To think people who work from home don’t understand this?! And they’re paid more usually

[Ugriap]

I work in a job where I can’t work from home. I get that’s my choice but when I trained, working from home was not common. Now it is in a lot of places. I know I can re train but it’s not that easy!

I can’t just go to appointments during my lunch break. I can’t ever do this. So I have to book leave if I want to get my haircut or dental appointments. Or I go on a weekend so I’m basically having less free time.

A close friend is a high earner and she is always galavanting round during the day then catches up on her work in the evening at her convenience. I can’t understand why people like this don’t get that I don’t have this flexibility?! My time is so much more limited. I feel really isolated from the friendship group these days

On the days I work from home I start an hour early, finish an hour late, and take 15 mins to make my lunch but eat it while working. I have meetings nearly all day, I certainly cant galavant! It is unfair if your friends have cushy wfh jobs where they can do whatever they like, and they need to understand your job isn't like that. But certainly not all wfh or hybrid jobs are that flexible!

Oooooh this a 🎣 10/10

Well done OP, well done! 👏

I totally gallivant during the day when I WFH.

Exactly, just because they are flexible, it doesn’t mean they are not working. It just means they don’t have meetings at a certain time. I WFH and like another poster, am basically available 8am until 10pm, and always contactable on weekends and when I’m on holiday. So I don’t feel at all guilty about ‘gallivanting about’ to yoga or a hair appointment during the day.

Such a weird post. I work 2 days at home, 2 days in the office. I am not paid to work on a Monday but inevitably work 5 days in 4. I record all my time (lawyer) so I know this for a fact. Yes I went to the dentist at 9.30 the other morning, but I was also working at 11pm earlier in the week and can never telly switch off. No gallivanting over here - oh and my hairdresser is closed on my non working day, so that gets done in the weekend!

Maybe she does get it? I’m in a situation much like your friend’s, and I absolutely understand I’m lucky to have this flexibility. That doesn’t change the situation though. Different professions have different requirements 🤷‍♀️

The grass is always greener...

I worked from home for four years and I left that job specifically to return to an office based role.

From the outside, the flexibility to do the school run, or go to a lunch time gym class, probably made it look as though I had a lot of free time, and there were definitely positives aspects. However, I did feel like I was living at work, without a clear start and end to my day. I worked many more hours than I was paid for and the job took over my life. Working out of the house gave me back my work / life boundaries.

Things are not as they seem from the outside. You are only seeing it from one perspective and the problem with envy, is that you filter out all the negatives, viewing the positives in isolation.

100% this! Covid did create this wfh vs people who can't wfh (because the nature of their job just doesn't allow it - tree surgeons, police, cleaners, carers etc) culture. The ones who wfh can unload/load the dishwasher, walk the dog, take kids to/ from school, peg out the washing etc whereas those who still have to work in the real world have to do all those things around their ft jobs. This inevitably causes resentment. It is unfair but I guess it's the nature of the job one chooses to do. I'm SE so can "gallavant" if I want to - that's why I'm SE! But it's all swings and roundabouts in any job - those wfh-ers might envy the OP as she has clear, defined working hours, gets to spend time with other people etc Because so many wfh-ers take the mick employers are making them come back to work now anyway.
Maybe look for the positives in your current job role OP, or consider going pt if you want a better work/life balance - appreciate this will mean a pay cut but you just need to assess your priorities.

I think resentment is a bit strange over this as all jobs are and have always been different. Some let you work your own hours, some are paid more, some give you a car, some give you more than the standard annual leave, some have flexi, some you barely have any work in the first place and spend your day reading the news, some are physical, some are sedentary, some require travelling around the country, some require travelling to other countries.

I agree about the trade-offs - working from home means sometimes it feels like you never really leave work. You end up 'just finishing this' and before you know it you've worked another two hours. Some people get that back, some don't, but sometimes not have that very clear line of leaving work is draining.

I WFH. It does mean I can walk the dog, pop out to a lunchtime exercise class, be here when the kids get home from school, if my schedule allows.

However, I am freelance so the buck stops with me. If I were salaried and working from home, I kind of lean towards what the OP is saying. Of course being at home allows one more freedom over working in an office!

My mid morning Pilates class yesterday was completely packed - surely not everyone in it was freelance/part-time?! 😂

I'm a hybrid worker, and I don't get my haircut in the week, that's not how working from home works! We are working.

You are talking about flexi working where people do things in the day, and then do stuff in the evening. Lots of people do that, sometimes to do the school run etc. This is often to suit work though not just us and can be applied wherever you work. Sometimes I might need to attend a meeting on my NWD or before/after my usual working hours, so I take the time back when it suits me/doesn't have a detrimental effect on core work duties that can't be moved.

It's ridiculous to suggest that people who don't WFH should have more annual leave. You don't get less free time! It's the same, even if people do switch their working week around to fit in appointments. They are still making up the hours at other times.

I work hybrid - on my wfh days my lunch break is usually spent running the hoover around or washing up. I actually enjoy my in office lumches more because i can walk or have coffee with a colleague or gp to the shops. There are pros and cons to both - i spoke to someone recently whose company closed the office post covid, and they say wfh full time has ruined their life, they feel lonely and isolated a lot of the time.

Ultimately if you dont have the balance you need, look for a new job rather than bash your 'friend'

Pre-covid my gym was still always packed at 9am. SAHMs and part time working mums who had just dropped their children at the adjoining school. It's not that surprising.

Yep. I have an arrangement with my employer on a specific day around school runs. It doesn't mean I'm just taking free time during the day, it gets made up at some point during that week. I can go to an appointment during the day but the time is either made up or taken with annual leave/flexi, and I can only do it if there's other sufficient cover. Which would be (and is) just the same as if I was physically in the office.

As an academic I WFH 2/3 days a week long before it was generally available. Academics have to do deep research which would be impossible in a noisy office. I would agree tasks with my professor and a date by which they were to be completed. Then I would go off and do the work. It was entirely up to me when I scheduled it. So in theory I could have gone out shopping or to the gym on WAH days and completed the work in the evening or at weekends. In practice the schedule was very flexible. However there were times when I worked through christmas vacation to complete a presentation or an article. You need to be very disciplined and well organized to work in this way. Not everyone is.

Because that’s what the job allows. That flexibility will probably work both ways. It certainly does in my role.

I often have the flexibility to manages my own time but in return I have a lot of responsibilities and work internationally. That can mean meetings in the early hours or late at night or travelling to the other side of the world. And lots of weekend working.

Me popping out for a doctors appointment during the day occasionally doesn’t even register.

This

I went from a very rigid non-work from home job to a flexible wfh job.
I absolutely galavant and go to appointments and walk the dog during the work day. Because I have flexi time. I log my hours and still do the work. I start at 6am and finish around 5.30pm because I take a few hours during the day to deal with other commitments.

I changed jobs because I wanted this flexibility.

Interested to know if you think shift workers should have more annual leave as well? As they can attend appointments during the week around their shifts 🤔

Grow up.

But who says everything in life is fair? Should your friend stop working from home so that you feel you are not missing out? Should everyone else who work from do that too?

I’ve worked from home for over 20 years and with flexibility, because I am an adult and am judged on my performance in terms of what I produce, rather than than the exact hours I am sitting in a chair. This works well for me, as on occasion I can go to an appointment, like seeing my solicitor when buying a house, that isn’t possible to do at a weekend, or go a little further afield than I can normally achieve in a lunch break to collect a prescription I can’t get any closer. And yes, sometimes, taking an early finish to get to a hairdresser appointment, or to reflect the fact I worked until 10pm the night before. In return, because I am senior, conscientious and have work I have to deliver, I often work the equivalent of an additional day or even two each week, regularly working late or starting early, or sometimes completing a piece of work at the weekend.

None of this affects my colleagues, who all work in the hours and locations that their jobs require. This might be very different from me, but doesn’t mean it’s any less ‘fair’. ‘Fair’ doesn’t mean ‘the same’. It’s what is needed to get the job done.

I work from home and have seniority, so I do get to have flexability that others in my company don't.

I'd have the same though in the office. But we're doing a renovation and being at home anytime a tradie needs to pop in, is the icing on the cake.

I don't understand the hate though. I didnt plan this, it's just fallen really well.

(You also forgot to complain that we're also home for our kids after school).

I agree with many responses here. Just as personal experience. I cannot work from home (healthcare) my partner can (IT) his working hours are ridiculous and works way more than he is paid. He has worked today , Saturday, to sort and issue and for half term is already planning on doing 2 hours per day on his annual leave to try to meet a deadline. He after works 12-15 hour days when he is only paid a standard wage. He often doesn't take a lunch break either. I would much rather be in my position where I can leave my work at work than his where it is 24/7 constant contact

It’s not ‘one rule for one’ though, you’re just working in different fields. You’re just coming across really jealous - how is this affecting your friendship group exactly??

I work from home but still only get half hour lunchbreak. Yes I can put washing machine on but used to do that before I went to the office.
But yes love the not having tp drive to work.
But i don't think those not able to work from home should get more leave.