To think the biggest difference between family Christmas' is whether you dress up or not

[Namechange234567]

This is a light-hearted one after some frankly depressing threads this morning!

But after having a few blended Christmas' now the biggest difference doesn't seem to be when you eat, whether you have turkey or not, if you have alcohol from 6am onwards but whether you dress up. My family is firmly in the pyjamas from Christmas Eve to boxing day camp, we might throw on some different leggings to go for a walk, but hey we're wearing big coats so is it really needed?! But we then go to some houses and suddenly everyone is super fancy, wearing heels inside the house and maybe even changing again for dinner.

I feel like all Christmas invitations should come with a dress code!

YABU = No clearly there's something else to watch out for with a Christmas invite because other families are crazy
YANBU = I've also been incorrectly dressed at another family's Christmas

That's interesting. I am very much from the "heels indoors" family and so are most of my friends. I never thought about specifying dress code on Christmas invite for that reason. I assumed that smart casual was the norm when people pop into someone's house (any time of year).. Having said that, I don't care if people show up on my doorstep wearing whatever they feel comfortable in. Dressing up is not a requirement or an expectation. We have a saying in my friendship group "come as you are" which is our code for "just show up" - even if you are crying or covered in snot, not showered for three days because your cat just died, don't put up a front. You are welcome in any state and there is love and support and a bottle of alcohol waiting for you.

Ha good point! I like dressing up at Christmas as hardly ever get the chance to do it any more and makes it feel more 'special', I can see how people would feel a bit uncomfortable if normally in pjs

My DH finds it hilarious that my family does ‘Christmas clothes’. We go to church, pretty much everyone is dressed reasonably well therefore and our tradition was to go to a family member’s house so we’d be in decent clothes, nice jumper/dress. His family did not go to church so didn’t have this tradition. These days, I’m more likely to be in jeans and rarely see family at Christmas given the distance and my DH might be working. When he’s at home, he’ll be casually dressed, our focus will be walking the dogs.

As a child we dressed up for Christmas - I remember some gorgeous velvet dresses with pearly buttons fondly - but that was because we had lunch and teatime at my two different grandparents houses (they lived v close to each other). Now we don't go anywhere else on Christmas day and it's jeans and jumpers all day. I'd love to get dressed nicely (although not sure about heels indoors - will nobody think of the flooring?! 😁)

We do get dressed but in jeans and a Christmas jumper or a dress and wooly tights rather than something very formal.

We all get a bit more dressed up for Christmas eve mass, I might wear a dress (and then keep my coat on!), and DS2 (5) can still be persuaded to dress like a shepherd/angel etc. (DS1 won't but he will wear a Christmas jumper).

Not the point but those of you wearing jeans on Christmas Day, aren’t they uncomfortable after all the food?

I host at Christmas - usually between 12 and 16. I don't care what you wear in general, but if you show up in pyjamas you're not getting any dinner. It's fine if it's just the immediate family at home, but if you have guests or if you are a guest, it's disrespectful, IMHO.

We have been a real mixture over the years. In my family growing up, we would usually buy or plan a Xmas Day outfit, but i always wanted a new pair of pyjamas, which I would change into immediately after lunch.

I hate being uncomfortable and also hate being unshowered. My ideal is shower when i get up and nice pyjamas.

The usual these days is jeans and a 'nice' top/Xmas jumper, then I can hold off on the PJs to 7pm.

I dress up smart for practically everything anyway, even just to go out for a coffee. Always done it, all my adult life. Went to a friend's house last Christmas, host was in running gear from morning jog, stayed like that all day, rest of the family in PJs.

I have never worn pyjamas during the day in my 55 years, so I’m not going to start at Christmas! It baffles me how people see it either as such a treat to live in pyjamas or that they find normal clothes so difficult to wear!

We dress smart casual and comfortably . Don’t plan outfits, but def no nightwear in the day.

I’ve never worn pyjamas during the day (possibly because I wear a nightie to bed and I’d be cold). I don’t really understand the point. You’d have a shower and then put new pyjamas on, or the old ones you’ve just worn to bed? If you’re putting ones on, you might as well put proper clothes on.

I like dressing up for Christmas, don’t often get the chance to wear a sparkly frock these days!

I remember I used to have a 'Christmas Dress' when a child. It would be bought to wear on Christmas day and would then be my 'party' outfit for the year.

Pjs here. Brand new after a shower jobs

We don't go visiting or have people over though.
We don't cook either.

I love getting dressed up for christmas day - it stems from being a child and getting new clothes as one of my xmas presents. Sometimes it might have been a velvet dress but it could equally have been a lovely new jumper or flannel shirt and jeans. Having a bath with new shower gel, putting new clothes on (or dressy clothes that i don't normally wear) and having breakfast followed by champagne is part of the xmas day ritual once all the presents are opened. Apart from that - pjs is great from about 9pm on xmas day evening all through boxing day.

I tend to go for slightly nicer lounge wear, I have a gold theme this year. Pair of trousers i picked up in the summer sale.

Definitely remember dressing up as a child. I will do my hair and make up but want comfortable clothes for cooking or so I can play with DS or we can cwtch on the sofa.

PJs Christmas morning.

Sparkly posh outfit for visiting on Christmas afternoon/evening.

New PJs from Christmas night through to going for a walk on Boxing Day afternoon, at which point change into jeans and Christmas jumper.

Always dress up, always have and I hope I always will.

I'm always a bit puzzled by this. When I get up I need a shower to feel clean and fresh and energised. Obviously I put clean clothes on after a shower, not pj's. Plus pj's aren't very warm.

And Christmas is a bit of an occasion, so I'd normally be a bit dressed up. Not heels and full make up but tidy, maybe jeans with a new sweater, xmas socks etc. Comfortable and cheerful.

If I was invited out to lunch, I'd check dress code.

No, but I'm not keen of heavy carby meals and it's hard to over eat veggies and turkey.

Plus we go for a long walk through the lanes so digestion tends to sort itself out.

I never wear PJs during the day. I put them on when I go to bed and take them off when I get up and have a shower! I could never eat a meal (other than breakfast) wearing pyjamas, I'd feel like such a slob. Especially a big feast day meal like Christmas or Easter.

On Christmas Day we dress up a little bit compared to normal days - we go to church in the morning in any case, then the family gather for the big meal, and and usually go out for a walk in the afternoon.

I couldn't sit at a table or people I didn't know very well if they were in pyjamas. It would be a very uncomfortable experience. I don't care if they scrubbed themselves with bleach and wire wool before putting on brand new pyjamas, i would assume they were dirty clothes on dirty bodies. Comfortable fine, but actual clothes in front of guests. Be as scummy as you like in private.

Urgh. I hate people being in pyjamas all day. Feels as though everyone is ill or hungover. Plus, they're not exactly very warm.

You and your friends sound lovely

It’s pretty obvious from about a million threads that the biggest difference is between those families who actually understand the spirit of Christmas and are eager to spread goodwill and share good fortune, and those who genuinely believe it’s the greatest possible excuse for my little family and my child wouldn’t be able to relax if we invited a relative or acquaintance to spend the day with us. Some of the attitudes people seem able to reconcile with Christmas are horrifying.

But I’m in the ‘slob about in pyjamas until ten minutes before lunch’ camp.

This year I've invited a neighbour and her dog to join us for lunch, so I'll have to be up, dressed, tidy and with everything in the kitchen under control, by about 9.30. My ds will sleep until 11, post exams.

I'll be wearing an apron over tidy clothes, the bird will be in the oven on time, the ham and mince pies will have been baked in advance and Carol's from Kings will be playing. I'll hold off the Christmas fizz until she arrives.

I hope 😀