Christmas alone on 'bed rest'. Any tips?

[123456789xyz]

I don't want to drip feed but also don't want to be too outing so will try to keep details general.

My mother died a few months ago and we decided (me, Dad, siblings) to boycott Christmas and go away for a holiday somewhere far away and warm. I've been looking forward to it for months, especially as my father (who is basically allergic to the cold) and siblings all went away on similarly exotic month-long trips on Boxing Day the last several years in a row and I stayed to care for Mum.

Long story short, my health collapsed a few weeks ago and I'm not fit to fly. I've told them to go without me. They leave tomorrow for a month. Technically I'm meant to be on bed rest but find it hard to stay still and the medical team I'm under (who will do home visits a few times a week) understand that.

I've got loads of books and I plan to go to the library and stock up. I've also got a few jigsaws. I hate colouring books and I'm too impatient and restless at the moment for films or sewing/embroidery etc. I've organised to meet a friend for a walk on Saturday (which I know I shouldn't but I'm going to go crazy if I don't) There's no one else around and it's going to be my only chance this side of New Year to chat with someone who isn't someone from the NHS and who can actually chat about their life rather than mine.

How would you handle this? Any advice or suggestions welcome.

These are all brilliant ideas, thanks so much!

One thing I was definitely going to do is deep clean the fridge. Everything else is pretty clean and sorted already but the fridge is a nice time consuming, relatively sedentary task.

I'm excited about lots of books but I am just worried about the tedium and being sedentary for long periods panics me. I think I'm excited about the jigsaw because I can do a lot of it standing up and stretching and there's lots of good stuff I can listen to on the radio as well.

I am rubbish at art but I try some drawing / writing / maybe even make a collage or something. I just need something - anything - to keep my hands and my brain busy and try to keep myself resting because the urge to spend the entire time doing insane amounts of exercise is really strong, but I have to if I want to avoid another inpatient admission (which would be disastrous for me).

I'm just worried about how i'm going to cope with the boredom but also emotionally and mentally. Early recovery is hard enough as it is.

It doesn't feel like Christmas so I'm not that fussed about that. But I do really really miss mum. And I'm worrying about what my brain is going to do to me spending the next month alone.

Great recommendation, thank you!

I'm so sorry that you're going through such a tough time, and it will be tough without your family around so make sure that you keep in touch with them. I lost my mother just coming up for 3 years ago (then my father a few months after that) and my sister has been my lifeline. She's also gone away somewhere hot for several weeks. Like you, I wanted her to go, but I find hard without her here.

Is there anything that you've always wanted to do, but not had the time? Journalling? A foreign language? Sort out photos, and get copies done for your father and siblings? I think jigsaws are a good idea as they're an actual thing, I think it would be easy to get absorbed in tv and screens. Are you crafty at all?

How about learning to tie different knots?
It could be absorbing and useful too!

If your friend drives then get him/her to take you for a drive. Go equipped with snacks and a flask of tea. Then find a nice place to stop and admire the view or the world going by.

This is a brilliant idea! Thanks!

I'd sign up for a course. There's BBC Maestro or Masterclass. Also the Open University have free short courses or there's Udemy, Skillshare, Coursera or Futurelearn. Lots of free or very cheap courses.

Knitting as suggested! I'm rubbish at drawing but love knitting.

Also crochet, embroidery, quilting. Sometimes people who don't get on with knitting really like crochet or embroidery.

You could get a booknook kit to put together. I really fancy the DIY Greenhouse kit but know I'd never finish something like that.

I always listen to a podcast or radio play when crafting. I love a radio series called cabin pressure, and the BBC Agatha Christie dramatisations.

Depending how strict you’re meant to be with bed rest, could you buy/borrow/rent a wheelchair?

When I was immobilised by knee/leg problems, we bought a wheelchair, and it was a godsend. I was mostly able to move myself, but when I wasn’t, it made it easy for others to help. If your park has decent paths, it could make meeting up there easier and safer for you, and you might also be able to take yourself out for a little fresh air from time to time.

I've been entering lots of competitions, mostly on Instagram, it's taking up an hour or two a day in little bursts and I've won a cardigan and some books so far. If I can't do a little walk I sit at the window and watch the birds for a bit.

If you would be open to video games, I found a game called Stardew Valley very soothing. It's a very low stakes game where you restore an abandoned farm and make friends with the local villagers.

Any life-admin type stuff you could do? - this would feel productive and be useful (insurances / sorting banks / researching better deals etc)

Photo purge, and simultaneously picking out some lovely ones to get printed?

Researching & planning another holiday for when you're well?

Planning a room restyle / redecorate > make a style inspiration board?

Listening to audiobooks / radio-dramas etc as a change from reading & tv?

I know you said no cross stitch / tapestry etc, but how about paper-crafts (quilling / collage / paint by numbers?)

Hope you feel well soon x

I second Stardew Valley. Life in the valley is oddly addictive, as are a lot of what are called cosy games. The release of the Nintendo switch 2 last summer puts second hand switch 1 consoles into a much cheaper bracket and most cosy games will run fine on them. Try also Animal Crossings or world building games like Civilisation 7 and City Skylines.

I enjoy origami for something to keep my hands busy while I watch TV/listen to audio books etc.

I'd probably also be tempted to do some baking but I can see that might not suit you. But if it did, it might be a nice, relatively sedentary option.

If you haven't done the GCHQ Christmas Puzzles, they have been releasing them every year for a decade so you could go back and do all those:

Puzzles - GCHQ.GOV.UK

What about something like a big project like making a patchwork quilt or similar? To give you something to properly get into? (Edit: Sorry, just clocked you don't want to do sewing)

Jigsaws.

Get a really nice planner and related stationery and get all your ducks in a row for 2026.

Start a vlog.

Hi there @123456789xyz So sorry to hear that you are on bedrest. However, I wonder if you could ask your friend to come and visit you and bring some coffee from outside, as if you are on bedrest, going to the local park might be a bit too much for you atm... I know when I have been told to rest, I usually end up over-extending myself!

There have been some lovely suggestions on here... so I would go with audio books, too and BBC sounds which has some brilliant podcasts as well as brilliant legacy programmes... look at Add to Playlist and Soul Music on R4. Don't discount knitting or crochet, making granny or blanket squares need not ask for too much effort and as you get better you can do more complex stuff.

Would it help if we set up a morning or afternoon group on here so you could meet up with virtual friends for coffee, tea and a chat over the break?

My mum loved this game before she passed away! Happy memories

OP I am so sorry about your mum, and I’m really sorry your family at leaving you behind at Christmas. In their shoes, I simply wouldn’t go - I’d want to stay and he my you company. Then again I can’t believe they went and left your ailing mother last year! They don’t sound like a great family 😢

I really like the daily free puzzles on NYTimes website - and there are some good threads on MN where you can share your Pips, Wordl, Hangfive scores etc. Triplit is a good puzzle too.

How about reorganising your photos? That’s something I like to do at the end of the year

If you are meant to be sedentary how about seeing if a friend can take you for a drive somewhere. Either out into some hills or the coast for views or into a city to see the lights?

Or would you have the funds to hire a little cottage /flat and just have a change of scenery somewhere with nice views

I also have to mainly rest this Christmas (despite liking being busy) and I am putting together a long list of festive books to read my way through.

Could you borrow a wheelchair from somewhere and ask a friend to take you around the shops /to a festive attraction? Or even borrow a mobility scooter maybe? A lot of places will hire these. I have an electric wheelchair now and being able to get out for brief periods really helps ease the cabin fever.

Volunteer for a befriending service, which is phone calls only.

Love some of these suggestions!
I am sorry you're having such a difficult time. I recognise the panic of having long stretches of time to fill.
I suggest structuring your day somehow -eg-
Eg morning='useful' activity/work - online course, language learning, photo sorting, family tree, boring admin
Lunchtime ? Meditation, mindfulness
Afternoon- creative/crafty/reading/social, message friends/family, journaling
Evening- screen on, chill out, movie/get into a series

Only other thought is if you have access to outside space to look at, nature watching /bird feeder/bird song identifier even small scale stuff can take you out of yourself

Diamond art is great to keep busy and you don't have to be good at art

Pick a language on Duolingo and see how far you can get!

@123456789xyz I posted up thread mentioning calories. I am so very sorry for being insensitive. I hope you feel well soon x

Daily Mumsnet & LinkedIn puzzles.
Books, films,
Long hot luxurious baths then new PJs & cocoa
GCHQ christmas quiz
Lots of music
Planning - redecorating or next year's holidays or a garden revamp
The sales - online 🙂