Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To buy a house on same street as ex’s new partner?

50 replies

madhousemove · 19/12/2025 16:08

Split from my ex earlier this year, sold our house together and we (my child and me) are back with my parents.
I’ve fallen in love with a house, put in an offer and had it accepted.
found out since then that my ex’s new partner (6 months ish) and her children live about 4 doors down.
I need to withdraw, don’t I?

OP posts:
SmallBox · 19/12/2025 16:08

Of course you don't.

Vaxtable · 19/12/2025 16:09

If it’s the house you want then go for it. Who cares if the new partner is just down the road? At least he won’t have an excuse not to see his kids

and who is to say he will stay with her anyway

BlondeFool · 19/12/2025 16:09

Nope.

IndigoIsMyFavouriteColour · 19/12/2025 16:10

I would keep my dream house and not worry about the people a few doors up!

fost · 19/12/2025 16:10

If he's abusive and it could be dangerous if he knew where you lived, then yeah

Otherwise you're being insane. I've lived here for more than 20 years and literally never interact with the people who live 4 doors down, i dont even know who they are.

HappyToSmile · 19/12/2025 16:11

You love the house. Buy the house

Candleabra · 19/12/2025 16:11

Do you get on ok with the ex? Nothing should stop you living your life but I personally don’t think I would buy the house tbh.

youalright · 19/12/2025 16:12

Yes pull out I lived near an exs new partner that was also 4 doors away she was far to nosy (like borderline obsessive) and for some reason would update my ex on all the comings and goings they knew far to much it was weird.

sweeneytoddsrazor · 19/12/2025 16:15

Does he live with her, potentially it could be good for the DC. They could pop down and visit Dad and still come home to sleep. You want an evening out Dad can come and have them and go home when you return. As long as you get on reasonably well it should be fine

Original poster
madhousemove · 19/12/2025 16:17

Wow, I’m surprised - I thought it would look weird and stalkery!

no issues, still get on well, children haven’t been introduced to either partner yet (hers or ours) so not sure if that makes a difference?

OP posts:
TheTaupeScroller · 19/12/2025 16:19

No

You don't have to have anything to do with neighbours down the road
They might split up
She might move in a couple of months

She's not living directly opposite and can see everything in your new house-to be does she? So I wouldn't change my plans.

Ablondiebutagoody · 19/12/2025 16:19

I would pull out. Plenty of other houses.

WildCountry · 19/12/2025 16:19

If you get on well and don’t feel upset by seeing the new
partner out and about then it could work well!

MorningCoffees2 · 19/12/2025 16:21

Imagine how much you would kick yourself if your didn't get the house and then 6 months later they split up or she moved house or you realised actually you wouldn't have cared...

Like a PP said, I don't even know who lives 4 doors down from me, it's not like I hang out in my front garden waving at everyone who passes by.

I think it's insane to base such a huge decision on someone you barely know.

Thailandherewecome · 19/12/2025 16:22

I bought a house on the same road as my ex (father of my kids) and his new partner.

A few years on they’ve split up and he’s moved (was her house) and she and I get on like a house on fire 🤷🏼‍♀️

BeeHive909 · 19/12/2025 16:22

Atleast he’s not got any excuses that he can’t see your children when he’ll live 4 doors down. That’s got to be a bonus somewhere

PurpleThistle7 · 19/12/2025 16:48

Depends on the age of kids and the neighbourhood I would think. My kids have played with everyone in our estate at some point and loads of our neighbours exchange Christmas cards, chat in the street etc. So it would be a lot in this scenario. At my old house I barely saw anyone around so it wouldn’t matter at all.

vanillalattes · 19/12/2025 16:58

Their relationship may not even last - just buy the house.

JohnofWessex · 19/12/2025 17:01

Thailandherewecome · 19/12/2025 16:22

I bought a house on the same road as my ex (father of my kids) and his new partner.

A few years on they’ve split up and he’s moved (was her house) and she and I get on like a house on fire 🤷🏼‍♀️

I am friendly with an ex girlfriend of mine

When they are together she and my wife have a great time comparing notes

DeftWasp · 19/12/2025 17:13

madhousemove · 19/12/2025 16:17

Wow, I’m surprised - I thought it would look weird and stalkery!

no issues, still get on well, children haven’t been introduced to either partner yet (hers or ours) so not sure if that makes a difference?

No, it's fine. My ex wife (who cheated) moved in with her new man just down the road - that's life in a small village - you just have to go with the flow, and really seeing them, saying hi, nice weather etc. kind of makes peace with the situation.

WhereYouLeftIt · 19/12/2025 18:51

Four doors down? I couldn't even put a face to my neighbours four doors down, and I've lived here 20+ years.

It's fine. Buy the house!

BaileyHorse · 20/12/2025 11:38

Vaxtable · 19/12/2025 16:09

If it’s the house you want then go for it. Who cares if the new partner is just down the road? At least he won’t have an excuse not to see his kids

and who is to say he will stay with her anyway

This 👆🏻

Pherian · 20/12/2025 11:51

madhousemove · 19/12/2025 16:08

Split from my ex earlier this year, sold our house together and we (my child and me) are back with my parents.
I’ve fallen in love with a house, put in an offer and had it accepted.
found out since then that my ex’s new partner (6 months ish) and her children live about 4 doors down.
I need to withdraw, don’t I?

Nope. It’s not like you knew beforehand and even if you did it doesn’t matter. It’s a house you like. It may also be convenient for visitation between your children and their father in the future.

Sneesellsseashells · 20/12/2025 11:53

Only depends on the emotional impact on you and your kids. Otherwise go ahead.

Lurkingonmn · 20/12/2025 12:15

I think go ahead with the house. We live on a small new housing estate, 20 houses, we exchange Christmas cards with 7 of them, so chat in the street, FB friends with 5, etc but are only really friendly with one household, like been in each others houses more than once etc. At least 12 of them have lived here for 14 years! Depends on the type of neighbours you /they are. Depends on your relationship with the ex.