Is anyone else just so fucking proud of their Christmas?

[Minjou]

I have four children. They are adored by their parents. But both those parents grew up in, frankly, different but shit homes. These children have a dad who was beaten and belittled and who grew up with no self esteem at all. And they have a mother who was neglected and abandoned and grew up in and out of care, with the sort of issues you'd expect.

But these children....they have been prioritised and loved and cared for every day of their lives. They have parents who are far from perfect but who have never stopped trying. They have had another happy Christmas day with gifts and great food and games and fun, which is every Christmas they've ever had. They have only the vaguest idea of their parents background.

I never normally talk like this, but I'm drinking the gin my oldest child bought me for Christmas, because he's lovely and he knows me 🤣. AIBU to be just so fucking proud that we broke the cycles we both grew up with, and created this happy new family for ourselves? Because I am. It's the joy of life. It makes everything worthwhile

I'd be ashamed and mortified if I were you for having written that. And if you thought you were being funny - think again.

OP that's just such a lovely post. Thank you and well done to you and your husband and family.

There’s always at least one sanctimonious idiot out there.

Winning at life OP..I love that for you. Lovely post 😊

Lovely to read OP 🥰

🤣😂😂

More than one, apparently. Who would actually vote YABU? Miserable sods.

Why? She's not an alcoholic, she's enjoying a Christmas drink as many people do, presumably a brand she likes and as a treat for her? I seriously doubt a toddler went into an off-licence and bought gin, so either the "child" is grown up, or they asked a responsible adult to get it on their behalf. I received a bottle of champagne and a bottle of prosecco from a daughter and a daughter-in-law, neither yet opened, both of which will be enjoyed at some point. Lighten up.

What a lovely post, and well done you and your partner - what a legacy ❤️

What an absolutely insane thing to say

My dad broke his background and I knew more as I got older - and I am forever thankful and proud and amazed at what he did

guess your kids will be the same - proud thankful and amazed because it’s so hard to to - to recognise whats wrong and then to break the pattern

Ffs.....is that all you can take from this wonderful post? You sad individual.

This is beautiful OP. What a wonderful post. You should be bursting with pride. I’m so happy for you and for them ❤️

Oh do fuck off. You are such a twat.

That is such an inspirational post. So glad you have had a wonderful Christmas and you've broken the cycle. It takes real strength of character to do that and you both should be justifiably proud.

You absolutely deserve that gin. I cant wait until my DS is old enough to buy me a bottle 🤣😂🤣

Don’t be so fucking ridiculous 🙄

I’m so fucking proud of you. You have done it! You’ve described my childhood being the same as yours with in and out of care, vilolence and some other vile stuff but me and DH have woken up this monring and said to each other the same thing as you. Feeling emotional and thrilled that we have broken the curse too. Are children are still small so no gin for me but I’m sure in 10 years or so that will be on the agenda too. This monring the children are all up playing and eating the gingerbread house we made before Xmas for breakfast because why not. Not one argument, no tears and only smiles and happiness yesterday which is continuing to day.

well done to you. You knew what you wanted to for yourself so you’ve given that to your children and now you can rest easy knowing you have trumped all the odds

You don't need to justify yourself OP, that poster is simply envious and a bit dim!!

My Daughter bought me some Rum and I was over the fucking moon!!!

Your post was lovely to read. Good on you and your husband for breaking the cycle xxxxx

Good for you. I'm incredibly proud of my children too. All adults now but have lovely manners and they are really thoughtful and caring.

I'm also really proud of the knockout meal me and my youngest son made yesterday. Was definitely the best Christmas dinner I have ever made. My son was the chopper and peeler and generally helped with the whole thing and didn't complain once.

I haven't had to do any cleaning up.

I have had some awful Christmases in the past and I am always a bit nervous but it went great.

You should be very very proud

Enjoy the gin and Merry Christmas OP

Another chain breaker here, your post has just reminded me that I really should be proud of myself more often!
I was shuddering just now reading the post about parents having a huge row at Christmas, I remember one vividly at my house with my brother squaring up to my dad on the verge of a physical fight. Horrible, has never left me.

Well done. My own childhood wasn't great, although nothing like as bad as yours sound and when I finally realised age around 45 with 2 teenage DDs that I'd had an odd and very controlling upbringing, I set about changing the way I did things with great results. Now they are in their 30's I am just so proud of us all and so very grateful for that lightbulb moment I had. It's all drama free and full of kindness and mutual respect. Truly a calm and happy home. All the more important since my DH got ill in February and died in May so we have really needed to support each other this year and we all agree we've done great in coming to terms with that shock and loss because we can communicate well with each other and "staying close" as we did in the early days after he died has helped us all so much in coming to terms with our new life.

well done again. My "new" philosophy started with thinking what would my mother have done in this situation and then doing the opposite.

OP, I am DELIGHTED for you.

@Rosealea I’ve reported your post as a personal attack.

I read that one too. It was also horrible how some posters were trying to excuse the woman's role in the toxicity and blame it all on the man. Both were just as bad as each other in horrible insideous ways.

My mum used to threaten to harm herself when people argued with her. It's so emotionally abusive. I look at my children and think how could you do that to them??

Since becoming a mum I've realised a lot of things that were normalised at the time really weren't. We've worked hard to give our kids the love and support, and most importantly the stability we didn't have.

So the OPs post is a powerful message of hope and selflessness over generational trauma.

Do you have such poor reading comprehension that you missed the rest of the post?
Are you perpetually offended, spending your entire life poised to clutch your pearls at the slightest provocation?
Or did you read a post written by a woman who grew up in horrible circumstances, in which she expresses happiness and gratitude at having given her own children a completely different experience…and think to yourself “do you know what this woman needs? Judgment. That’ll show her!”
I genuinely hope you’re just thick. But if you’re not - do you feel proud of yourself for posting this?

ANYWAY.

OP, you should be proud. I don’t even know you and I feel proud of you both! It sounds like you’ve both totally broken the cycle; that’s a hard thing to do but your children are clearly supported, cared for, and know how loved they are. I had a horrible upbringing, and you’ve reminded me that I should be proud of how different my own children’s family life is too. This is such a heartwarming thread ❤️

I thought you were going to say you were really proud because your turkey wasn't dry and all the trimmings were ready at the same time (that's what I'm proud of this Christmas). But yours is much more impressive - well done!