Second thoughts about nursery

[MyNoisyShark]

I speak to a woman at nursery (won't say how I know her) and she's trashed the nursery.

Said they aren't applying the excema cream twice whilst her child is at nursery (it's four times a day).

The staff don't care that the children climb on furniture etc - feet should be on the floor.

They won't put in an autism/ADHD referral (she has been diagnosed with autism via one session).

Now I'm stressing. I don't pick up until a few mins before they close due to work and it's a council nursery so I feel they do follow the rules.

Aibu?

By the way I have never had an issue and find everything is by the book. Manager is also been really kind and I've had no issue with the staff.

I wouldn't make any decisions based on the judgement of one other person, depending on who they are and how well you know them. I'd look at how your children are and how you find the staff yourself.

I just don't understand if she's making up lies as her experience is so different to mine. Surely if you have to put on cream X times a day, you do it?

Doesn't anyone check these nuseries

Well yeah, OFSTED do?

You're not really making much sense.

But 'trashed the nursery', do you mean she's unhappy with them and has offloaded her feelings onto you?

If so, I can't see a problem with her having a different opinion of it.

If you're happy with the care provided, don't give it another thought.

I think it's pretty serious not giving medication or not doing autism referrals

Does your child need medication or an autism referral?

If the answer is no, then stop stressing.

Name me one business or service in the world where absolutely everyone is happy with it.

You can't, can you?

My child has medication yes.

I wouldn't know if they need an autism assessment, I'm not autistic or trained.

Autism referrals in nursery are really quite rare, there’s usually lots they will try and put in place first unless it’s really blindingly obvious the child has autism. It’s also highly unlikely a nursery age child was ‘diagnosed in one session’ unless they went private.

Oh well, pull your child out immediately.

And send them to a nursery that no other parent complains about at any time for any reason.

Good luck.

The mum was, as an adult I think

If you are happy with the nursery for your child I don’t see the issue

You make very little sense.

Exactly what I thought!

Sorry ladies so just hop of the thread

Its okay to be a concerned mother. I think children are children, they are naturally very needy and playful.

If you’re happy with the nursery then what’s the issue?
You are always going to get people who view things differently to you or have different expectations but you just need to make up your own mind.

Just wait until your child goes to school and you’re added to a class WhatsApp! If you listened to some of the parents on ours you’d think the school needed closing down. Yet it’s a fantastic place.

Trust your own judgment.

Isn’t nursery age quite young for autism/ADHD diagnosis? Maybe nursery don’t see any signs of either? I would take what your friend said with a pinch of salt and rely on your own experience of the nursery.
Also if it’s council run they will be inspected
so you should be able to get a copy of the most recent report

Inspected by who?

They have sen provisions and some children are diagnosed that age. She has autism and ADHD, awaiting the second diagnosis. I think she said they've been told he has some traits.

It’s not that rare - out of a cohort of 30, we usually put forward about 2-3 referrals for social communication/ASD a year and those are the ones who don’t already have a diagnosis, which is usually another 3-4 children.

Who has diagnosed your DC with autism and ADHD? I don’t understand what you mean by awaiting second diagnosis? ADHD isn’t usually assessed until age 6. Why would you need a referral though if she’s already diagnosed?

I voted YABU because I'm not sure what your issue is. You're happy with the care your child is receiving but someone else isn't.

Said they aren't applying the eczema cream twice whilst her child is at nursery (it's four times a day).

How does she know?

The staff don't care that the children climb on furniture etc - feet should be on the floor.

Again, how does she know? My son climbs up on the lunch bag trolley at every single pick up. Staff and I always tell him no and get him down. He doesn't listen because he's 2 and a half. It doesn't mean that they or I "don't care".

They won't put in an autism/ADHD referral (she has been diagnosed with autism via one session).

What do you mean "won't"? Refusing to do it at all? Refusing to do it before X date or Y criteria have been met?

As other posters have said, it's unusual to get a diagnosis this young. A lot of "traits" are just normal toddler behaviours.

Deleted as double posted.

I think youve misunderstood