Sanctimonious card non-senders

[SoldTheMovieRights]

If you don't want to send Christmas cards, because you can't be arsed/ think it's bad for the environment/ just don't fancy it/ find it meaningless, absolutely fine.

But please don't go on social media declaring that the reason you're not doing it is so you can give to charity, and act all holier than thou about it.

Especially if you're constantly showing off your spending on nights out, clothes etc, so maybe some of that could be used for charity donations, and you're definitely affluent enough to afford a few stamps as well as a couple of quid to Save the Children.

Really? Someone sent you a text after they didn’t receive a Christmas card? You sure?

Agreed! In a similar vein I was Facebook friends with a girl who, every year in around September, would post a big status about ‘please don’t buy us any Christmas presents this year, donate any money you would have spent on us to charity instead and please consider asking everyone who buys you gifts to do the same thing. The homeless/ sick/ poor need the money so much more than you do’ 🤮

SOME OF US LIKE GIFTS/ GIFTING! Some of us buy gifts AND give to charity! Stop being so sanctimonious, Julia.

Hyacinth Bucket used to send herself Christmas cards and said it was a service to those people who may have misplaced her address.

I love sending and receiving cards. But then I still write letters too. With a fountain pen (that you'll have to prise from my cold dead fingers) and bottled ink. swishes crinoline

I announced it once only, on FB one year I wasn't doing them anymore, why and I was giving to charity which I did and do.

When I said none I meant generically. I had 5 at the time I couldn't phase out of older family. It's now down to two.

I don't do cards. I don't want them or send them. My adult youngsters are the same. My daughter has been like it for as long as I can remember. This includes birthday cards etc

When I asked her when her eldest now 3 was born if she wanted a card so she could keep them as it was his being born day, she looked at me crazy, saying God no.

i havent come across facebook posts
but i find it annoying when you give them to people at work who declare rudely that they dont send cards
people used to send emails saying they were donating to charity instead.
i dont mind about not receiving your card but dont be rude about it

Thats your prerogative. Lots of people i know still do it and so do I; its personal choice.

My nice colleague came over to thank me for her card the other day, said I don't send them but really appreciate yours and here's a hug instead 😊 I really liked that lol

Just too tight to pay postage, then?

Do you generally post cards to neighbours with a stamp, it would be further to walk to the postbox

But if those people didn’t post their sanctimonious comments on facebook, you wouldn’t be able to post your sanctimonious thread on mumsnet, which you’re obviously loving, just like they love their Facebook posts. You’re more similar than you realise.

Mumsnet at its broadminded best. So lovely to see.

I haven’t sent any cards, haven’t made any apologies and haven’t donated to charity. Luckily I live in France where mass Christmas card sending is not a thing. The few cards I’ve received are from older British friends living here / DHs family.

I sent thirty cards this year. I work full time. I don't have time 30x chats and that's not the level of contact I or they need, but its cousins / aunts etc who I'd like not to be totally alienated from. It's a nice traditional and as long as I can afford the stamps, I'll do it.

but i find it annoying when you give them to people at work who declare rudely that they dont send cards

@EleanorReally this is interesting. Do you mean they declare it in a rude way (like, swearing or shouting) - which is not OK? Or simply that to say that is rude?

If anyone gives me a card at work, I just say, oh thank you, I don't send Christmas cards – just so they know not to expect one from me. I don't think I am being rude?

BTW even in my days of sending by post many many cards (I used to) I never gave them to people at work. I will see them fgs. Some I will see on Christmas Eve or even, in one role, on Christmas Day.

Sorry, I missed a bit, she said she wasnt giving cards and was donating to charity instead

I got 10 cards from our local hospice shop.
They cost me £4.95.
Stamp costs are ridiculous. I posted 2 and stuck another tenner in the collection box

🤣👍

I don't think it's code for can't be arsed. It's a straight forward message to say they will spend on charity instead of hallmarks PR.

I send cards to the people in my life I know particularly value them. I put a message on social media. And I make an extra donation to charity. It’s a revalation to me that people might talk shit about me for this. Fortunately, I don’t think anyone I care about/is a nice person would. So there’s that.
In other news, I like to give and recieve home made presents (hate the word gift), almost always love unexpected visitors and quite like my MIL in a mild sort of way. Maybe it’s time I handed in my Mumsnet badge.

Wow, this is eye opening to say the least! I do not send cards, I do a Xmas charity donation (between £200-£300 to Crisis if anyone cares) and I have previously posted in on social media to let all the distant relatives know - not my relatives obviously, my DHs thousands of relatives who expect his wife to do all of the sort of pointless admin like sending Xmas cards…
@SoldTheMovieRights what’s your thoughts on the family round robin letter that comes with the cards?

I meant she is only giving cards to those she DOESN'T have to pay postage for!

Same here @Condensationon , I do it for my twin boys who died in the NICU 2 years ago. I have so little memories of them so their existance is precious to plus people tend to forget about them. I promote a baby loss organisation that supported us and I donate to them. I'm sorry about your mum🥰 I know exactly what you mean about each year you feel further away. I hope you have a peaceful christmas this year xxx

For me it depends on the tone and what is said - I gave one to a lady at work who immediately loudly declared "Oh I don't do cards!" which I thought was kinda rude.

There are other people at work I've given cards to who've said 'thank you! I don't do cards though so don't expect one back from me!' which I didn't find rude. Some people also joke about being too disorganised for cards, again don't find that rude. Your response doesn't sound rude to me!

To be fair though I'm also not keeping score of who's giving out cards, if I give one to someone and I don't receive one back I'm very unlikely to notice let alone care 😂

Oh the irony. Their money is better given to charity but your money is better spent on cards for them?