Does anyone else turn into a pathetic mess when poorly?

[JulietSierra]

I’ve read on here about the dressing gown of doom that many men put on when poorly, but in my house I’m the pathetic one when unwell.

Ive succumbed to the lurgy that’s been flying round my school. I’m not ill, just full of cold with a headache and intermittent temperature. But I’m feeling so sorry for myself and have moaned for the last 4 days. My health anxiety is raging that it’ll turn into pneumonia and I’ve just splashed 30 quid on a jar of manuka honey in the vain hope that it will help.

Dh on the other hand would hardly even notice if he had these symptoms. He’d carry on completely as normal. Last time he had a cold, the only acknowledgment he gave it was to sing that he was in ‘Bogey Wonderland’ (to the tune of Boogie Wonderland) and gave the gym a miss for a couple of days.

I really wish I could give myself a good shake and change my attitude. I’m such a wet blanket. Anyone else as pathetic as me??

Not at all.
I am completely intolerant and impatient with any kind of illness for myself, because it has the potential to interrupt my day.

I get dosed up and crack on.

Im a bit like that with my kids too, my spidey senses tell me if there’s something really wrong ( I’ve been a nurse for over 30 years) but can’t get excited over things like minor illness, temperatures (I don’t own a thermometer) coughs, colds etc.

I don’t take any time off work for illness either (unless D&V which the last time I had that was possibly 15 years ago).

No, and it drives me mad when other people do it - sorry!

I know, I’m such a drip!
To be fair, I never take time off work sick (last time was when I really did have pneumonia!) and I do crack on with my day but I just feel so bloody sorry for myself and over analyse else single symptom. Wish I could just shake myself out of it.

I try to dose myself up and get out into the fresh air as very often being in the house actually makes me feel worse.

Complaining about being unwell usually means that I am feeling better. If I am truly unwell, I am very quiet and in bed.

Do you put on a poorly voice?
DH does and I can't bear it.

He's threatened that he's got a cold today, he's already zipped his fleece to the top & stalked round sighing.

I don’t have a poorly voice but I have caught myself muttering ‘I’m sick of this’ several times today.

I get pathetic too. I hate that I do. So I try really hard to avoid illness! I used to be able to power through, dose up, etc but in the last couple of years I just don't respond well at all. Get well soon!

Feel better soon🌷 You are not pathetic it's not unusual to feel low when unwell, its okay to moan too! Laugh at yourself a bit 😊Most of all be kind to yourself x

I really can't cope with being unwell, I need to take to my bed and sleep it off.

Dp on the other hand sees it as some kind of weakness and will just 'crack on' with life whatever the ailment.

I try so hard to avoid it too which is really hard as I teach in Reception! And when I do get poorly I get really annoyed and think it’s so unfair that I should be feeling so bad.

Usually no but this particular illness had my crying over my laptop earlier (I am day 9 and still feeling awful, in fact I've given up actually believing I'll get better and now I'm in full on pathetic and sad mode)

I did log on to work and was only meant to do a half day, couldn't even manage that.

Praying for a miracle recovery tomorrow as I'm so over it all now.

Sorry you’re feeling so rotten, hope you turn a corner very soon.
When I’m unwell I really do worry that I’ll never feel well again. I get so sad. I think it’s my anxiety that’s the real issue to be honest. Sick of myself.

I feel you.
I've had this bloody cold since last Tuesday. I thought I was turning a corner on Saturday, but it's stayed stubbornly as bad for the past 3 days, with no improvement. Super-snotty and completely bunged up, I've been using the nasal decongestant spray, which works for a few hours, but does nothing to subdue the snot-river, despite its claims!
I haven't been able to enjoy any of the Christmas choccies or crisps yet, as my taste and smell is messed up. Very sad.
The first of the visitors arrive tomorrow morning, so I'm planning a hot bath and early night, and hoping for the best.

Apart from throwing some bleach down the toilets earlier, I've got none of the cleaning/tidying jobs done that I wanted to do today. Boooo.

Not usually, with colds etc. I just crack on, but I just can’t cope at all with having a headache

are you a man?😂

Nope. Im stoic. I hate being ill and any kind of sympathy and attention. I grit my teeth and get on with it. DH always says I’m like the sheep in the field that keels over and dies rather than complaining.

You can get inoculated against pneumonia. It cost about £70 some years back. You can get it free on NHS once you reach a certain age and apparently that has some other things in it so worth getting the two

No I'm pretty stoic, usually pop some heavy duty cold and flu medicine and get on with it - I have 5 kids and DH worked away most of the time they were growing up so I didn't have much choice really! Now they're grown up, I do take it easy if I feel under the weather but I can't remember the last time I was actually in bed ill!

No!!!!! Definitely not! 😂

I fully intended on getting that this year. Despite rarely getting poorly I’ve actually had pneumonia twice and really don’t want it again!

I'm currently skulking in the front room, with a large box of tissues. I'm snotty and achy, but fortunately I have no visitors for Christmas and my children are all young adults. So I'm going to wallow.

DP is, he sees all illness as an unfair punishment for a man who tries his best. It's not fair that he's been inflicted in this way when he hasn't offended anyone. It's an outlook which I find entirely bonkers. I try to be patient, because he genuinely feels unable to endure with any dignity at all.

I'm a crack on kind of person, but I don't necessarily think that's always better. I'm teaching the kids to take the time if they need it.

Also a teacher, and having felt so pleased to finish the term on my feet having spent the last fortnight dosing really quite poorly kids in school, I've woken up today feeling like shit. In term time I just crack on as time off isn't an option, but when on holiday I give myself permission to rest and have some healthy boundaries around my wellbeing and recovery feel a bit sorry for myself. I don't think it's pathetic at all.
Get well soon, OP.

Gosh you have been really unlucky, hope you feel better soon

Nope, I'm in the Pathetic camp too! I'm not sure if it's unreasonable or not - either you melt into a puddle and get a bit emotional when you're ill, or you don't. My own DH masks his unwellnesses (which annoys me as it makes me feel guilty about vocalising how crappy I feel!) and soldiers on. I seem to lurch from one cold to another between October and March, to the extent that I do wonder if something's amiss with my immune system. Should probably get a lot more fresh air, exercise and green veg!

Hope you feel better in time for Christmas, OP. After all the prep, shopping, cleaning/tidying that I'm sure you and pretty much everyone has done, it seems like such a pig to be laid low at the 11th hour. I currently feel like hurling and can't face eating anything that isn't a dry cracker.