To go to the concert alone

[daugtherwantsashop]

I like a particular kind of music that isn’t to everyone’s taste. When I was younger, I went to lots of local gigs in my home country, but I couldn’t afford to travel far or buy tickets for big bands. Then life got in the way.
I’ve been living in the UK for nearly 18 years, and during that time I didn’t think much about concerts, or even about music, compared to before. Then, about three years ago, a friend asked me to go to a huge concert — think of a very popular band. I had the time of my life.
Since then, I’ve been to four more big concerts. My husband has patiently come along with me, even though it’s not really his thing. Most concerts are in London, and the journey is long: it takes us about 3.5 hours to get to Cockfosters station, then about another hour to reach whichever venue we are goingto. We also have older electric cars that need charging twice on the way, which makes the trip even longer.
Now I want to see two bands performing together in London in a coupleofmonths. My husband has said he’s had enough, he doesn’t like the music and doesn’t really want to keep taking two days off work for this. That’s fair enough.
So my question is… would you go alone? I’m terrified of driving back on my own and also worried about getting from the venue to a hotel. I’m in my late 40s, if that makes any difference. Thank you for giving me some perspective 😊

Yes I’d do it on my own though to be honest I probably wouldn’t do a standing venue alone, I’m more comfortable with a seat if not with dh (unless local pub then I’ll know half the people there anyway). I would opt for public transport as I hate driving long distances unless it’s essential, National express often stops near venues meaning no overnight stay needed (if im
honest, the overnight in a hotel would worry me more than the gig because it’s not something I’ve done much). You could also go onto fan sites and find a gig buddy, or we have a town gig buddy scheme, lots of people don’t have anyone to go with.

@daugtherwantsashopGo. Life's too short not to take opportunities like this. I am a little older than you and unexpectedly find myself on my own after 30-odd years with my late DH. I have a number of gigs and theatre trips lined up for this coming year which I will go to alone. Take sensible precautions and enjoy yourself.

I have anxiety but I still go by myself I’d rather that than be with someone who doesn’t even want to be there. I book a premier inn for the night and let my hair down

most people actually do go by themselves

i travel from Suffolk to London each time and even used the tube by myself (lived in London 36 years) and had never had the confidence to use it

I’ve just turned 43 I went to see Marilyn Manson twice last year no way was I going to miss out on it just because I had to go by myself

I go to gigs alone sometimes, as does my DH (because some of the music he likes is tedious and i think it takes away from his fun if i am doomscrolling during the twaddly endless guitar solos)

But do you always have to go to big gigs? in London?

I’m sixty and go abroad on holidays on my own.

No need to worry. Make a plan and enjoy yourself.

I do it every year for one of the Proms Concerts.Absolutely no problem! I find somewhere to stay in Kensington close to the RAH so don't need to go wandering off too far .I arrive in London in time to check in.I then go for a shop/wander/something to eat,then return to the Hotel to rest and change before going to the concert.Afterwards,I'm generally too tired to do anything but return to my hotel and I have a lovely long undisturbed sleep on my own before catching the train home next morning.It's a real treat!😁

I've been to concerts on my own in the past, and know of lots of other people who have done the same.

Alternatively there are some great charities who pair up concert go-ers with disabled people so that they can have some support to access live music - Gig Buddies is a London-based one.

https://gigbuddies.org.uk/

I often go alone to events and theatre in London, and stay in a hotel. The Tube is often busier than during the day.
I also went to an event once that overran until about 1am, so there were no Tube or DLR trains running - I just walked into a nearby hotel and asked them to call me a cab to the hotel where I was booked 😂 It was all very straightforward.
OP, you're an adult with a phone and a credit card..... just go and enjoy yourself!

My husbands a dance/techno weirdo, me rock. He usually comes with me to my favourite bands gigs as its a chance for a VERY rare night away from the dc, but he knows I'd go without him otherwise.

We're in Scotland and the gigs are always either London or Manchester, both a pain in the arse to get to. I always pick a hotel very close to the gig.

We booked the Premier Inn the next underground stop up from the most recent gig in London, guess who else was staying at the hotel and who we had a beer or several with after? Yes, the band. I about peed my pants with excitement, I'm 39 ffs 😂

Absolutely, there bid actually nothing better to build your self esteem and self reliance than to do things on you own. There is no one to question your choices. It doesn’t matter what happens (or what mistakes you make), it’s all about what you do about it. Be prepared, know where you are going and how best to get there. Tube stations are remarkably close together especially inside the circle line, it’s often just as good or even better to walk.

Dont not go to something you would enjoy only because you don’t know anyone interested or have to ‘drag someone along’. Go. Be prepared, and able to respond to whatever happens.

The people attending will be your tribe. Enjoy. Xx

You could always drive and park near to the venue - there is a lot of free or cheap parking in London at night. I go to gigs/theatre alone and it’s great to just get in my car and drive straight home afterwards. I live in an outer London borough now.

@daugtherwantsashopI would go with you, just for the dwarf metal, but am already booked to go to a gig that night

Too far to drive home but I could drive to a nearby hotel. The venue is Wembley arena I believe there's plenty of pre bookable parking nearby

Next time... sonata artica and beast in black in October

There is but it can be an absolute bastard getting out of the car parks afterwards so I’d do some research first. Loads of hotels in the Wembley area too, and it’s very busy after events so no worries about safety.

Can you not get a hotel close to Wembley and depending on how close walk or get an uber? No need to get the tube.

Meetup isn't for specific events though is it? I thought it was more groups for types of events?

You wouldn't want to drive around Wembley after a concert, we went to see Coldplay in September and even leaving 15 minutes before the end it was absolute carnage in the streets around it. I'd book one of the hotels on site and use the parking overnight if I was going alone.

Oh god definitely go! I go to gigs alone pretty often, and I drive the length of the country (like 9-10 hours one way) for sporting events. It’s good for you.

Metal crowds are the BEST. You will get talking to nice people, I always do.

I've gone to plenty of concerts alone. It's often better than having to plan around others. Hotel afterwards is the best option as you don't have to concentrate on driving when tired or worry about trains being cancelled. As @BoarBrush says book a hotel a stop or a few stops along from the venue, that's very near the tube station itself. There will be loads of people also taking the tube and that'll keep it safe.

I find it weird you're okay going to a gig alone and driving into London but going to a hotel after is the bit that scares you!

but depending on where the gig is then if you prefer to drive somewhere rather than getting the tube just drive a few miles out of London and stay in the nearest travelodge/premier inn with parking. Or if it's somewhere central there will probably be air bnbs or hotels within walking distance so you don't have to worry about the tube.

Bought the ticket! Thank you so much everyone for encouraging me 😍still not sure how I'll do the rest but I have secured my ticket, can't wait 😊

@daugtherwantsashop not sure which direction you are driving from. My advice is find a hotel with parking near a tube station e.g. Stanmore.