AIBU? 4 day Fever and I’m panicking

[CaffeineChaosandCuddles]

My daughter is on day 4 of a fever. It’s been anywhere from 37.6-39.5. Calpol / nurofen ALWAYS brings it down ( not to normal, but it reduces )

she’s negative for Flu A, B & Covid

Today she’s only needed one lot of Calpol which brought a temp of 38.0 to around the 37.5 mark, which I’m happy with, but yesterday afternoon it snot up again to 39.5 so I feel incredibly anxious and on edge.

shes seen a GP, said her chest was clear and said tonsillitis immediately after looking in her throat, and gave her antibiotics - but stated it could be viral, but antibiotics are to be taken incase it’s bacterial.

her symptoms are/have been:

• coughing
• snotty ( more today )
• headaches ( gone today )
• lack of appetite ( which seems to be back today, ate a fruit salad for breakfast, pizza at lunch and is now asking for a hot chocolate )

I suffer with terrible health anxiety since my son was born extremely premature and was on life support 18 months ago.

my eldest is very rarely sick, so to see her ill- my mind races to like a child hood cancer, like leuk because of the temps going up for 4 days now.

I spoke to the doctor last night and he didn’t really seem concerned. Can 4 days of temp simply be normal for a virus?! ( or bacterial, but me and husband are swaying towards virus because she’s been on the antibiotics for 72 hours now and other symptoms improving, the temp isn’t )

AIBU to catastrophise? thank you. X

@CaffeineChaosandCuddles Do yourself and your family a favour and throw that bloody thermometer out of the window. You are doing you and your children no favours. Do you want your daughter to end up like you, do you?

But you won't do any of that will you?

You will ignore all the people who are talking sense, only listen to those who feed your anxiety.

I feel sorry for your family.

The raised temperature is a sign her immune system is doing it's job and fighting the virus. Its a good thing. as PP have said, so long as she's drinking and even better eating, don't stress about the numbers

She's eating, she's drinking, she's alert

She's ok OP.

I don’t think you’re even reading replies.

You do not have to give calpol for a temperature. Your child is getting better.

I am reading the replies, everyone is critising me for being concerned that my daughter has had a pro-longed fever. It’s thankfully lower today but she’s still seeming run down so im
on edge for it to come up again.

think it’s quite a normal response as a parent, with health anxiety.

Hi @CaffeineChaosandCuddles I know a fever in your child can be really worrying but it is the body’s natural response to a virus. Raising the temperature of the body is the most effective way to kill off a virus. By constantly reducing your child’s temperature you are effectively prolonging the infection because it stalls her immune system’s response. If your child is drinking and eating, let the fever run its course, I would only treat if she was in distress with a fever.

I really hope your child feels better soon.

Thank you, we are at 38.1 again with the fever and it just seems like it’s never ending 💔💔

Is your child eating and drinking? Are they lethargic or playing fairly normally? Is the fever causing distress or discomfort? Any shivering?

She’s eating semi-normally, says she’s got an appetite and then won’t eat it fully.. she’s playing fairly normally but has moments when she’s quieter and still ( she’s never still ) and she doesn’t seem bothered by the fever, although I know when it’s going to be higher, as it aligns to when she is quieter and more still.

I cannot believe it’s gone up AGAIN! I genuinely thought we were out of the other end!

Please see a professional for your health anxiety. Your children shouldn’t have to grow up with this.

No it isn't a normal response
But you're not listening

But 5/6 days of a fever when you know the cause, have started treatment and her is starting to feel better in herself isn’t a need to worry.

I use a thermometer when ill or feeling different on myself and DD1 because we both have very poor interoception but it sounds like you’re over relaying on the theremometer. It’s one tool to access health.

Your posts are a bit manic and not at all normal, understandable because of circumstances with your DS but still, not normal.

PP have said, treat the child, not the fever. Fever's are good, it means the body is responding to the virus. If DD is eating, drinking and playing (i.e. not lethargically slumped on the sofa all day) then there really is nothing to worry about.

Ds3 (8) recently had a 10 day fever...with no other symptoms. He didn't have so much as a runny nose, just a burning fever which was above 40 when unmedicated, would drop to 38 with meds then go back to 39 or 40.

After a trip to OOO then a trip to the GP, they sent us to the paeds ward at our local hospital on day 6. I was beside myself and convinced he had some awful cancer. They tested him for 20 different viruses, all were negative (all the main flu's, covid and a few others). Throat swabs all negative. A battery of blood tests which showed no indication of bacterial infection markers and no concerns of anything more serious. They let us out and said if we hit day 11 with a fever we'd have to go back.

On day 10 he woke up with the same fever. By 6pm he said he felt hungry...his fever was gone and that was it. Right as rain.

Paeds have put it down to a virus for which he had no symptoms except fever. So yes it can happen and can be entirely 'normal'.

You're not just concerned, you're panicking and anxious to the point of blocking out proper medical advice from an actual doctor in favour of nursing and feeding your anxiety. Those are completely different things and spectacularly selfish.

Your child doesn't have a fever. She has a slightly raised temperature. They're completely different things.

This isn't prolonged. It's a completely normal period of time for an otherwise well child to have a slightly elevated temperature.

This is NOT a normal response as a parent AT ALL. You don't even see that your reaction is completely abnormal.

What do you want from this thread? What are you looking for? To just fret and worry and have people listen to you wasting your time and attend to you fretting and worrying and wasting? Is it an audience you want? Or do you want people eot tell you you're right to worry? Do you want people to worry alongside you? What do you actually want?

I don't think responding to the OP is helping her - it's just giving her something to argue against and more reason to post and fuel her anxiety.

A parent with health anxiety is not a normal parent. Constantly checking, fussing, catastrophising. That will do more harm to your DD than a bug.

What help have you sought with your anxiety?

This

I think this is quite an outrageous comment, ‘a parent with health anxiety is not a normal parent’ - I absolutely am a normal parent, my children have the world. My anxiety is shown on output via this post, texting family or talking to my husband when my child is asleep. She is very unaware of any thoughts I have. This makes me a normal parent, with health anxiety on top.

my health anxiety has no unknown cause. My son was born extremely prematurely in respiratory distress, we nearly lost him due to his lung collapsing and temperature so high he was treated as septic, but his bloods were very hit and miss. He was on life support, 18 months ago. 12 months ago, when he was 6 months old, he had almost stopped breathing due to Flu A and we had to call 999, along came 4 police officers as they were closest followed by 4 paramedics.

my health anxiety has stemmed from nearly loosing my son multiple times due to breathing & a temperature that was considered ‘septic’ enough to treat with inconclusive results. He was tiny.

I am currently going under therapy and have started a new PTSD & Anxiety tablet. These things aren’t a light switch and don’t switch anxiety off and create a ‘logical’ mind set over night.

in regards to my daughter currently:

I’ve not once said how many times I take my child’s temperature. We’ve been taking it when she’s been due her medication and before bed to ensure she’s comfortable, which is approximately 4 times a day, maybe once or twice more on the days she was physically shaking or showing signs she felt unwell.

I find temperatures triggering in many ways. This is why I’m concerned as to why we are going into day 7 with spikes in her temperature, albeit her highest was 38.3 today which is huge improvements from the 39.5, regardless I’m wondering why her body isn’t fighting this virus / fever off quickly and it’s majorly triggering me.

............regardless I’m wondering why her body isn’t fighting this virus / fever off quickly

It is.

Her slightly raised temperature demonstrates that her body is, indeed, fighting off this virus.

And you've been told this over and over again on this thread.

You're unwilling any unable to comprehend this.

You need not take your daughter's temperature six times a day.

Are you equally anxious about her heart rate and breathing? You're not checking her oxygen saturation as well, are you? Blood pressure? Glucose levels?

If you find taking her temperature triggering then stop doing it. Go on how she is in herself, how she's eating and drinking.

No, actually I’m not - how belittling is this comment? I thought mums support mums, not shoot mums down with PTSD and Anxiety.

I can feel she’s burning up, I don’t need to take it to know.. its the temperature that’s triggering, not ‘taking it’. 👍🏼

My son almost died 2 years ago in March and those who haven't experienced that trauma simply won't understand. I also have PTSD and still sometimes wake up in the night with nightmares, though it has thankfully lessened now.

You know you have health anxiety
You are receiving support

It will take time. Though I can't imagine ever been the same again.

I hope your daughter is feeling better soon xx

So stop taking it.