Neighbours complaining about noisy dc in garden

[Xmasinthegarden]

We got the dc (8 and 5) a lot of presents for the garden (mud kitchen , outdoor toys, football/goals basketball hoop etc) they both have AuDHD and need to let off steam in the fresh air.

They were in the garden 10-1. Then back out again after lunch 230-430.

We had had a text from the neighbours at 115pm saying ‘we have guests today and would appreciate a little less noise from the garden thanks’ which I ignored but when the dc went back out at 230pm we had them knocking and telling us that they have family there and some are quite elderly and want peace and quiet and their niece has a newborn and all the commotion from our garden is very irritating as they are trying to relax in their conservatory. I said that the dc were not being that noisy and they wouldn’t be out there past 430 anyway. They said if this happens again tomorrow they will file a ‘noise complaint’ and may call the police!

The dc were just playing, not screaming or fighting. Just running about. Some ball bouncing yes but nothing terrible. They play out pretty much every day and this hasn’t been an issue before ? The neighbours moved in Feb this year so obviously it’s their first Xmas here but they would have known our dc play out a lot ?

They have text now with a ‘gentle reminder - tomorrow needs to be a calm peaceful day. Thanks for your cooperation’ wtf !!!

AIBU to ignore this ? We are home in the morning them leaving at 1230 to see my parents so if the dc play in the garden it wont be for that long just 2/3 hours in the morning.

Exactly! Term time they are at school. 2 days a week have an after school
club. The other days they usually play out when they get home till dinner time. Weekends they are out there a lot and spring and summer holidays they are out there for a very long time. It’s hard to explain but sometimes going out causes them mental exhaustion and stress so we’ve found that being active in a safe familiar environment makes them physically exhausted, they eat better and sleep better.

Or a kiddies' badminton set. They are massive fun. The issue here is these neighbours have been very tolerant, and it is not that they are being horrible. They are at their wits' end because, having been so tolerant all year, they just wanted some peace at Christmas. Otherwise, you are all the time just putting your needs first to the health detriment of others.

They just need a break, that is all.

Do you know what @Xmasinthegarden if the shitty responders on this thread could only walk a mile in your family's shoes.

Obviously there are trolls on this thread.

It’s impossible for anyone to make fair judgment if they haven’t heard the noise. What is acceptable and normal playing noise to one person is over the top intrusive noise to another. Of course children should be able to play in their own garden, but 5 hours is fairly relentless if it’s very loud.

Makes you wonder why the previouse neighbours moved out

Exactly.

I used to play badminton tons as a kid as it was quiet

I thought your own back garden was a private space and normal kid noises are well…. Normal. I would ignore your neighbours and let them make a complaint to be told that they don’t have a leg to stand on

Or maybe some of us are autistic ourselves and understand that we can't just do whatever we like and sod everyone else.

If OP's children need to regulate then she needs to find quiet ways for them to do that - soft, foam balls instead of hard ones etc.

Bet she laughing every week

Yeah I have an autistic teen, I wouldn't have let them be banging all Christmas day and impacting the neighbours. Don't assume we're all trolls, we just have some consideration for other people too. They should be able to enjoy being in their house as much as the OP's children should be able to enjoy their garden.

No one is saying they have to stay in all day, there just needs to be a little bit of thought and compromise.

So another entitled person here.

You are selfish and have come on here to validation - which you clearly are not getting. Yes, you have dc but you are clearly spoiling a special day for other people due to your entitled attitude. I have 2 quite noisy dc myself but I would absolutely hate living next to you. As a parent it is your job to meet their needs, however, it shouldn’t be at anyone else’s expense which it currently is. 8-6 squealing in the garden all summer and you seriously think there is nothing wrong with that?? The poor people ask for a couple of
hours peace due to having elderly relatives over and not only do you send your dc back out but you come on mumsnet to moan about them. You are the problem and the pp you responded to had it spot on.

Reply with "Dear neighbour, please feel free to call the police about my children playing in there garden between Y and X time. Given it's Christmas day and my children are playing outside with there new toys and you are harassing me because my children are playing in their garden in the day time i would welcome a chat with the police about your behaviour towards my family.

Doing your best for your children does not have to stop you being considerate to others.
You chose to. There is a difference.

They’re being frankly fucking ridiculous and very selfish. Let them try with the noise complaint or police report. Children playing at a normal volume in their own garden at intervals between 10am-430pm?

Ignore them and do as you want. On a side note, if they think they’re getting any peace at all with both children indoors all day tomorrow when they want to be outside, they’re in for a shock

Precisely!

Nobody is saying OP's children should spend all day inside on screens, but they also don't need to be playing noisily outside all day either. There's compromise to be had.

I think it's quite telling that OP's neighbours haven't complained at all until today when OP bought her kids noisy bouncing balls.

Blimey. I’m glad I don’t live next door to you.

Wrong again I don’t have kids!

Give it a go. Let's see.

As I said previously tomorrow we will be leaving at 1230 to see family so next door will at least have the afternoon they want with the dc not in the garden. So it should be fine ?

Why not do the decent thing and give them the day

Your neighbours are ridiculous, OP. Let them call the police (who obviously won't be interested.). In my experience new born babies don't need silence to fall asleep.

Its Xmas and they will want to play with their toys, it also gets them valuable fresh air and keeps them functioning well with eating and sleeping due to getting enough fresh air and exercise. Next door will get majority of the day as the dc will prob only be out 2-3 hours max.

How entitled, pathetic and patronising tone neighbours are being! I would be telling the kids to stay out longer, cheeky fuckers!

Explain that your DC need time outdoors to help manage their conditions, apologise if it's disturbing, and tell them you'll be out all afternoon tomorrow so there should be a lot more peace and quiet.

It won't cost you anything, they'll feel listened to, and it'll help keep the nice tolerant relationship you've had up till now (they really are tolerant if they've survived the summer holidays 8-6 every day without a word of complaint).