For letting a 16 year old walk home?

[Floofatron]

Difference of opinion with DH…
My 16 year old DS is going to a party tonight. It will finish at 11pm ish. He asked if he can walk home with his friends (three others, they are 15 and 16) rather than be picked up like we would usually do. They are all staying at ours. It’s about 45-60 min walk through a fairly peaceful town. He is sensible but I imagine there will be a bit of alcohol at this party. He has a tracker on his phone.
AIBU to let them?

YABU - you should pick them up
YANBU - it’s fine to let them walk

Im pleased to say you are wrong. Despite what the right wing press wants to stir up, violent crime has dramatically decreased since the Eighties.
Not convinced crime against women can be accurately measured, though as this has always and still is massively underreported.

Its true. I think you need to look at where you are getting your news from and consider they might be telling you things that suit their narrative.
Yes, there is.There is still lots of horrific crime around. But there was more when I was growing up.

I think it's fine.

In a group yes. But - I would say that he can change his mind at any time and I would ensure he can order himself an Uber.

Ask him to send you a text when they are leaving.

DSS , 17 this year and in yr 11, walks home from parties with friends doing a route similar to the one you describe and he’s the last on the route so does the last 5 mins alone. But DH makes sure that he has money in his account for an uber if there is no one to walk with. We do live near an airport though so there’s always Uber availability in a reasonably short space of time

No. If it was a shorter walk, then I'd be fine with it 45 mins-1 hour is too long at that time especially when they've been drinking. I would either pick them up or insist on them getting a taxi.

I’d ask DS to give me a quick ring when they are leaving the party and starting the walk, from that phone call I’d be able to gage how much he’d had to drink, how sensible he sounds etc and then if I felt like something could go wrong then I’d go and pick them up. And also I’d know what time he was leaving and what time I should expect him home

Unless they are walking down a motorway i dont see the issue. At 16 they can have their own child.

Depends entirely on the place.

At 16 my parents would have been so glad if I offered to walk and didn't ask for a lift.. but we lived in a very safe town where nothing was ever going to happen.

Only you know your town

I would certainly offer to pick them up, but I certainly don’t see any issue with a group of 16 year olds walking home unless you live in Ciudad Juarez.

I disagree.
I am a London girl- born and bred . Generations before me - never just rocked up to live there/ work etc
When I was growing up, it was safe. Barely any crime bar here and there. We played out all the time , everyone left their back doors open.
It was an entirely different world to the crime ridden cess pit it is now.
We deliberately moved away 17 years ago and it was the best thing that we could have ever done. No way we’re going to bring our children up there . Not a chance.
When I do go there - which is rarely , all I hear is police sirens . Just this week - a huge problem was going on with multiple police cars and officers outside some shops as we drove past. The local Sainsbury’s and Greg’s gets looted on a daily basis- police do fuck all and the shop workers and security guards are terrified to step in , in case they’re stabbed or worse . It’s fucked .
We never had any of this shit when I was little .
The media choose to deliberately hide lots too.

The country has gone to shit . That’s it. End of .

Wow you must be must older that me. I remember reports of the Brixton riots (1981) murdered school teachers and in my teen years saw frequently people's houses/ flats smashed up, muggings etc etc. I moved to London in 83 and no one left doors unlocked etc

He is with friends so I don't see the problem. I am sure both my son and daughter did similar at that age.

Mine have just turned 17/18 so starting to drive and I worry far more about them driving home with friends than walking!

If anything things are less violent in London now than in the 70s and 80s

Well yeah of course. In my day 16 yo were going clubbing so leaving the house on foot at 11pm to stay out til 3-5am. Walking in the dark is something you need to get used to earlier than 16 surely?
Especially If they are in a pair or group they will be fine, I'm sure.

I wouldn’t have with a 16 year old.

How old are you?

That's such a trope 'when I was growing up it was safe..Barely any crime bar here or there. We played out all the time, everyone left their back door open'

My Mum used to say that about East End London in the 60s but only lived there when when she was primary aged but my Nan (her Mum) said it was bullshit, crime was rampant and the Krays and their ilk were violent thugs that terrorised the community of business-owners and made life shit for anyone who wasn't involved in violent crime on their side.

And you couldn't leave your door open.

That was 60 years ago and crime got worse exponentially after that.

But I see an increasing amount of nostalgic bullshit that references my lifetime, primary school in the 80s and secondary in the 90s claiming some weird utopia which hasn't existed outside of small villages since the early 20th century.

Which is the age range I suspect OP is in.

A lot of it is driven by Reform voters or appealing to Reform voters of this fantastic England that existed till just recently and has been ruined by immigration and wokeism.

Also - business is business. There is no Sainsburys or Greggs getting looted daily and their staff being assaulted or threatened every day. They'll just close down. So maybe, just maybe you're exaggerating a bit or are misinformed.

Walk will do them good - sober them up. Let them puke in bins before they get home...

ODFOD

Bluntly .. you’re talking utter nonsense.

How the fuck is London safe ?

How the fuck is London safe ?

Millions of people
Live in London
Travel to work in London
Go to school or university in London
Visit London

Millions of people do all those things Every. Single. Day.
And somehow manage to be perfectly safe.

No-one said London was safe. They were taking issue with your claim that it is far less safe than it used to be. If you can't understand that distinction then there is little point in you engaging in a debate.

You must be pretty depressed @IstillloveKingThistle to have this kind of view. Not something I share in the slightest “this country has gone to shit”. Hopefully you don’t convey this bleak view to your own kids

A year ago I would have said yeah walk home no problem however we were out at a family party and were walking home when a grown man randomly punched one of the young female adults in our family as we walked home. Had never seen him before that incident.

would always arrange to have my young adult children picked up never mind a 16 yr old. It has put me on edge.