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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Hearts on WhatsApp

111 replies

Nayoryay33 · 08/12/2025 20:03

A dad of ds friends. Put a heart on our whatsapp convo.
The kids have known each other for a few years but became close this year. My ds went over for a sleepover at theirs a month ago. His wife is a nurse and works nights. He was at home with the boys. Very good communication, reassured me and ds all is well. Update at 11pm when ds fell asleep.

Now today, the boys went to an activity. Got dropped off by friends grandparent. I texted the dad saying i can pick them up. He replied "Oh that's amazing ❤️ Let me know if you need any help with that 😊"
Coming from the mum i would think its normal. From the dad?! Do dads communicate with hearts on WhatsApp normally? Am i being unreasonable in thinking he's being too familiar?

OP posts:
1983Louise · 09/12/2025 13:21

I always use hearts and kisses, I had to apologize to a plumber when I automatically put kisses on a message to him 😂

Laiste · 10/12/2025 08:41

Iseeyou99 · 09/12/2025 12:45

Were you both single and was he fanciable? At one point on my youth I would have been highly intrigued by that I'm embarrassed to say 🤗.

Show quote history

🤣
No and not really.
In his defence he was going through some dark times but ... 😳

We have a new electrician now.

AprilinPortugal · 10/12/2025 23:11

neednotknow · 08/12/2025 21:16

you're not colleagues though and this isn't teams

you should trust your gut and your pattern recognition

his wife is gone all night

you're single he knows this

this is escalation

he didnt 'like' the message with a heart

he added it to the main message 'blah blah blah ❤️'

he could have gone 🙏🏽 or nothing at all

im pretty sure he knows the difference

he is testing the boundary

Agree with this. Hearting a message is different to adding a heart to the message! And yes I was thinking the same, OP is single, wife works at night. But then I'm a cynical old bugger

StrawberrySquash · 10/12/2025 23:32

Iseeyou99 · 08/12/2025 20:28

No you are not overthinking.

Is he fantasizing over you? Well maybe not. But it does feel a little over familiar. You are right. Dismissal of ones reality is huge on MN btw.

I suggest just go a bit further the other way in your comms. So go formal, no kisses, no emojis, blunt facts - if you ever need to communicate again.

Don't tell me women on here would have no problem if they saw this from their husband to another mum.

Let's say OP is an attractive hot thing - then she could be the one facing passive aggressive wrath here. Be cautious just to be safe OP.

I personally don't like thumbs up because I see you can text someone about something really serious and heartfelt or slightly sensitive - and they then thumbs up. That makes me think ' dick'.

Trust yourself on this. Go formal all the way.

Show quote history

Oh no! I just skimmed back through a few texts in the group chat and married male friend has hearted similar messages to the OP's. I must warn his wife immediately

DarkForces · 10/12/2025 23:37

DD's school sent a handy decoder for emojis. Hearts are innocent, pretty much all the others, yikes! 😧

Ballondor · 11/12/2025 00:08

Totally normal.

My work colleagues, male and female, use hearts to confirm they agree with something or like it, via Teams.

NigelForage · 11/12/2025 03:24

The SCHOOL? How bloody odd. Di they think you're imbeciles @DarkForces

DarkForces · 11/12/2025 05:01

NigelForage · 11/12/2025 03:24

The SCHOOL? How bloody odd. Di they think you're imbeciles @DarkForces

It was after that Netflix show where there was cyber bullying. It's more that they had developed a whole new language via emojis that you needed to be able to decode so they sent the cypher... although I'm sure that's a short term fix. It's definitely made me look at the doughnut in a whole new light. Give me the ❤️ any day 😜

Original poster
Nayoryay33 · 14/12/2025 12:42

This is a 40 year old something man thats sending ❤️s. Not a teen.
Anyways.. Ive hearted all of his wifes messages this week, but none of his 😄 So i win ⭐️

OP posts:
Frogbear · 14/12/2025 14:49

Yet you complain his behaviour is like that of a teen…?

Endorewitch · 17/12/2025 23:32

Nayoryay33 · 14/12/2025 12:42

This is a 40 year old something man thats sending ❤️s. Not a teen.
Anyways.. Ive hearted all of his wifes messages this week, but none of his 😄 So i win ⭐️

Much ado about nothing. All he meant that he was giving heartfelt thanks!!Not only teens use hearts. Increasingly popular. Anyhow you feel better and he won't care either way,so problem solved

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