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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

The driveway drama continues. Neighbours are still driving me insane. What should I do now?

334 replies

9champions · 16/02/2026 11:14

I’m not sure if anyone remembers my last thread, but to save me from explaining the background, I’ll link it here - https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5482826-neighbour-using-my-drive-landlord-wont-help-what-can-i-do?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=app_share

I’m not really looking for opinions on that since we’ve already discussed it. However, I’d like to hear your thoughts on what’s happened since then and what I should do next.

After chatting with the neighbour and her outright refusing to stop, I decided to put up my own fence for some privacy and to stop her from using my driveway. I considered putting down planters, boulders, etc. (which I’ll get to in a minute), but I figured a fence would be a better option since it’s sturdier. It’s not ideal because my driveway is pretty narrow, and the extra cost is frustrating, but their fence is right on the boundary line anyway, so hopefully, it won’t make a big difference, and I’ll still have enough space to get in and out of my car.

I’ve been trying to get someone to come over and give me a quote for the last few weeks, but I’ve been let down a couple of times. Finally, someone is coming this week to have a look. Now, about the planters. I’ve been parking my car there as usual, but somehow she’s still managed to squeeze past. I wanted to put something there while I was away this weekend until the fence was up, so I placed 2 long thin planters there (on my land, not hers). I got home yesterday, and there was a knock on the door. It was her saying she ran over the planters and broke them, offering to pay for a new one, etc. I said no (they were £2.50, so I’m not going to bother asking for that), but isn’t this just ridiculous? The planters were on my drive, so the only reason she hit them was because she drove over my property. She tried to claim she clipped them with her back wheel, but that wouldn’t have happened if she wasn’t cutting across the drive in the first place. It was honestly like something out of a comedy sketch.

I’d be more sympathetic if this was their only choice, but it’s not. They could:

Take down their fence so he can park the van there instead and put the car on the street to create more space.

Talk to the landlord again about the fence.

Talk to their neighbours and ask them to leave more room on the road for the van.

Move the van when she needs to go out or come back home.

They’re opting for the easiest, most convenient solution, even if it means damaging someone else's property. It just reaches a point where it becomes bone idle.

So what should I do now? Continue with the fence and hope she doesn’t crash into it or damage it? I can let the planter go, but not a fence. I’ve already asked her nicely, and she made excuses. I’ve put obstacles in her way, and she’s just driven over them. So what else can I do? Should I really have to go through all this trouble to stop someone from using my property?

What’s even more confusing is that she says she can’t get out of her car on the side of the fence because there isn’t enough space, so she has to pull onto the driveway instead of reversing and driving off in a straight line. But her partner was in the passenger seat yesterday and got out on that side just fine, so there’s clearly enough room. I think she’s just a bad / lazy driver and doesn’t want to reverse on.

Before anyone says it’s not causing any damage, I don’t care. It’s my property, and I don’t want them using it. If it was now and again, that would be different, but not every day, multiple times a day. They've been dicks and unhelpful in the past, so no, I don't feel like helping them out either.

Neighbour using my drive, landlord won’t help. What can I do? | Mumsnet

I’ve lived in my house for almost 4 years now, and I had a new drive put in last year, which cost a fair bit. Parking on my street isn’t great anyway,...

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5482826-neighbour-using-my-drive-landlord-wont-help-what-can-i-do?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=app_share

OP posts:
Thread gallery
13
BudgetBuster · 16/02/2026 11:20

Ohhh I followed yiur last thread and then couldn't find it when looking for updates.

I think you 100% need a camera (whether it's a blink camera out your bedroom window pointing to your driveway or a ring doorbell if it'll pick up the drive and fence). Proceed with your fence, and if they damage it then knock and with the invoice of the cost of the fence and cost to have it erected etc and tell her she needs to replace it ASAP.

If she doesn't or tried to disagree, I'd contact the police for criminal damage and pursue her in small claims if needed.

She needs to be taught a lesson.

Greenqueen40 · 16/02/2026 11:26

100% what the first poster said

UninitendedShark · 16/02/2026 11:28

Agree also. Fence and camera.

ZookeeperSE · 16/02/2026 11:29

Make sure it’s a fence with concrete posts and base boards and then if she does hit it her car will come off worse than your fence.

HappyFace2025 · 16/02/2026 11:31

ZookeeperSE · 16/02/2026 11:29

Make sure it’s a fence with concrete posts and base boards and then if she does hit it her car will come off worse than your fence.

This.

pizzaHeart · 16/02/2026 11:32

Fence and camera.
and you might be surprised how her driving skills would improve under threat of paying for a fence damage.

ifonlyitwasreal · 16/02/2026 11:35

Wow 😂 You can’t risk a fence. Needs to be extremely heavy boulders or a bollard

icouldholditwithacobweb · 16/02/2026 11:40

She's being a lazy, entitled bitch. No idea how people like this walk around in the world thinking their behaviour is acceptable. Unfortunately, since she is the way she is, you are going to have to go the route of putting something absolutely immoveable on your driveway to prevent her ridiculous behaviour. She's got zero intention of respecting your property unless she has no other choice.

Tableforjoan · 16/02/2026 11:41

Fence and camera. She’s a cheeky sod.

Growlybear83 · 16/02/2026 11:42

I think I would invest in large concrete planters rather than a fence. It would probably be cheaper, and the neighbour would really cause damage to her car if she hit them. They would also look nicer if you fill them with flowers.

minerva7 · 16/02/2026 11:42

I would put up a camera, trained to the top of the drive, at the same time as the fence.
As cheeky as she has been so far I would expect that she will damage your fence.
I hope I am wrong and that that will spell the end of her nonsense.

HappyFace2025 · 16/02/2026 11:43

Low brick wall?

Pastit12 · 16/02/2026 11:46

I don’t know if this has been suggested before on you previous post but what about the penguin bollards to stop her or would that
Inconvenience you too much
be more expensive than a fence

Whattodo1610 · 16/02/2026 11:50

When she knocked and told you what happened, what did you say? Aside from declining her offer of payment for the broken pots? It was the perfect opportunity to say along the lines of “to be honest, if you drive correctly, not coming onto/using my drive, you wouldn’t have broken the pots. You need to stop this now, there’s a fence going up”. I really hope you said something along these lines, it was a golden opportunity, and could actually stop this now.

8misskitty8 · 16/02/2026 11:56

I'd have accepted the money (would have given a higher price) and also told her that you were going to speak to your insurance about the damage as it was caught on camera but wont do that now as she has paid for the damage. Might be enough to deter her from doing it again.
Then get a camera.

Shatteredallthetimelately · 16/02/2026 12:06

I agree, although to late now i'd have asked how she managed to ruin your planters when they were well within your own boundary.

Will putting a fence up obscure your or anyone's else view when it come to pulling on onto the road?

I'd maybe go for concrete or sturdy metal planters....think cattle trough size, with maybe fast growing whisby bamboo plants in them that way they be cheaper, neighbour can see them so shouldn't hit them and shouldn't obscure vision.

Friendlygingercat · 16/02/2026 12:24

Unfortunately fences with concrete base boards and posts are expensive and is going to cost OP several hundred at the least. Im in favour of a camera plus something large and substantial like concrete planters or a large bolder. They will probably cost less than a fence and not be so vulnerable. So long as they are completely on your land they are simply a decorative feature. Your neighbour has no cause for redress if she hits them. There was a thread a few days ago where the homeowner placed decorative rocks on his land and the neighbour hit them. Its not your fault that the neighbour has poor driving skills.

Cordeliasdemonbabies · 16/02/2026 12:28

She will definitely break a fence unless it has a sturdy concrete pillar at the end and concrete gravel boards. Even then she is likely to damage it.

I would abandon the fence idea and go for some sort of wall or solid planter. Like this maybe: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0D2D4DMQL?ref_=cm_sw_r_cso_cp_apan_dp_4GZ9GEZJ0Y71J56W4VV7

Amazon

Amazon

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0D2D4DMQL?ref_=cm_sw_r_cso_cp_apan_dp_4GZ9GEZJ0Y71J56W4VV7&tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-am-i-being-unreasonable-5491399-the-driveway-drama-continues-neighbours-are-still-driving-me-insane-what-should-i-do-now

Luluissleeping · 16/02/2026 12:31

Could you put a brick wall there?

Citrusbergamia · 16/02/2026 12:31

HappyFace2025 · 16/02/2026 11:43

Low brick wall?

Yes, I'd do a brick wall rather than fence.

UncannyFanny · 16/02/2026 12:36

You either build a wall on your side of the boundary or a low fence using concrete posts and concrete gravel boards rather than wood panels. That’s it, there’s no further dilemma. You just go ahead with it.

9champions · 16/02/2026 12:39

Cordeliasdemonbabies · 16/02/2026 12:28

She will definitely break a fence unless it has a sturdy concrete pillar at the end and concrete gravel boards. Even then she is likely to damage it.

I would abandon the fence idea and go for some sort of wall or solid planter. Like this maybe: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0D2D4DMQL?ref_=cm_sw_r_cso_cp_apan_dp_4GZ9GEZJ0Y71J56W4VV7

I was considering concrete planters or something like what you’ve suggested. I really like this idea and it would definitely be cheaper than a fence. The only issue is that the strip where I’d put it is only 15cm wide, and everything I’ve looked at is much wider and would extend onto the driveway. A fence would be slimmer and fit just right, but considering her driving skills, I agree it’s probably not the best choice. I’ll have to keep looking, and maybe the fence guy will suggest something too.

OP posts:
viques · 16/02/2026 12:39

Dear neighbour

Just to let you know I am getting quotes to put up a fence on my drive. The fence will run from the end of your landlords fence to the end of my property. I don’t think there will be any issue as both of us only use our drives for parking. I will let you know the installation date when I have it, and will of course ask the fence installers not to park their van so that it inconveniences anyone trying to access their drive or off road parking as I know that this can be annoying.

SheIsMyMother · 16/02/2026 12:43

Can you not just park your car further down the drive so she can’t drive over that bit?

SheIsMyMother · 16/02/2026 12:44

Guess it doesn’t deal with what happens when you are out.

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