Random things you believed as a child light hearted

[NimbleHiker]

I thought that my neighbours were moving their furniture about when it thundered. I thought that the moon was made of cheese. I thought that periods started on the first day of each month.

Up until I was about 10, I thought I was born in Warsaw, Poland. I was very disappointed when I found out I was born in Walsall (sorry, Walsall)

I thought that Public Weighbridge was a town. I was definitely older than I should have been when I realised it wasn't.

White dog poo was caused by the large amounts of calcium in the canned dog food at the time.

That the beams of sun through a cloud were souls going up to heaven.

My best friend believed that when you were born ( as a girl)you had a teeny tiny baby inside you. In order for it grow you had to get married in a white dress and have a party when you were a grown up . Her reasoning was that everyone in the family had a white wedding and months later a baby arrived
I was convinced that you couldn't get pregnant if you had sex standing up.

I didn't understand why 9-5 was peak hours for phone calls, because surely everyone was busy at work, not phoning each other!

My best friend and I thought thought maybe we could save up some pocket money and buy a jet pack, and that jet packs were things that were publicly available and you could literally fly with them - not that they were experimental things that probably cost c.$1m each, were only owned by NASA and could only lift you off the ground for a few metres at a time.

That wind was caused by the trees moving, creating a draught

NUNS!

I had thick long hair, my pride and joy.
Somehow, as a child, I believed that nuns cut off all of your hair.

I was so scared of them getting hold of me and shaving my head.

I believed there was a children’s prison. Fortunately I’d stopped believing this when I read Jacob Two Two meets the Hooded Fang, otherwise I’d have been seriously freaked out.

When I was in year 3, a friend had a pencil case with buttons that made various parts of it open (I’ve seen similar ones in Smiggle more recently). I asked him what two other buttons on the back were for. He said they would blow everything up, and he said it so seriously, that I believed him! Years later, I mentioned this. He said he (almost) believed it as well.

This makes complete sense and is exactly the sort of thing I would have thought.

We used to have the radio on for the news at lunch time. I thought there were lots of lovely people in the world, as so many of them were helping police with their enquiries. 😱

My Mum used to wear a hat and secured it with a hatpin. She would fiddle to get it right, and told me that was because she had had to have her head pierced and had to find the holes, just like with pierced ears.

I do not wish to reveal the age at which I realised neither of these statements were true …

Yes I didn't know that then, I just thought the colour matched white dogs.

I thought that too, until now in fact.

Poodles were solely responsible for white dog poo I believed. And always walked by old ladies.

I always thought sex was when a man and woman rolled around together continuously whilst kissing. That's how they did it on TV anyway!

My friend sprayed the screen wash on her car when we were driving somewhere which i had never seen before and she told me it was a very rare type of cloud that only rains in one place. We were learning about clouds in school and I told my teacher all about it on Monday.

I thought if you peeled a pineapple, it would be in chunks (had only had pineapple from a tin).

When I was little, Boots had a sign stating it was The Dispensing Chemist.

Being 6, I'd never heard the word 'dispensing' and assumed they'd just spelt disappearing wrong.

I was at the height of my Enid Blyton phase and believed that it meant Boots disappeared like the lands at the top of the Faraway Tree.

This belief was further compounded when I saw the Ponds Vanishing Cream - vanishing cream was used in The Wishing Chair books.

We looked after next doors chickens when they were away and had to lock them
in due to foxes. I genuinely believed foxes could kill people (like wolves in the fairy stories) and was terrified when my mum would set off to lock them in - risking her own life in the process but seeming oddly unbothered.

Someone told me that if receiving a knighthood from the Queen (Elizabeth II) and you failed to bow or kneel correctly, instead of tapping you on the shoulder with a sword, she would behead you with it. I was only about 5 and believed this, and wondered why anyone would take the risk of being knighted!

I really, genuinely thought my eyes would go square from watching too much television. I would sit feeling my eyes worrying 😂

Can I recommend a very strange novel called Ella Minnow Pea?

There used to be signs for jobs in shops that said 'Apply Within'. I was quite old before I discovered that it wasn't pronounced 'appley', like 'orangey'.

There were ads in my parents' magazines for Canadian Ginger Ale, so I assumed the country was called Canadia. and I still think that's a better name.

I think it's not advised but not illegal. Well i just looked it up cos i thought that too 😆

I'm trying to convince my DC but they don't believe me 😭

I thought that watching my Nana put her hat pins in, that they went into her skull in specific points , I was maybe 6yo , didn't like to ask in case it was confirmed !