Help with social services and CFA.

[TrishyLou1111]

My 17 year old daughter was sexually abused by a male in november 2025.
She was living with her nan at the time it happened and returned home a week later.
I immediately called the police and my DD stated she wanted to press charges. Legalities began and she did a video interview ect. Bail conditions put in place for this young man and investigation still ongoing.

I have 4 other children and I am currently pregnant. My question, why are social services doing a children's and families assessment? They've checked bedrooms, contacted schools etc etc, im obviously not concerned but I feel as though ive done something wrong? Like im the perpetrator.

Is this standard procedure? Or AIBU and completely stressed for no reason?

This. I appreciate it’s unsettling but it is necessary as part of their safeguarding checks, they would far rather assess 100 families and find 100 totally happy and safe families than reduce the checks and miss 1 who really needed support and intervention. If all is fine you have nothing to worry about x

It’s the same as having a disabled child. Our child was classed as Child in Need, only due to disability- not our parenting. However, for all those years, social services also kept an eye on the siblings to make sure they weren’t negatively affected.

I know it’s easy to say, but try not to worry. Just concentrate on supporting your daughter. How awful for her.

Absolutely, my daughter was in my ex-husband’s care when she presented at hospital and she couldn’t answer what was actually wrong with her other than to say that it was all my fault
We never did find out what actually the issue was but of course ex-husband was very keen to continue that narrative and I played into his hands by going bloody bananas at him.
Not the child
So then, of course social Services wanted to speak to her when she was discharged back into my care - voluntarily, but with an undertone of if you don’t do this, they’ll be trouble. And that’s where I went wrong. I should’ve just said no because it escalated.
And that then met the threshold when we got to court to discuss Residency for them to instructor section 7 report.
I listened to all of the advice from Mumsnet and everywhere else about how if you’ve got nothing to hide you’ve got nothing to fear
It’s not true if they can’t find anything to put in the report they will literally make shit up
Or make stupid ridiculous comments like your bathroom is too small
The other thing they commented on was mother turned up to the meeting wearing gym wear and carrying a green protein shake. We must monitor the children’s weight going forward.
This was from a social worker who literally must’ve been a size 24. She couldn’t even bend down to get on and off my sofa without doing a forward role. She was so fat.
Naturally, I didn’t dare mention that at any stage of proceedings, You’d like to think the judge has a pair of eyes and could work it out for themselves
No such luck

A CFA is a consent based assessment. This should have been explained to you and you should have signed a consent form for the SW to talk to the school, GP and any other professional.

The assessment itself will look at what support can be offered to your daughter. From what you have said it is likely the outcome will be universal services support and no further intervention from CSC. It’s a useful assessment if you wish to access services in the future. You mentioned you had a child with SEN, they may also be entitled to support through short breaks.

why has your Dd Been told not to go back to college she is victim??

It's standard, don't worry about it. They will want to provide support and the starting point is doing a full child and family assessment. Every child children's social care come in to contact with will have the same standard assessment, which includes checking bedrooms and talking to the children alone, it doesn't automatically mean that they have concerns about your ability to keep them safe.

They need to be certain that she (and the other children) aren't continuing to be at risk due to family dynamics/boundaries/etc. If they didn't do that, it's absolutely possible, as they know from experience, that a child who has been assaulted could be returning to another unsafe environment.

And whilst I appreciate it's not pleasant for you, it's your daughter who has been violated, not you in having people trying to make sure she is safe.

Have you asked the social worker to explain it to you? She will be able to answer this much better than a bunch of randoms on the internet

Not really. A social work assessment isn't a par for the course process at all. It's only done when the threshold of likelihood of harm has been met.

You know you don't have to consent to any of this, right? You must have signed a consent form for her to contact the schools - why did you do that?

Social workers don't do assessments because 'too many children'

I ain't signed a god damn thing

Yes! You should have been asked for your consent in the first place. Did that not happen?

Seriously? Then first thing tomorrow get on the phone to the social worker and have a conversation. They need your consent to complete a CFA full stop and within that they need your signed consent to discuss your family with other agencies. You don't have to consent to this. Unless they have decided the threshold for child protection is met but it doesn't sound like that's the case at all.

Of course I have. And a bunch of randoms on the Internet have given me valuable advice.

I will do. I honestly feel like a thick twat. Never been in this situation in my life so thought it was mandatory

Noooooo this is a load of bollocks and really irresponsible. There is no 'warrant' 🙄 it would be a section 47 but they have to have a reason to believe the children are at risk of significant harm to do this. They can't do a section 47 just because a parent doesn't consent to a CFA. That's just not how it works.

You're not thick at all. Why would you know? The social worker is responsible for explaining the process and obtaining your consent. It's awful if they have done neither properly!

Isn’t that rape op? I feel the term sexual assualf down plays it. You said he penetrated her, which means she was raped.

this is outrageous. I would be challenging it strongly. He should have his life restricted until it is all over

It's not standard practice and it shouldn't be done if it's not needed and if OP hasn't consented.

No this isn't correct. Fishing around for evidence of neglect with no actual reason to do so isn't social services practice and it's not ok. If the only concern is the girl being sexually assaulted then there is no reason for social services to assess the rest of the family.

This is not correct. If the only concern is the daughter being sexually assaulted outside of the home then they have no reason to start looking for other issues with no evidence!

Surely they must assess the home in which any child under their remit resides? Ie who else lives there etc. they're not 'trying to find neglect'. They're painting an accurate picture of the child's day to day living situation.

I don't see how they could not do that? Lots of others are saying it's normal practice?

A child's already been harmed, it's past the point of social services needing consent to contact other services.