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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is this really enough food? Fed up of DH’s tightness

262 replies

ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 19:55

To give some background, I live with DH and our DD. We have two sons who are at Uni and will be returning to ours ahead of the weekend for Christmas.

For the first night they are back, we thought it would be good to have party food so DH went out to get this earlier. We are both busy the next two days so this was the only opportunity - we also live very rurally so can’t just pop down the round for a shop.

He has come back with the following:

-2 lots of ‘3 for 2’ party food so 6 in total - things like breaded prawns and spring rolls. Not massive portions at all
-Two share bags of crisps
-Olives and a small pack of antipasto (salami etc)

Now, both DS’ are 6 foot plus rugby playing young men. They eat us out of house and home at the best of times. DD is really slender but has a healthy appetite too.

I don’t know what DH was thinking - I’d clearly said to buy double that amount of party food. Having discussed with him, it comes down to money which is ridiculous. He earns six figures which is complimented by my own salary and we have ample disposable income.

He maintains its sufficient food for the 5 of us. AIBU to disagree?

OP posts:
Happyjoe · 17/12/2025 20:43

Can you get pizza delivered? Perfect treat for uni students and the other bits on the side.

Sorry, Edit - just read you are out in the sticks, so prob no delivery option. Looks like one of you has to go shopping again..

DaisyChain505 · 17/12/2025 20:44

I’d be adding a few pizzas, a bag of wedges and some garlics breads into the mix.

TowerRavenSeven · 17/12/2025 20:44

No way enough food. Our ds is coming home with his gf (so four adults total) and we just bought a 16 lb. Turkey for one meal + sandwiches. Not to mention I made a 3 lb fruitcake, mince pies, gingerbread men and cinnamon biscuits, plus all the snacks, party mix, booze, etc.

InfoSecInTheCity · 17/12/2025 20:51

soupyspoon · 17/12/2025 20:26

Jesus what a load of faff, the whole point of party food is its processed and oven ready and easy to eat and slap on the table. Presumably if OP wanted to make a load of stuff she wouldnt have sent him out for prepped party food.

Show quote history

True, it is a faff and goes against the concept of bunging stuff in the oven but the situation is what it is now and from what the OP has said:

  • they have a limited amount of bung it 8n the oven party food available
  • no access to the shops due to time and location
  • usual food is non- upf and cook from scratch so presumably store cupboard basics and whole foods in the freezer.

So the choice appears to be:

  • Be hungry after a small meal
  • make some stuff to bulk it out.
Justchilling07 · 17/12/2025 20:51

DappledThings · 17/12/2025 20:03

Doesn't seem that bad. 1.5 sharing things each plus cold meats and crisps. It's not overflowing but it's not noticeably mean either I don't think.

Doesn’t seem that good either😂
I completely agree with op, personally, l think it’s come across as mean spirited, no effort has been made, that’ll do, sort of outlook.Bah humbug😬

soupyspoon · 17/12/2025 20:51

dontmalbeconme · 17/12/2025 20:41

I agree the selection isn't very varied, and I'd prefer some salad, veg, cheesebord etc. But that wasn't the question. OP asked if it was sufficient quantity, and I think it probably is, depending on the items bought.

Show quote history

Ok fair enough I get that. I thought perhaps it might not be enough, firstly those items are very small but also the xample was probably not based on the usual 3 for 2 ones, you couldnt get 50 cocktail sausages in one of those deals I think.

The 3 for 2 deals are normally trays of 10 things each.

soupyspoon · 17/12/2025 20:53

InfoSecInTheCity · 17/12/2025 20:51

True, it is a faff and goes against the concept of bunging stuff in the oven but the situation is what it is now and from what the OP has said:

  • they have a limited amount of bung it 8n the oven party food available
  • no access to the shops due to time and location
  • usual food is non- upf and cook from scratch so presumably store cupboard basics and whole foods in the freezer.

So the choice appears to be:

  • Be hungry after a small meal
  • make some stuff to bulk it out.
Show quote history

True. The husband is in for faff alright.

Notashamed13 · 17/12/2025 20:54

Not rtft. Got any oven chips????? Yanbu

LovesLabradors · 17/12/2025 20:54

This has to be a joke - doesn't sound nearly enough for 5.
My early-20s sons would eat that as a side with a Dominos pizza, and then want pudding.
I can't believe how much young men eat & stay slim!

Whereismyfleeceblanket · 17/12/2025 20:56

Does he resent the ds's coming home?

Delphiniumandlupins · 17/12/2025 20:57

If he's worried about the cost why didn't he go to Aldi rather than M & S? Get a plate and portion out 1/5 of what he's bought, so he can see how much he is going to get for dinner. Then explain to him that he will be last to help himself and if the DC take more he will get less. Can your DD or either DS pick up some more food?

Toothfairy89 · 17/12/2025 20:57

soupyspoon · 17/12/2025 20:05

Is this to feed people the whole evening, so picky bits all night, grazing?

It wont be enough if so, but presumably you have bread and pasta or rice in the house with veg perhaps, mix up a big pot of flavoured rice/pasta with veg in it, perhaps nuts and seeds, perhaps mix tuna and olives in it, so its a hearty big bowl and supplements the little bits

Then cheeses, we have a virtal cheese board in the fridge at all times to be honest, we have tons of tins of beans and lentils so could make up a big veggie chilli or just bean stew type thing and that can be put on teh side.

But I suppose the whole point was not cooking so scrap that

No bread in the freezer?

He'll just have to go back out if you havent got anything.

No one wants a bowl of rice, veg and nuts when they're supposed to be having party food

Op he needs more party food, or at least pizza or some French bread/garlic bread type thing. His own stupid fault that he didn't buy enough and needs to go back out

PyongyangKipperbang · 17/12/2025 20:57

I would order a couple of large delivery pizzas to go with that, preferably something expensive just to make the point.

I mean, I dont like things that are not good value in general but once in a blue moon is hardly going to break the bank.

I take it that this is an ongoing issue going by the title of the OP?

ThePerfectTimeToPanic · 17/12/2025 20:59

lol, very funny but I see you OP 👀

6 foot rugby playing lads
Slender daughter
6 figure salary
live rurally
Mention of UPFs and cooking from scratch

😂

Original poster
ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 21:00

Delphiniumandlupins · 17/12/2025 20:57

If he's worried about the cost why didn't he go to Aldi rather than M & S? Get a plate and portion out 1/5 of what he's bought, so he can see how much he is going to get for dinner. Then explain to him that he will be last to help himself and if the DC take more he will get less. Can your DD or either DS pick up some more food?

He won’t go near an Aldi or Lidl with a barge pole (his words not mine), which I always point out to him is ironic as he’d no doubt prefer the prices! I usually do our shop at M&S, it is rare I ask him to do it.

OP posts:
ChocolateCinderToffee · 17/12/2025 21:00

It sounds like the sort of snacks you'd have before dinner!

Original poster
ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 21:01

PyongyangKipperbang · 17/12/2025 20:57

I would order a couple of large delivery pizzas to go with that, preferably something expensive just to make the point.

I mean, I dont like things that are not good value in general but once in a blue moon is hardly going to break the bank.

I take it that this is an ongoing issue going by the title of the OP?

Kindly, I think a few posters have lost sight of the fact we are rural - not a takeaway in sight.

OP posts:
dontmalbeconme · 17/12/2025 21:01

soupyspoon · 17/12/2025 20:51

Ok fair enough I get that. I thought perhaps it might not be enough, firstly those items are very small but also the xample was probably not based on the usual 3 for 2 ones, you couldnt get 50 cocktail sausages in one of those deals I think.

The 3 for 2 deals are normally trays of 10 things each.

Show quote history

I took all the numbers from the first 6 items listed under 3 for 2 party food on the Sainsbury's app. I did see later that it's M&S. That's why I asked OP what he'd bought and quantities. 6x 10 items wouldn't be much for 5, but if it's including selections of 50, 20, 18 as well, then it's likely to be loads. 2 x150g share bags of crisps would be 50g per person (2 standard bags each), plus olives, salami etc.

I don't think this is as stingy as some people are imagining.

BernardButlersBra · 17/12/2025 21:01

🤣🤣🤣 me, my husband and 2 toddlers could get through all that no problems. So definitely not enough for you guys

DontPokeMe · 17/12/2025 21:01

GrassMarketeer · 17/12/2025 20:19

I actually think this is ok for the pre-made party food element. It's often quite greasy and rich and usually presented as small tasters, not a hearty meal.

Maybe your DH is thinking of adding olive bread, sourdough or rye bread, cheeses, nice crackers, hummus, wnipped feta, some lovely small tomatoes etc.

Saving the budget for that!😀

I agree about the greasy/rich element. I'd need some fresh bits and nice bread, part baked rolls or crackers and salad bits along side - tomatoes, celery and radishes with dips. Maybe some sliced ham or a ready cooked chicken for protein.

BunnyLake · 17/12/2025 21:01

Can you make a pasta salad? If you’ve got any potatoes maybe a potato salad or garlic butter potatoes. Anything carby really to bulk it up.

Original poster
ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 21:01

dontmalbeconme · 17/12/2025 21:01

I took all the numbers from the first 6 items listed under 3 for 2 party food on the Sainsbury's app. I did see later that it's M&S. That's why I asked OP what he'd bought and quantities. 6x 10 items wouldn't be much for 5, but if it's including selections of 50, 20, 18 as well, then it's likely to be loads. 2 x150g share bags of crisps would be 50g per person (2 standard bags each), plus olives, salami etc.

I don't think this is as stingy as some people are imagining.

Edited
Show quote history

Only one pack has 10 , nothing larger than that.

OP posts:
CarefullyCuratedFurniture · 17/12/2025 21:02

Oh for goodness sake, of course it's a mean and stingy spread. Tell him to get back in the car and go and buy the same again, at least. If it does turn out that you've over-catered, you can put the excess in the freezer.

MartinAynuss · 17/12/2025 21:03

Hmmm, well my 7ft American football playing sons would just inhale that as a pre-dinner snack.
What about a massive salad to go with it? Or maybe some whole loaves of bread and several pints of whole milk for them to snack on?

mondaytosunday · 17/12/2025 21:03

@DappledThingsdo you have uni aged sons? My son alone would demolish three party platters and be raiding the fridge! Some of those sharing platters only have six things in them.