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AIBU?

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Neighbour using my drive, landlord won’t help. What can I do?

342 replies

9champions · 28/01/2026 18:50

I’ve lived in my house for almost 4 years now, and I had a new drive put in last year, which cost a fair bit. Parking on my street isn’t great anyway, but I’ve recently noticed that my neighbour is using my drive to get to hers. I’m not sure if she’s always done this as I’ve only just noticed. Last week, I caught her in the act while I was outside sorting the bins, and I think she was surprised to see me. I talked to her on Sunday and politely asked if she could stop, but she said it’s difficult for her because her neighbours car sticks out into the space in front of her house, which makes her partners van hang over their drive, so she can’t get in and out without driving over mine.

They can’t park the van on the drive and the car on the street because there’s a fence between our driveways, and the van is too big to fit with the fence there. It’s their fence, on their boundary line btw. I suggested they take it down, but they’re tenants and don’t want to pay for it, which is understandable. Apparently, they asked the landlord a few months back if he would remove it, and he said he was fine with it being taken down, but he wouldn’t cover the cost.

I was thinking about putting up my own fence to stop them, but my drive is already pretty narrow, and then there's the cost involved. I know I could just pay to have theirs taken down, but should I really have to fork out money just to make them stop using my drive? I know it’s a hassle for them, but they should either talk to their neighbours to see if they can leave them more space on the road or have another chat with the landlord about the fence. They’re making this my problem, and I don’t think it’s fair for them to just assume they can use my drive forever. It’s not a shared drive btw. They’re just next to each other, similar to new build estates.

Am I being unreasonable / petty, or are they taking the piss? I’ve attached a diagram. The black squiggles are cars, and the red one is my neighbours car crossing over my drive to get to hers.

Neighbour using my drive, landlord won’t help. What can I do?
OP posts:
Friendlygingercat · 28/01/2026 23:27

OP does not want random people driving across her newly laid drive which is understandable. Not only on principle but also because of extra wear and tear. The solution has been mentioned by many PP above in the form of a large rock or rocks or heavy planter. Personally I would go for the rocks as you can get nice large ornamental ones delivered and they are durable and permanent once in place.. The NDNs problem with the LL is not OPs so no reason to make it such.

NorthXNorthWest · 28/01/2026 23:40

LucyLoo1972 · 28/01/2026 22:17

I agree with this so much!

So why aren't you both off busying yourselves with more important matters?

ReadingSoManyThreads · 28/01/2026 23:46

She's clearly always done this, and you having your drive done meant she wasn't able to drive across it during the works, hence why her drive was unused. You've only just found out about it!

I wouldn't like this either. You could tell her that you revoke any implied permission to your property, therefore next time she uses your drive, she'll be trespassing.

Really though, you need to tell her firmly to never do it again, and that she should be speaking with the neighbour who is obstructing her driveway. If that neighbour is truly obstructing her access, then she can get them towed, or keep reporting them to the council until they finally get it stopped.

As for the fence, I'd be keeping that in place, good fences make good neighbours, and if it gets removed, there'll be nothing to stop them parking over the boundary, leaving you little room to park/get in/out.

nothanks2026 · 28/01/2026 23:47

NorthXNorthWest · 28/01/2026 23:40

So why aren't you both off busying yourselves with more important matters?

Indeed, they apparently have the time and think it worth the effort to scold and minimise the concerns of those with whom they do not agree.

Such a non-problem as they can simply scroll by.

If this is all they have to worry about in life, they are very blessed.

Imbrocator · 28/01/2026 23:55

OP I think the best way to approach it (if you haven’t already mentioned that you don’t want her driving over your new drive because you’re worried about wear and tear) is to politely and straightforwardly get her to ask her other neighbour to move their car forward a bit, because now that you’ve done your drive you’re planning to spruce things up more by adding some plants out the front, and this is probably going to block her access.

If you just go ahead putting the planters in without speaking about it (but having already raised the drive issue) it’s going to look passive aggressive and petty.

JustCabbaggeLooking · 29/01/2026 00:12

9champions · 28/01/2026 22:34

Thanks! I know I asked if I was being unreasonable, and I get that everyone is different - some things bother some people more than others. But honestly, I find it hard to believe all those people saying it wouldn’t bother them at all, especially if their neighbours haven’t been helpful or accommodating in the past.

Anyway, the bins are sitting at the top of the drive, and she’s not home right now. There’s no way she can squeeze through that gap without shifting them, so we’ll just have to wait and see what happens!

Also there is 'new purchase anxiety'.
I have this. I worry about new appliances etc., everybody in the house has to MAKE SURE THEY TAKE CARE, footprints flattening the pile on a new rug - walking on it! then eventually the anxiety lifts.
I would be bothered too, OP.
But I would also wonder if I wasn't being a teeny weeny bit too bothered, too.

I'd be fuming with her because she let me find out. Ignorance is bliss.
Not being bothered won't give her landlord right of way over your property.
She shouldn't have done it without asking, and neighbour 2 doors up needs to shove up a bit.
None of their problems are your problems, and you've admitted with your old drive you wouldn't care.
It's 'new purchase anxiety' while you're surrounded by thoughtless arseholes and are left working out the cost of every micrometer of mineral worn down by her and her vehicle.
It'll pass.
Even I walk on the rug now.

Thepossibility · 29/01/2026 00:15

Is this a British thing, being possessive over a few cms of concrete? On something that was designed to drive on. Where I am no-one could give less of a shit over something so minor. I'd probably encourage my neighbours to do this if it makes life easier for them. If someone was kicking up a fuss about it we would assume metal health problems.
Maybe it would be an issue if they were driving a massive monster truck but a car? On a driveway, for a second?!

CliantheLang · 29/01/2026 00:17

Behold!
A Stepford Mum has arrived to remind us that the only proper position for a woman is on her knees with her mouth open... lest she be seen as - heaven forfend - "passive aggressive and petty".

JustCabbaggeLooking · 29/01/2026 00:24

ReadingSoManyThreads · 28/01/2026 23:46

She's clearly always done this, and you having your drive done meant she wasn't able to drive across it during the works, hence why her drive was unused. You've only just found out about it!

I wouldn't like this either. You could tell her that you revoke any implied permission to your property, therefore next time she uses your drive, she'll be trespassing.

Really though, you need to tell her firmly to never do it again, and that she should be speaking with the neighbour who is obstructing her driveway. If that neighbour is truly obstructing her access, then she can get them towed, or keep reporting them to the council until they finally get it stopped.

As for the fence, I'd be keeping that in place, good fences make good neighbours, and if it gets removed, there'll be nothing to stop them parking over the boundary, leaving you little room to park/get in/out.

It's the neighbours husband who's obstructing their own driveway. There isn't room for his van but he parks up anyway.

ThoughtsOnLife · 29/01/2026 00:37

It is not about a few centimetres of concrete. Its about entitled people using the property of others when they have been asked not to. The broader picture is leaving it as is opens up a potential right of acess to the op's drive by the NDN.

tamade · 29/01/2026 00:53

Ask yourself, can you live with it?

Really the problem, if problem there be, is being caused by the NDB1N. So if you can't live with it you and NDN could form a posse and go over to see them, put the frighteners on them, sounds like her DP has a van so probably a bit of rough; take him.

WorkingMum90 · 29/01/2026 00:57

People driving on driveways? Whatever next!

You should probably start parking on the road OP, that'll help reduce the wear and tear...

Be sure to invoice the postman and delivery people every time they have the cheek to walk across it too!

😂🤣

nomas · 29/01/2026 01:01

9champions · 28/01/2026 22:34

Thanks! I know I asked if I was being unreasonable, and I get that everyone is different - some things bother some people more than others. But honestly, I find it hard to believe all those people saying it wouldn’t bother them at all, especially if their neighbours haven’t been helpful or accommodating in the past.

Anyway, the bins are sitting at the top of the drive, and she’s not home right now. There’s no way she can squeeze through that gap without shifting them, so we’ll just have to wait and see what happens!

Well done, OP.

The amount of people not comprehending your excellent diagram is bizarre.

Also note the people who called you petty don’t bother commenting on your neighbour’s behaviour to you.

nomas · 29/01/2026 01:02

tamade · 29/01/2026 00:53

Ask yourself, can you live with it?

Really the problem, if problem there be, is being caused by the NDB1N. So if you can't live with it you and NDN could form a posse and go over to see them, put the frighteners on them, sounds like her DP has a van so probably a bit of rough; take him.

That is not OP’s job.

nomas · 29/01/2026 01:03

NorthXNorthWest · 28/01/2026 23:40

So why aren't you both off busying yourselves with more important matters?

Exactly.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 29/01/2026 01:04

JustCabbaggeLooking · 29/01/2026 00:24

It's the neighbours husband who's obstructing their own driveway. There isn't room for his van but he parks up anyway.

Oh yeah, sorry. Then she'll need to get her partner to park elsewhere! She's cheeky driving over OP's drive. It would piss me right off.

SnowyRock · 29/01/2026 01:07

HelplessSoul · 28/01/2026 18:52

They are taking the fucking piss.

Block access with planters. Much cheaper than a fence.

Also, strategically place your bins where she crosses your drive / park your car there so she cant cut across.

Your NDN is a fucking cunt of the highest order.

Why? Shes driving over it not parking on it. I wouldnt have an issue with a next door neighbour doing that?

ThisChirpyFox · 29/01/2026 01:19

Oh wow! All the posters having a go at op making sparky comments like her not being neighbourly or being very blessed if she's sees this as a problem, I hope you're getting walked over by your neighbours or neighbours just walking into or on your property as and when.

As this is exactly what's happening here. The woman's a cheeky cow. First off, it's not your fault she can't get on her drive, they should speak to their other neighbour. Secondly, once you made her aware you knew of this she should have either asked if she could drive over it and if you said no, accepted it. Why should it be okay for someone to drive over a drive you've paid thousands for if you do not give permission? I hope the bin blocked her path but would like updates on if she moved it op. Also when your drive was getting done, I think she parked outside yours and left her drive empty so you couldn't. She knew exactly what she was doing so ignore the nonsense scenarios people have come up with.

Also I agree with planters. Place a number of big heavy pots spread out along the edge.

ThisChirpyFox · 29/01/2026 01:20

SnowyRock · 29/01/2026 01:07

Why? Shes driving over it not parking on it. I wouldnt have an issue with a next door neighbour doing that?

But that's you and op has every right to have a problem with it.

tamade · 29/01/2026 02:06

nomas · 29/01/2026 01:02

That is not OP’s job.

🛫ok

Monty27 · 29/01/2026 02:13

Omg people use mine to do a 3 point. I'm the first house in a cul-de-sac. If I catch them I literally tell them to get off my property as they are trespassing 😡
They're random people though not neighbours. Mine wouldn't dream of doing it.
Call them out tell them its not a public road!

LivingTheDreamish · 29/01/2026 02:26

I would feel the same as you OP. The proof that you are not being petty is that you didn't care about her driving on your old drive. It is purely because of the wear and tear on your new drive that it is now an issue.

Hopefully planters will solve the problem.

tuvamoodyson · 29/01/2026 03:42

9champions · 28/01/2026 19:42

Thank you

Don't you think it would be neighbourly to ask first instead of just assuming it's okay though? My response might have been different tbh. I mean, good manners don't cost anything.

So if she’d asked, your answer might have been different? What the wear and tear on your driveway that you’re concerned about though? Wouldn’t that still be the same?

Bobbie12345678 · 29/01/2026 04:00

I wonder why they don’t park their van in the drive and the (presumably shorter) car in the on road space.

HelplessSoul · 29/01/2026 04:40

SnowyRock · 29/01/2026 01:07

Why? Shes driving over it not parking on it. I wouldnt have an issue with a next door neighbour doing that?

Thats good for you I guess.

But the OP has an issue with it given that its her driveway that she paid for.

Shame you cant see that 🤷‍♂️

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