to leave our rented house because we just cannot afford to live here.

Dp is works for a company but he is classed as self employed and the little prick that sorts out the work for everyone doesn't like my dp so he is not earning enough money.He can't say anything to his boss coz he will just say leave then.

We asked to go live with dp's mum in her 3 bed council house that the selfish bitch has all to herself but she said no coz she wants £100 a week.We are going to live with my mum in her 3 bed house so we will all be in 1 bloody room coz my brother still lives at home.My mum is fab and only wants half of rent and council tax which totals £75 a week.

We just need to save for a few months and have a really tight budget so we can either save a deposit or just back up for rent when times get hard.
If i get a job we don't get hardly any ctc and we would have to sort out childcare.

I'm seriously thinking of splitting up with dp and going to the concil to see if they will put us in tempory housing coz at the end of the day i have to make sure my dd's are housed.We was told a couple of years ago that because dp works they will not give us a council flat so theres no point going on the list.

I just don't fuking get it and don't see how we can live without money.To live in our 3 bed house in a shitty rough part of town is £750 a month so with council tax, water, gas and electric it's about £1000 a month.
When dp is only earning £200 a week how do we pay the bills and survive?
I just dont get how other people do it.

Sorry for the rant i just need to get it out and i already feel better.

OP posts:
ruddynorah · 16/06/2008 13:56

yes you do.

namechangerforagoodreason · 16/06/2008 13:57

Yes but if he works volountarily for nothing wouldn't we lose the benefits? Actually I'll get him to ask about it at the jobcentre thanks for the info.

BEAUTlFUL · 16/06/2008 13:58

How much do they get paid, and what kind of discount? I think i'm going to do this!

Original poster
bangbangbang · 16/06/2008 14:24

dp would never go on the dole it would not benefit us in anyway the whole point of this is to be able to save for our own house so our children have a secure future and an inheritance.
If i have to lie to the council to get a flat in a poxy towerblock for a year then i will if it means we can save for our own house or to even rent but atleast we would have money saved if work got bad again.

His accountant has said if we can get through the next year then things will get better and there will be more work.

It is not my intention to live in a council house and be on benefits i do not want that.
I just need a flat for a year where we dont have to pay over £1000 a month.

It's not like it hasn't been done before.

OP posts:
Tortington · 16/06/2008 14:35

i still dont understand why you aren't contacting the council
cab
shelter
for advice on how to do this as a family

i think i am correct in thinking that this is less about a housing issue

and more about fraudulently claiming Housing benefit, council tax benefit and income support?

if it is indeed the latter - i will stop harping on

but please don't try and make ou that it is through lack of housing that forces you into this situation when you have done a whole lot of naff all to right your circumstance.

TigerFeet · 16/06/2008 14:40

Am increasingly thinking it's the latter custy

The OP could rent a 1 bed flat privately if she's happy to live in a 1 bed council flat - it's the 3 bed semi they are struggling to afford

Yes it has been done before - which is why people in genuine need struggle to get social housing.

Original poster
bangbangbang · 16/06/2008 14:42

dp has only just told me that work is only going to get worse.

I will not be claiming any benefit especially not income support.

'a whole lot of naff' yeah your right i've sat here crying all fuking day thinking how to keep my family together. it really fucks me off that people who do cheat the system get more money than us.

a girl i know gets her house paid for she gets income support, tax credits and csa and her bloody boyfriend lives with her.Shes just been paid £150 to do a computer course but has no intention of ever returning to work.

OP posts:
Original poster
bangbangbang · 16/06/2008 14:43

i bed flat is £550 a month
council tax is £113 a month
gas and electric is 20 a week
water?

OP posts:
Original poster
bangbangbang · 16/06/2008 14:45

and that was 4 years ago when we first lived together now its more expensive.

OP posts:
Tortington · 16/06/2008 14:49

have you contacted the council yet

the CAB

Shelter

?

TigerFeet · 16/06/2008 14:50

But I don't see how pretending to dump your dp is going to help your cause - if you do that you will be fraudulently getting housing benefit, income support etc etc - plenty of people work hard and struggle but if we all defrauded the system then we'd all be up shit creek fairly quickly

Why can't you save up by living with your family for a while?

That's what I'd do in your situation

I work so that we can afford decent housing but would rather be at home with my daughter - perhaps I shoudl dump dh and go crying to the council with cap in hand looking for a flat and handouts so I could do that? Funnily enough I have been seriously advised to do that - but my conscience won't let me.

Tortington · 16/06/2008 14:53

she might not have to live with her family for a while

that's the point

she hasn't contacted the council to tell them she can't afford her rent becuase her husband is self employed - and what strategies do they have to help her

she simply hasn't done it

Original poster
bangbangbang · 16/06/2008 14:55

we are moving in with my mum i just said it was an option if things get worse and it doesn't work out with my mum and brother.

I've tried ringing CAB but its bussy i will keep trying.

I probably wouldn't have lied anyway i just get frustrated that we don't have a pot to piss in at the mo.

When dp's work is good it's really good and can earn £700 a week so we won't have to stay long.

OP posts:
Tortington · 16/06/2008 14:58

i pay 400 per month. for social housing. thats a 3 bed all to my family.

worth a phone call to council?

TigerFeet · 16/06/2008 15:06

So why don't you ring the council and see what they can do? You may end up in a decent house in a nice area - somewhere you are happy to stay - without having to lie?

No one is saying you shouldn't rant and moan - we all do that (well I do certainly!!) - but sometimes you have to take a deep breath and think rationally about what you can do to help yourself without going on an internet forum and discuss how to defraud the system, even if it's only banging ideas around. I think the problem here is you have let your mind run away with what might happen without sorting out the immediate problem.

CAB - you may have to go to the offices if you can. When I went to see them I presented myself during their open surgery times and waited my turn. Far quicker than repeated and possibly futile phone calls.

Hope you get sorted out with a decent place to live soon

muggglewump · 16/06/2008 15:08

I know a girl, lived in my street actually who pays less for her 3 bed new build than I do for my 2 bed because hers is social housing.

Make that call!

lou031205 · 16/06/2008 15:08

I have put your details through www.entitledto.co.uk and according to that, you should be getting:

Housing benefit £98.22 per week (£425 per month)

CTC £126.28 per week (£547 per month)

This is based on annual salary of £12700, (£200 per week net of tax/ni). Also assumes that Local Housing Allowance for your area is equal to your rent.

That is higher than you get right now, so you need to get yourselves reassessed.

£972 per month would help.

lou031205 · 16/06/2008 15:10

Also free milk and vitamins.

lou031205 · 16/06/2008 16:03

bbb?

BEAUTlFUL · 16/06/2008 17:23

BBB, you and your partner are both able-bodied and fit to work -- so work. If you want a "secure future" for your kids, you'd show them by example how to achieve financial security through their own efforts, not just by scamming the council.

Original poster
bangbangbang · 16/06/2008 17:49

have just got back from the council office and they said because dp normally earns good money 'we can afford to rent from the private sector'.

she said if we dont pay rent and get evicted then they will put us in tempory housing but she said it's not a pleasant place to be and she's sure we will get through it.

beautiful if people on benefits WON'T work why should i give up seeing my babies in the day?(thats just the people i know i am not meaning anybody else),i think i feel like this b ecause if it was a mortgage to pay then it would be different but it's dead money.

OP posts:
lou031205 · 16/06/2008 18:03

BBB, the issue is not rent vs mortgage. If your DP is not earning enough money, at the moment, apply for Housing Benefit, and inform CTC, then when your wages go up, inform them again.

lou031205 · 16/06/2008 18:04

You don't need to be asking about social housing, you just need to be making sure that you get the financial help you are entitled to according to your present circumstances.

hercules1 · 16/06/2008 19:43

People who work nights manage. THey have to. We had no choice when we had dd. Dh worked nights and looked after the kids in the day. Far more ideal but it was that or lose the house. Loads of people where dh worked were in the same position.

BEAUTlFUL · 17/06/2008 12:10

"beautiful if people on benefits WON'T work why should i give up seeing my babies in the day?"

Sorry, I don't understand what you mean. Do you mean why should you be the only one working when everyone else you know just claims benefits instead? Is that it?

If it is, then it pays to work because your money will go up! The sky's the limit! Nobody will tell you what you can have, you'd get as much as you were prepared to earn.

You could see your kids all day and do supermarket shifts early-evenings. Seriously, I'd look into that. And don't let your DP mope about complaining he never gets any work -- inspire him to get out there & charm the bloke into sendiong more jobs his way. You could inspire him to earn more money. Do it! Do it do it do it.