AIBU for thinking my partner is being unfair

[blueyavocado]

To provide a little context I live with my partner and 2 year old son, my partner is a stay at home dad at the moment and in doing a health care masters degree, which involves lengthy placements. I’m currently writing a 8000 word dissertation.

Anyway cut a long story short , I’m very tired , my son wakes at 5am and in the night, I’m busy in the evening cooking, cleaning and looking after our soon, then up late doing my work. My partner has never got up at 5am with our son and quite happily lays in until 10am even if I ask him to wake up. He doesn’t let me have the same lay in and insists I have it with our son at his nap time. If I do try and wake DP he gets very moody. he then moans because he’s tried and always says it’s absolutely exhausting looking after our son , which I know .

But he’s only been looking after him 10am -2pm most days on his own and the rest of my work I’ve been staying up late to do. He moans that he finds caring for our son exhausting , so I said why not get a job then and we take our son nursery, but he doesn’t want to start working until our son is 3 .

anyway little rant , AIBU for being annoyed ? I feel like he’s being really lazy

He needs to get a job. He’s taking the piss out of you.

You are not important to him.

Why are you with this man? You need to lay down the law a bit more. He pulls his weight or he’s out.

What was he like before you had your dc?

I hope youre using very strong birth control, although to be honest, my fanny would be like the Sahara with a lazy wander in the house.

Good grief, what a depressing thread. Why in earth are you pandering to this lazy, pathetic prat?
Thread after tread I see women putting up with this absolute shit. Idle fuckers doing less than the bare minimum while moaning the entire time about how hard done by they are.

Just how low would the bar have to get before you decided to put a stop to it OP?

AIBU for thinking my partner is being unfair

Do you really need us to answer this for you? I think you know the answer.

There’s 24 hours in a day and he’s looking after him for 4. Definitely lazy twat.

Did he work when you met him, is he intending on going to work again

If he's not working and you are, he should be doing all child care during the week as well as the cooking, cleaning, life admin etc. He's just lazy and you're a doormat.

If he’s your partner not your husband then you owe him nothing financially. Work out what help you would get if single by using a benefits calculator and see what it’s costing you to keep him.

I’m 27, he’s 32 , because the job centre said he doesn’t have to if he is the primary carer

Pretty much summed it up x

Just to join the defeaning chorus of pp's - he's NOT a SAHD! He's a lazy fuck.. I couldn't stay with someone like that and I hope you realise, you're doing it all anyway so could easily crack on without him too!

He's doing Health Care? The irony. I bet hes planning on going into management rather than actual hands on caring. Anyway-you having an infestation of cocklodger. Hopefully this is your property and you can kick the lazy fucker out.

How can he be the primary carer if he only provides care for four hours per day op?
He either gets a job outside the house or he actually does the role of and hours of a SAHD.

This man isn't a partner, he is a drain, leeching off you and using your son as an excuse to be lazy and feckless.

He really sounds like a lazy ass he can either step up and do what a stay at home parent would do cooking cleaning and everything else all childcare or he can get a job he sounds self entitled as fuck he simply wants a Easy life

🤢 He's disgustingly lazy! What a twat!

Agreed! It's so frustrating to hear about people like this who are funded to live easy lives through hard working working people's taxes!

First post nails it.

Why oh why do women put up with this shit.

Do you work OP?

When did he last work?

I'd be sending this one back to wherever you found him.

Hes not a stay at home dad hes a lazy bastard, tell him time to get off his arse and get a job.

I was working but on mat leave then started my masters when my son was 6 months old , he quit his job just before then as he hated it

Get out of this now while you’re still young. He will bleed you dry, emotionally and financially.
Dont regret wasting your life on this person you can make it on your own

"Stay at home dad"

Lolz.

Get rid of this lazy twat youre pretty much managing on your own anyway.

Grow a back bone and stand up for yourself. If he doesn’t want to get a job until your son is 3 then he needs to actually step up and be the main carer. He doesn’t get to not work and not parents.

The laziness would be such a turn off for me.

Please don’t have anymore children with this man. You’ll end up doing everything for everyone with a bone idle manchild added to your list of responsibilities.