To sit and think my poor grandmother! What would she think?!

[DurableMatts]

It’s 10:30 and so far today my house has been hoovered/mopped by the robot hoover, the clothes are washed and drying…and I have only had to pop the clothes in and press a few buttons. The house is warm and I’ve done nothing for that as it’s on a thermostat.

I am wfh so I get to earn and I still dropped my dc to school.

My poor granny had 10 dc! She had no washing machine so washed everything by hand! She walked the youngest to school and then came home to clean the house, washed the clothes, hung them out if weather permitted, had to light fires to keep the house warm. And she didn’t earn a bloody penny!

she would be in awe at things today 😢 (and yes I’m well aware that a lot of people still have to do a lot of these things these days…I was just thinking about her is all and it got me)

Although life was hard I have fond memories of coming home from school and the smell of newly baked Welsh cakes and scones greeted me. I got 2 shillings and sixpence pocket money a week. The two shillings bought a savings stamp with a picture of Princess Anne on, and the sixpence was spent on sweets. Once a week the bakers van came round, and the array of fresh cakes was wonderful. I always chose a meringue. Simple pleasures!

The thing is, we aren't able to be objective about our own situations, while we live them.

The women generations before us didn't know there were going to be amazing devices and technology available in years hence, they just lived the life they knew, and if that meant hand-washing, daily shopping, outdoor toilets and so on, then they accepted it. Of course, there were always people with better lives, more money and so on, just like now.

In retrospect, people's (women's especially) lives seemed very hard but most of the time they worked hard, raised their families, and were most likely not given to much introspection about how hard their lives were.

Those posters saying how we shouldn't complain today - we have other, different challenges, that are legitimate for us. Each generation faces both opportunities and challenges - and with every new advance, a problem will arise. It's life.

My parents gave out to me for reading when I should have been studying! The equivalent of me despairing at my teens on their screens instead of doing their work.

Thinking of labour-saving devices, the one thing my grandmother (born in 1918) yearned for was a dishwasher. She had a tiny kitchen, and eventually, in the 90s when she got a new one installed, she managed to fit a tiny dishwasher. She was living alone by that stage, it would take her days to fill it, even though it was tiny, but she absolutely refused to wash up and delighted in using it. She bought each of her adult children a dishwasher as soon as she could - I remember her trying to do so in the 80s for my mum, who worked full time and had 4 of us, so should have wanted it and didn't, it took my DGM years to convince her!

Both my grandmothers had staff. My Mum didn't in the 70s/80s but had all mod cons but didn't return to work until my youngest sibling went to secondary school in the 90s. Mum said she was bored at home (my Dad wouldn't let her go back to work because people would think he couldn't support his family). DH and I both have always worked, both PT when the DC were little but FT since our youngest went to primary school. We do have a cleaner but we are much busier than our parents or grandparents because we both work and both do housework. Also, expectations have been raised for both housework and parenting in comparison to the past (and at work as well, when I started working in the 90s there were lots of male managers who really didn't do very much as they sat in their office all day and we all had tea breaks in the morning and afternoon and a long boozy lunch on a Friday, things are much more intense these days).

Oh yes, my DM used a twin tub until the early 80s. I remember the physical effort required using the big tongs to drag the wet washing into the spinning section.

It’s the washing of nappies that impresses me. No wonder they were trying to potty train by 18 months.

We were in Bow East London just by Roman Road Market, it was fine for us because we were only there for 3 years. As I say we were in 5 storey flats that were built like streets. It was a wonderful mix of 1,2 and 3 bedroom flats As each new family moved in neighbours helped them with child minding, making tea and hanging for the curtain rails.

We were lucky to get a house after being there for 3 years. The flats were concrete and within 20 years they were riddled with damp annd mould and eventually had to be pulled down. That was hard for the residents as they had to be dispersed again, many of them out of the Borough.

it was different for my MILs generation. They had all been there before the war and had very strong connections. A lot of them found themselves trapped in high rise flats, with notorious unreliable lifts,

My Pils moved I to a prefab in South Ockendon in. Essex. They loved it because they had a garden, but after another 3 years they were moved on to house in Dagenham.

Sorry i know he was your great grandad but what a b***d.

Don't worry, he very much was!

Not labour saving devices as such,but I was told a story about my great grandma (my grandads mother)

She answered the door to a pushy salesman who convinced her that he could show her a new labour saving device

She was a strong woman who (with the help of her sister) brought up 4 dc and worked in a shop (she owned it with my great aunt) and ran a home

He came in all smug and threw a thick layer of coal dust all around the lounge

He then turned and said 'I need to plug my vacuum cleaner in'

'What plug?we dont have electricity'

'Don't have electricity' i couldn't cope without it-like every other home,the house runs on it-i panic at a power cut

No mod cons like washer,hoover,kettle,dryer,microwave, iron,cooker etc

God knows how they managed to run their own business,bring up 4 kids,husband away fighting in ww1 (or at home/work) and stayed sane

Grandad swore they where always nicely turned out but the sheer amount of work involved must have been immense

It makes my eyes water just thinking about the nappies alone

(He had to clean the room back to the standard it was in the first place and wasn't happy about it,my great granny and great aunt wouldn't allow him to leave until it was up to their standards)

I would imagine in those days women had even less time to "stand and stare". I would imagine people were less dissatisfied with their lot due to lower expectations. However, child deaths, widowhood and other tragedies and distressing life events were much more frequent and would have taken the same emotional toll as the do now, so I doubt people were happier.

My nana had 10 kids too.
I think it would have been a nightmare, but I think there were some things that made it easier for her, including using the oldest girls to raise the younger ones, making all of them clean the house and they would actually do it, because they'd be belted if they didn't, and the fact that you could just make them go out to play.

Were they Glaswegian by any chance? It sounds like my wee granny & grandpa. So sad if that happened to another lady 😢

Did he buy this after his wife died? But didn't allow her to have one? Or did i misread this?
😢

I was just about to say this. I have had lower back issues for decades and I am sure it is because I worked in an office all my working life, even though I walk a lot. The times when I worked as a temp (in my 60s) and did manual work my back was fine, even though I was lifting heavy objects. Modern life really isn't good for our health.

Incidentally, I used to have a twin tub washing machine and I loved it.

To be fair those pads were actually a revelation! How far we've come now with period pants and period swimwear etc! Stuff my teen DD doesn't think twice about!

That is fascinating. What kind of relationship did he have with his father in the end?

This thread is so interesting.

Your Mum sounds like me!! I bought a brand new twin tub in 1990 as my old one had died and I didn't want an automatic. I don't remember it taking forever to set up however. I live in NZ where we have laundry tubs and there is a rubber tube draining the water from my automatic top loader into the tub. I can see that having a twin tub in a kitchen could be an issue.

I'm in NZ and we don't have central heating and many of us don't have double glazing. We still tolerate 'Jack Frost' in winters!

I had a twin tub - what big tongs? I used to move the wet washing by hand, it wasn't difficult. I loved my twin tub.

My granny had a metered gas geyser, you put the money in and it heated the water and you could use the cooker. She had a teeny square kitchen, that held a cooker, one press, a small fridge, a table and a scully/pantry unit for storage and 2 shelves for delph. The fire heated the sitting room, and nowhere else, we had hot water bottles and a pot for a loo at night. I have no idea where the twin tub was stored lol, and she had a mangle. Clothes went out on the line or an extendable line in the bathroom..She never worked after she married and she did her shopping daily. Must have suited her, she died at 94. But for sure life was a lot harder and more manual then.

They were amazing really imagine washing all these nappies as disposable nappies weren’t invented . My mum was born during a blackout in ww2 . I can’t imagine how scared my gran must of been

That’s a short story there. And the saddest thing I’ve read for a while.

I worked in the NHS doing hard manual work lifting and moving patients in the course of rehab. I trashed my back doing it. I absolutely agree that keeping moving is important and that staying seated for long periods, especially in an inappropriate chair, is not good for anybody, but its in no way as simple as "modern life not good"

sorry, what's "delph" ?

I often think similar when I’m feeling overwhelmed with my life. My grandmother had 4 children under age 4 in a one bedroom London flat during the blitz. No lift. No bathroom. No washing machine. Cooked on an open fire! Husband away at war seemed to fine home impregnate her then leave again. Came home shell shocked and extremely violent and couldn’t hold down a job. No supermarket delivery she’s said only the coal boy would bring the delivery up the stairs. How the f**k do you get your food shopping and 4 young children (baby twins!) up 2 flights of stairs with no help? She had all her children before the NHS existed and no welfare state.

remembering her got me through my poorest times when I first moved into my current home and had no oven or washing machine for a few weeks while I saved up. I had hot water to wash clothes in the bath and a microwave and kettle!

i now too have a robot mop and vacuum. Wonderful things!

That is so sad... and cruel