To ask if your brother/brothers had to help round the house when you were growing up?ere

[Netcurtainnelly]

My sisters and I used to do some vacumming at weekends and also had to set the table and clear the table after meals growing up Understandable.

I never remember my brother having to do anything. It was just us.
I feel it was because he was a boy.
Thinking about it, it really annoys me.
Im sure if my parents were still alive I would mention it and ask?

Was it the same for anyone else?
If it was, and your parent/s are alive would you consider asking them?

Its really wrong. He seemed to get out of everything.
Come to think of it as an adult, Ive never seen him wash or dry up or anything to help when we were both at parents.
Im sure Ive never seen him cook, wash up at all actually even as an independent adult.

It was also everyone but him that did chores.

AiBU to think my parents should have made him.
Tell me about your brothers and chores.
Was this normal?

We all did chores. No one got out of it.

I have boys and girls, again no one gets out of it. We all live here so all chip in.

Two brothers here and I was the only girl.
I had to help cook, clean, laundry and ironing, they did nothing.
They could have girlfriends over to sleep in the same rooms. This was not applied to me and my boyfriends.
Boys could eat unchecked, whereas my in take was monitored and I was reminded about gaining weight and "ballooning" if I ever asked for seconds.
As an adult I have to remind DM that men should be expected to contribute equally to childcare and house hold chores equally.
Such backwards views.
Written down it reads much worse than it felt at the time, I just accepted it.

My brother and I both did everything around the house. Washing dishes, laundry, vacuuming, dusting, deep cleaning, light cooking, animal care, we were both expected to be doing it.

My mom did the mowing because she liked to.

My brother sister and I all did chores and shared the animal care growing up in the 1970s.

In the winter for example we'd come home from school and one of us would go round drawing all the curtains to keep the heat in while another filled the coal skuttles and the third set the table and helped prep dinner.

DM didn't do dishes because she did more cooking. DF , DS DB and I all shared the washing up.

From about the age of 10 DB,DS and I took it in turns to make Saturday lunch because Mum worked mornings 6 days a week. Dad always cooked Sunday lunch and we all took it in turns to do Sunday tea.

We were all responsible for our own rooms, and during school holidays we had a chore rota with cleaning jobs on it that rotated around so we took it in turns to clean the bathroom, hoover , clean the brass or whatever was on the list for that week. Mum and dad did most, but we each had something to do as our contribution to family life.

Extra pocket money could be earned for doing other more onerous jobs too like washing the car, helping dig the allotment or helping with the ironing.

My parents never seemed to divide jobs by sex or gender. They both did everything if required and brought us up to do the same.

No I don't think so. I'm pretty sure we were all expected to help. things got easier when my parents there first dishwasher and eventually they inherited enough that they employed cleaners. I definitely remember my Mum taught my brother to iron a shirt and later on he married someone who 100% expected him to do half the cleaning.

My dad has been known to get the hoover out on Christmas day and he does quite a bit of cooking sunday roasts and weekday meals - always red meat which my mum isn't keen on but she's happy to let him crack on with the cooking.

My mum specifically and regularly told me growing up that girls do cooking and cleaning and boys do DIY, put up the tent etc, although she never delegated any tasks to me. She taught me to cook, sew and iron (but didn't teach my brother) but other than cooking occasionally (I could / would cook a roast dinner single handedly from about age 12) I was never expected to do much other than lay the table and help clear. She also said that when dishing up/serving food to always serve the men first. To be fair she's 75 and a) not British born and b) was raised by her grandmother instead of her mother, so was presumably raised herself on the values from her grandmother's generation rather than the one immediately above. DH on the other hand - neither himself nor his sister were ever expected to do any chores at all, so fending for himself come university was an education in more ways than one...

Not so much cleaning, he went to the shops all the time for DM and babysat, yes, he was helpful.
1 boy, 4 girls, he is the eldest.

We all had to pull.our weight with the same chores on a rota basis and we were all born in the 60s. Having said that both my dad and his father(born in 1898) were perfectly comfortable doing the ironing and washing up or helping prepare dinner, so.males doing jobs in the house wasn't anything unusual.

Yes my younger brother did nothing, I asked my mum and she said “he’s a boy”’! Even though I did cleaning ironing and cooking, not all of it. And the odd thing was that my dad used to cook.

Late 80’s early 90’s it was me and brother as teens and we did the equal amount of chores, cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, you name it, we did it. Both our parents worked. My dad sometimes was on nights. Mum was out from 8-6. The mornings at half term were spent doing jobs.

They did but more of the burden and expectation was on me as the only girl. Not only was I given more to do but I was also expected from a young age to know what needed doing before I was asked. My Brothers (one older one younger) would be praised for bringing down dirty plates from their rooms or dirty washing and were practically worshiped if they washed their own cups and plates. If I did that I'd have been admonished for not washing any other cutlery, cups or plates in the house that were unwashed, or if I didn't put them away and so on. I was often asked to prep meals before my parents got home form work and if I wasn't finished and tidied up by the time my mother got home she'd call me selfish for making her come home to a mess. This was even though she knew I had Music practice after school a few days a week.

Same goes for putting on washings, putting washings away, hoovering, dusting, going to the shops. It was always me. My parents would say " we expect more of you" as if it was an honour I had to live up to.

I grew up in the 80's and 90's and I'd say this attitude must have been standard given my experience of men my own age as flatmates or dating.

I’ve got an older sister and a younger brother and my brother wasn’t expected to do anything at all. We were always told it was because he was a boy if we asked. He was very mollycoddled by my mother.

We moved when I was 7, but I can remember being in the house before that drying the dishes after dinner at night. Once we’d moved my sister and I took it in turns to dry the dishes or do the packed lunches for the next day, My mother never made us breakfast once we started secondary school because we were old enough to do our own, but she was still making his when he started work.

My parents had their own business so would often work late, either me or my sister would have to cook the tea. In the holidays we’d be expected to clean the whole house and do the laundry while he sat around like Lord Muck.

I’ve got 2 sons, they absolutely were not brought up like that. Having a penis does not stop anyone pulling their weight at home.

Both me and my brother were asked to do the same chores (dishes, making beds, some cleaning, taking the rubbish out) and we were both whining about it. I guess I was a bit more compliant so did more. But I can't blame my mum, she tried with both of us. DB is still useless around the house as an adult.

What about sons and daughters helping today?

I hope nobody gets off because they are a male.

Yes. Fucked me off big time. I STILL resent it and I’m 70+. I hated my brother for years because of this. Not really his fault.

6 siblings in the 60/70s. 3 girls 3 boys, I was the oldest (girl). When mum started working full time, it was the girls that were expected to help out - I remember mum coming home from work and being angry if the house was a tip. The boys seem to get away with a lot

However we are all in our 60s now, and they all contribute in their own home. I can't get too worked up about how it was then, my children's relationships are all different and all the males contribute - which is they way it should be.

Rarely, I have two sisters one brother, he occasionally washed up when nagged/and even more occasionally mowed the grass. He never had to do anything else apart from make his own bed and keep his room tidy which he did. He got more pocket money than us too.
Us three girls were made to do everything from a young age including chores for my gran at her house, gardening, shopping etc as both parents worked full time and OP we had the same excuse trotted out whenever we complained about fairness "because he's a boy" He was " mummy's special little soldier" and a bit of a bully towards us but he could do no wrong in her eyes & he always got his own way. I so wish my dad had spoken up more. I love my brother now but he was a lazy pig for many years.
It was very unfair at the time but I'm glad I can fend for myself so I suppose I'm kind of grateful in a way.

My older brother and I had to wash up and dry the dishes after dinner and keep our rooms tidy. Whenever we were not at school we were sent into the garden to pick vegetables such as runner beans. We also had to dig up potatoes and then wash and peel them. He got a paper round at 13 so DM said as he was having to get up early he wouldn't have to do any chores. I also had to vacuum and dust through the downstairs, prepare dinner on Saturdays and help with Sunday lunch. My Dad would have considered it women's work.

Me and 4 older brothers - we all had to do housework and had a pretty fair chore rota but when my oldest brothers moved out and it was just me, parents, and one brother, then when mum was away I was expected to do all the cooking. But dad was helpless in the kitchen back then and I was definitely the better choice out of me and my brother but still, but sexist. (Said brother now does the majority of cooking for his family so he learnt eventually)

Chires were split. I recall my brother having to do as much as me. My uncles kften doing the dishes if they had been cooked for at grandmas house. It was just expected everyone chipped in.

In my Paternal grandparents house my grandma did it all. Should be said there they were farmers so grandad had been doing the farm. When they retired it just remained this way.

We both had to do the washing up and jobs like washing the car. But I think my mother taught me practical things like how to use the washing machine or things like how to clean around taps, etc. I don’t think she taught my brother these things. This was partly because I was happy to learn and used to follow her around the house, and he was around and available far less than I was.

Yes there was no difference between what me, my brothers and sisters had to do. Likewise here sons and and daughters treated the same.

We didn't have set chores or responsibilities growing up but we did do help around the house as things needed doing (food shopping, tidying, cleaning, washing up, ironing, cooking, fixing things, washing the car, looking after pets). We did about the same but my brother would usually do the harder stuff. I think it helped that my dad was also very hands on at home, he probably did more cleaning than my mum.
I never bothered giving my own children jobs to do at home but both DD and DS help around the house without prompting.

Yes.

He was 4 years older than me, so probably did bits before I remember, and then left when I was 12 so I can't compare our teens.

I do remember I washed & he dried & put away after meals (I preferred washing up to drying).

The OP seems to be focusing only in indoor household chores. My brother was the eldest, then 2 younger girls. He didn't have to cook but he was expected to do heavy lifting of shopping, get coal in from the bunker outside and he also had to clean all the shoes and help Dad with the gardening and car maintenance. I actually think the dusting and vacuuming that my sister and I did was actually lighter and easier.