To think many women expect emotional perfection from men but don’t offer the same?

78 replies

ReciprocityMatters · 16/12/2025 10:15

I support high standards.
I support emotional maturity.

But AIBU to think some women now expect men to be therapists, mind-readers, emotionally fluent, endlessly available - while offering very little emotional stability themselves?

We say “I deserve more” but rarely ask “what do I give?”

OP posts:

JHound · 14/01/2026 11:34

aurynne · 25/12/2025 04:26

Women's standards can be as high as they wish when they don't need a man in their life. Mine are sky high, because I'm perfectly happy on my own, so if someone wants to join my life they have to make it even better, which is a hard ask.

If a man or woman is desperate for a partner, that's when they may have to lower their standards. But to be honest, in my experience this is mainly a man's problem. That's why some get so angry at women's "standards". Because they can't reach them. But that's a "they" problem.

Yep. I don’t get the criticism for “impossibly high standards”.

People’s standards can be as sky high as they want. It’s not an issue. They are free to choose to remain single and that impacts nobody but themselves.

HelenaWaiting · 14/01/2026 11:36

ReciprocityMatters · 16/12/2025 10:15

I support high standards.
I support emotional maturity.

But AIBU to think some women now expect men to be therapists, mind-readers, emotionally fluent, endlessly available - while offering very little emotional stability themselves?

We say “I deserve more” but rarely ask “what do I give?”

I think you'll find that any women who expected perfection from men, emotional or otherwise, probably died wondering. 😆

BlueandWhitePorcelain · 14/01/2026 14:27

The13thFairy · 24/12/2025 16:58

I can't get my head round what 'emotional perfection' might look like ~ OP gave a skimpy, threadbare idea to go on with, but this surely doesn't/can't define it? I certainly can't provide it, whatever it might be.

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My psychology lecturer told us, when men get married, they slip into seeing their wife as another mother, and they are the man child. I can’t see how women expect emotional perfection in that scenario, when they are telling their DH, they have two/three/however many children, and they don’t need him to be another child? It’s more like emotional immaturity!

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