To say Dd can’t perform?

[1400spincycle]

DD (y7) is ND and can as a result lack self awareness. DD loves drama and performing and has signed up for part in the school musical. (All great so far) however she has come home super excited that she has been cast in a lead role. It seems she was cast “even though she missed the singing auditions…’

Unfortunately, she can’t sing a note…

The production is organised by the pupils themselves rather than teacher led which might explain the oversight?

AIBU to try and stop her continuing in the role as I’m really concerned she might become a joke?

Absolutely YABU. She's really excited about doing something, other people have chosen her to do it, and she'd be devastated if you said she couldn't.
Maybe she can't sing in tune but she can be a really charismatic vocalist. Maybe she's a fantastic actress. Maybe the other kids just really like her.
I get where you're coming from, but maybe your worst nightmare - becoming a joke - isn't hers?

How could she have been cast without auditioning? I mean, how did they even know she wanted to join in?

I would be worried too. It’s unlikely to end well, particularly if the kids are arranging it. They may decide to recast her. Is there any solos or is it all group singing. Could you get her some singing lessons? Given she loves drama.

She went to the acting audition… for any part. But missed the singing one

There must be some adult/teacher responsible for the group in some way, can you have a word?

She thinks there is a couple of solos - if it was all choir I wouldn’t be worried

Hmmm, you're right to be wary.

It's very odd that she auditioned for an acting part but was allocated a lead role that she needs to be able to sing for.

You just need to clarify with the teacher who is organising it I think.

Has she done any singing practice? Maybe she can improve? It might be a really good experience for her.
Trying and failing as you fear she’ll do can be good for children as they learn from it, and it might not turn out as bad as you fear.

Unless she's in a stage school very few children in year seven can hold a note! It's not about a perfect performance, it's about building camaraderie, discipline, enjoyment and entertainment. I understand you want to protect your child, but honestly some battles they have to fight for themselves, ND or not, it's part of maturing. The best thing you can do is to support her, help her practice at home and to be there if things do go wrong, but I think trying to stop her will only show her that you don't have any confidence in her. Let her find her own way with this - I've seen plenty of performances in my time with lead players who don't have a brilliant voice but they have amazing charisma and connection with the crowd.

I was given a ‘singing’ part by drama teacher for drama O Level.
cannot sing at all. This was what the part required… rough and ready..maybe the same?

Oh you sound like my mother who was desperate to criticise me and leave me in no doubt that others were better than me.

please challenge your way of doing things and ask yourself why you don’t think it’s your job to be her biggest cheerleader? She obviously was given the role for a good reason and now you’re trying to tear her down.

You know what, the world is so full of awful people and nastiness that the one person who should be trusted to instil confidence is a child’s parent.

What is the show? it may well be that this role doesn't actually call for a good singer. And yes, you should be supporting her - the other kids will surely have heard her in singing classes and know what her talents are

Not all singing roles require a good singer.

Could you get her in for a few singing lessons to give her confidence a bit of a boost, although it doesnt sound like she needs it. Its a school production not a West End stage musical, I reckon she will wing it.
You might just be surprised 😁

Can you say what the musical is and what her part is ? It may be that it is mainly an acting part and the singing doesn't have to be perfect, or she can do the kind of talking in rhythm singing Rex Harrison made famous !

I mean they cast her on her acting ability, good for her, I;d be telling her well done, it's brilliant she is enjoying drama, it's hugely beneficial to kids confidence. Frankly they are 11/12 year olds, none of them are going to be Adele. and Throwing yourself into it with obvious enthusiasm and enjoyment covers a multitude when it comes to school musicals.

Unless she's in a stage school very few children in year seven can hold a note!

You are joking, I assume. I'd say at age 12yo most children can sing in tune okay. I mean we had a choir at junior school, for year 4 and above which was very strict audition and won awards. About 10-12 of the girls in each year would be in it and 4-5 of the boys - not saying the boys were less capable, but fewer auditioned.

How bad is she, OP?

Are we talking about being able to just about hold a tune if she knows the song well, or drone on one note?

If she can hold a tune if she knows the song, then singing lessons might work.
If she drones, then I'd speak to the teacher, if nothing else then there's a good chance someone has heard her and thinks it'll be funny.

People saying she'll probably smash it and she's better than you expect aren't taking into consideration that if she isn't good then she may have her confidence shattered.

I saw Adrian Dunbar in Kiss Me Kate. His singing was mediocre compared to the rest of the cast (and his American accent was a bit hit and miss) but it was no less enjoyable for that.

She might be fine.

She is in the drone category. I’m aware that she isn’t on a par with her peers - it is impossible to recognise what she is singing without her telling me. I love that she’s enthusiastic - but it is telling that the school music teacher encouraged her to be in the ‘makaton’ choir. She has not been chosen for the school choir…

I absolutely want to support her in this but she would be incredibly hurt if it goes badly.

Well I was being a bit tongue in cheek - I was in a national choir at that age and on telly - but this is a school play. People will be watching it for pleasure and not holding it to any degree of how well someone does or does not sing.

Maybe if you talk to the teacher, her songs could be removed or given to another character to sing, or sung as a group, or turned into a poem ? I appreciate you don't want her to be made fun of but it would be a shame for her to miss out on the acting part of the role when she is so keen.

I think pulling her from the show would be damaging to her confidence as she never was afforded the chance to try. I think asking for a compromise might be better as others have said. Or take her to singing lessons, maybe some coaching would really help her.

How well does she get on with the children responsible for selecting the cast OP? If they are good friends this might explain it? If they aren’t I would definitely intervene.

I don’t want to pull her out from the whole show, but was wondering whether to contact the school and flag my concerns to her teacher? I don’t want to interfere unnecessarily- but would want to know if the role could be made more choir based or a group song instead if needed.

I would flag your concerns to the teacher yes.