Does anyone have weekends like this anymore?

[Ranoutofideasfortheelves]

Friday night, got in, made chilli and nachos, fire on, throws on, pjs on, dh, me, dd (7) and ddog on the sofa watching films
Saturday, Dd did colouring in the morning, had pancakes, then her friend came to play, then she went to theirs for a few hours. I watched xmas films and sewed a top, Dh messed about on his computer.
I made lasagna and Dd came home, we had a dance to Christmas music then watched Home alone and bed.
Today we took ddog out to the woods, dd did clay, we made chocolate Christmas tree biscuits and played with her elves, played in the garden on the trampoline with the elves, had a roast, bath, fire, stories & bed.

Just been looking at Instagram etc and so many posts of visits to cities, girls nights out, santa spectacular shows, Lapland, London visits etc and just feeling a bit 😬
We will do a few Christmas outings for sure, but don’t seem half as busy (or wealthy)as lots of people. I remember lots of weekends as a kid being slow, but I was perfectly happy. We definitely do a lot more with Dd than I did as a kid, but do most of you do these kind of outings most weekends? Is Dd missing out?

A bit strange to assume that "more don't do it". It's a pretty typical weekend plan for people with young children.

Photos of typical weekends at home don't often make it to Instagram, while pictures of Disneyland trips almost certainly will, and tend to get bumped higher in your algorithm. Not sure what's difficult to understand about that.

I detect a tiny bit of reverse snobbery here, but it might just be that you don't know how Instagram works.

I have older kids now but they remember the nice weekends at home just pottering around watching xmas movies and doing up the tree more than they remember any of the ridiculously expensive santa 'experiences' I have paid for over the years. If I could go back in time to the parent going wild looking for matching pjs and doing xmas eve boxes etc I would slap myself because they got more joy on christmas eve making a bowl of 'reindeer food' and throwing it around the garden than spending hours with loads of other people doing the same christmas things. For me I genuinely thought I was doing it for them but I realise now it was possibly just for show all truth be told. I no longer post on social media and no longer need the validation I once did so I have grown with the kids in that respect. Nobody is a perfect parent.

But if you genuinely are scraping by, trying to make the best of what you have, why the unnecessary level of detail making your post sound like the latest John Lewis Christmas ad?

Some of us would kill for a weekend like this. I'm working more or less straight through my weekends at the moment, desperately trying to hold onto my job so I can pay my mortgage.

I'm incredibly envious of people who have time to spend with their kids. I can live with people being happy with their weekends and celebrating them. But the "oh woe look at me, snuggling up with my lovely family drinking hot chocolate and watching Home Alone, what am I doing wrong?" just seemed almost like it was designed to elicit posts saying "you're fine".

I'm probably over-sensitive, but it came across as smug and tone deaf.

My weekend went like this: Friday night- school Christmas fair, spent volunteering on a stall for the good of the PTA. Saturday morning husband did the food shop, oldest stayed home to do homework and I took youngest to the Christmas tree festival in a local church, more for me than for them. Free entry and within 5 minutes they were bored but I got at least 30 minutes out of it with the help of some mince pies. Entirety of Saturday afternoon spent watching oldest train doing her sport of choice, like out of the house for almost 4.5 hours. Yesterday I had panto tickets, husband is not into panto, so just me and the kids. Almost jogged through town from the car park to the theatre, it was 11am start and we left later than intended and the traffic was rubbish on the drive over. Did arrive before it started and the panto was fun, it's a win. We did have a nice late lunch afterwards and then browsed shops for an hour in the rain. I was trying to buy a few bits for Christmas, but having both kids present made it somewhat challenging. Then home to coerce the oldest child to finish any remaining homework. I am sure in instagram all this would have looked entirely different. Honestly I would have quite liked an afternoon on the sofa with some Christmas films, sounds very chill.

Why don’t more do it though? She has school all week, dance mid week one night, plays with friends or playground spring/summer nights, but winter we just take dog out and then in for dinner. Everyone seems to do so much

They're just choosing to spend their time differently doing more active stuff. Whereas you're choosing to spend your time writing overly descriptive prose about your humble but painfully wholesome weekend in a transparent effort to garner validation.

But thankfully this is still Mumsnet not Netmums. Be grateful it's not 2011 OP as you'd have been verbally mauled so much worse than this.

@Ranoutofideasfortheelves

the only thing I can think is that there wasn’t much time for you Op to do what you want. Whether that be go to a gym class action or go for a drink with your mate. Same for husband. A weekend doesn’t need to be family time the full two days and nights.

It's a normal weekend? My parents never took me anywhere but admittedly we didn't have all these fun things to do for the families that we have here now. It's a big money making business and I'm afraid it spoils our children who then grow up expecting constant entertainment (and the money to spend on it).

Apologies if someone else has asked you this already but what show did you see in London please ?

So many bitchy comments, no one has any idea of other’s circumstances, I’m out.

My sister posted on Instagram yesterday. It was about her trip to see the London lights and Selfridges. Looked stunning but crowded. No “personal” photos, just views. The reality is - our other sister has died leaving a teenager. She took him along with her children but kept that part private. So she was “documenting” her day (she has a creative/media career too) but not too personally. People close to her know how the weekend went, others just see impersonal images.

My kids are all adults so I probably shouldn't be posting here. Just wanted to say that I still don't know what people get out of Instagram. Facebook is more than enough for me . I don't get why people use Instagram .other than if they've got a business that it's advertising.

Hi Karen 😉
Mine too, I thought Instagram was originally going to be image-based and that sounded good to me as a creative-type person - I hated all the Facebook thing. What I naively didn’t realise was - that was all fake too! But airbrushed fake rather than wholesome fake.

Your weekend sounds fine and nice and lots of people have said it is. You don't need validation by criticism of other people's weekends which is what you seem to want?

What a fabulous weekend. I am all in with your schedule. I think all these things people do can be great, but also a massive costly disappointment. Nothing beats your weekend. December is busy enough.

I didn't take your post as a humble brag OP. Possibly because it's how I feel as well. It's not even social media, it's all the school mums and dads talking about their busy weekends, Lapland Uk, or other Santa visits, pantos, etc. They sound lovely and I worry my dc will feel they are missing out as they get older as we can't afford to do all those things. Also after working all week and with a ton of chores to do our energy levels right now are low and they're lucky to even do their clubs or go to the park. I'd hibernate all winter if I could!

@Ithinkofawittyusernamethenforgetit thanks yes I'm even more persuaded it's a waste of time now. I spend too much time lurking in Mumsnet so deffo no time for any other social media. Happy Christmas 🎄 x

No, you're definitely not alone!

I got that vibe also. It had smarmy written all over it.

I am in a happy relationship but I was single for 7 years prior to that.

The OP has just rubbed single, childless people's noses in it and knows she has at that. Asking people if her weekend sounds boring knowing full well there are lonely people out there who would crave that type of weekend.

One thing you can't be in life is smug

I got that vibe also. It had smarmy written all over it.

I am in a happy relationship but I was single for 7 years prior to that.

The OP has just rubbed single, childless people's noses in it and knows she has at that. Asking people if her weekend sounds boring knowing full well there are lonely people out there who would crave that type of weekend.

One thing you can't be in life is smug

I’m glad I no longer use SM. It isn’t real. It’s a small snapshot and of course people only post the absolute best parts of life. I’ve seen how people kill themselves to get the ‘perfect’ contrived shots of their families on days out. Just remember they were probably shouting either side of the perfect family shot and it took like 150 takes or they have a Google pixel.

Step 1: Delete Social Media

Step 2: Live your life for at least a year without its influence on your mind (the extent of which you may nit even be aware of).

Step 3: Ask yourself if you've had a good year.

A (not-so-stealthy) boast post this one

Great new year resolution - Mumsnet is going too.

Your weekend sounds perfect. So much 1:10 time . Chilled fun inexpensive

Comparison is the thief of joy!
My two are older now so our weekend consisted of dropping the eldest at work, then walking the dog, cleaning the bathroom, hoovering and getting the washing done.
The youngest (14) rose from his pit at 2pm and promptly went to his mates until around 9pm.
Picked up the eldest and watched re runs of stranger things with him
Sunday gave us the ironing pile, more walking the dog, had to do a bit of work, kids fended for themselves most of the day, they were in and out to mates houses or they all came here. Decided to have a bottle of wine and a few gins, regretting it this morning.
Very dull here!
When they were little it would have been football on a saturday morning, friends and/or dog walk on a saturday afternoon and a lot of weekends we went to the beach on a sunday for a bracing fresh air dog walk and home for a roast. One weekend in december we would see Santa somewhere and there would have been a football xmas party for each kid at some point but thats it!