To feel so lonely

[AngelWingsS]

Sorry if this sounds negative, but I’ve been feeling really lonely lately. I’m finding it hard waking up every day feeling low and wishing I had more love and support around me.
Single mum life is hard, and it’s not how I thought things would turn out, I still feel a lot of resentment towards my ex, which I know I need to work through. I also worry that I won’t meet anyone now and end up feeling quite unlovable.
It feels like everyone around me has found their person, and that’s tough to deal with. Has anyone else felt like this?

Who do you have around you for support? Feeling lonely is miserable but reaching out for help is a great move.

Life can be so hard and especially at this time of year. But that genuinely can change. Feeling strong as a single person will make you feel better than simply have a partner.

Talk to people about how you are feeling and if there’s no one around and you are feeling really low call the Samaritans on 116123, many of our callers are lonely, it’s unfortunately so common.

Take care

?

She means there are many, many people in your shoes on here.

It doesnt read like that at all

Hi OP
Single parenthood is hard but you must learn to love yourself before considering another relationship.
Also, not everything is as it seems. There are lots of unhappy people in relationships who aren't able to leave for a variety of reasons.
I raised my son alone and know how crushingly lonely it can be but having another relationship isn't always the right answer or a priority.
Please take care of yourself OP.
Small steps, moment by moment.
Embrace yourself and celebrate you

There have been about twenty posts saying identical things to yours over the last week alone, OP.

When I separated from my partner, I certainly felt like I will never meet someone again. Well, that turned out not to be true but that's another story.

What helped me massively in the initial stages was to get out of the house as much as possible. I basically had something organised every day for about three months before I was actually able to stay home for the evening and not go crazy. I looked for social hobbies and my thing is sports so I signed up to a local CrossFit gym (great activity to meet some people, even if you have never held a barbell in your hands before) and pole class (amazing for self-confidence and a lovely girly support network).
I also set up a weekly video chat with my best friend. We couldn't meet regularly but we could join each other virtually on Monday nights and have a glass of wine and a chat after kids were in bed.

You need people around you.

Thank you I do love myself though, ive spent years loving myself but it doesnt replace the feelings.

Hi op. I’m not a single mum but I share your feelings of loneliness. I have a very loving partner but other than that I don’t have any friends or close family apart from my mum. It feels extremely isolating. I have autism so struggle to maintain friendships but when you’re an adult it’s so hard to get yourself out there to meet new people I find. You’re definitely not alone

Ok well i apologise for not seeing them, ive only seen a thread about how great it is to be single .

Thank you but its not a recent break up sorry if it sounded that way.

Sending you love @AngelWingsS. You'll find someone when you're not looking. I'm wishing you beautiful abundance. I'm praying for your gains. Don't worry. Be choosy. When it comes to Men, my advice is if a Man's mind is right his world will be right. Spot the red flags early. People will tell you who they are. Believe them. 2026 is going to be your year! I'm celebrating for you already.

I have never looked, i have been single for years. Ive never been on any dating apps or anything like that.

@AngelWingsS what do you think needs to change to change the outcome? Agreed, dating sites are full of reprobates.

I’m not actively able to date I have my children full time so that would be impossible anyway.

Timing doesn't really matter. The strategy is still the same - get out, lean on people around you, set up a routine which nourishes your soul, build your confidence with new experiences and activities...

I don’t want to burden people, they all have families and are loved up they don’t want to hear my negativity.

So find an appropriate place to explore your negative beliefs about yourself. Even if you have to cut back elsewhere, find the money and time for therapy with someone good, and really work at it. That will give you a safe place to trauma dump and work on yourself.

I’ve been using chat GPT which has been helpful

I am going to challenge that gently. If a friend came to you for a shoulder to cry on, would you think "oh god, not them again with all their negativity!". I bet not. So why do you think people aren't willing to support you?
Obviously, you don't want to keep going on and on for months on end. But to talk to someone is perfectly fine and most people will be all too willing to help.
Besides, spending time with people doesn't necessarily mean always talking about problems. I am sure there is plenty of value you bring to a friendship.

honestly I probably would actually it can be draining sometimes listening to the same thing over and over again. Even friends and family have their limits, most people ime want to hear positive and happy things.

But are you regularly trauma-dumping on your friends about the same thing?

Sorry No I’m not i can’t see where I’ve said that? I said I no longer speak to them about it as I know it can be difficult for others to hear the same things over and over, i did in the early days as that would be normal of course but I don’t want to burden people with it anymore so it’s not something I do now.

No, you didn’t say that. But you said ‘it can be draining listening to the same thing over and over’. Which is why I suggested you find the money and make time for therapy, where you don’t need to worry about ‘burdening’ someone with negativity. It’s really helpful to have a weekly safe space for that, and it frees up headspace for other things.