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Original poster

Should I report my ex for driving with 9 points?

40 replies

SoldieringOnagain · 07/12/2025 21:36

My ex is an HGV driver. He treated me with contempt and has recently me someone new.
I know I’m being really spiteful but I’m hurt, so badly, I want to report him to make him hurt too.
He is somehow getting away with driving with 9 points on his license as he is self employed but works via an agency. Why am I feeling so angry and am I justified in wanting to hurt him?

OP posts:
metalbottle · 07/12/2025 21:37

Car drivers can drive with 9 points, the ban is at 12. Are the rules different for an HGV?

Original poster
SoldieringOnagain · 07/12/2025 21:39

metalbottle · 07/12/2025 21:37

Car drivers can drive with 9 points, the ban is at 12. Are the rules different for an HGV?

Yes they are not covered by insurance

OP posts:
Umy15r03lcha1 · 07/12/2025 21:41

Well if he's breaking the law you can report him. He sounds careless and dangerous.

CalmShaker · 07/12/2025 21:41

Move on op, forget him

ItsOnlyHobnobs · 07/12/2025 21:44

Is he a newly qualified HGV driver? less than two years qualified?

Because if he is not, it remains 12 points, and even with that is not an automatic disqualification.

I don’t think you should report him in retaliation, only if you have very genuine concerns for safety, and even then I think it may be best to walk away entirely from this man.

Arlanymor · 07/12/2025 21:45

You can drive an HGV with 12 points.

metalbottle · 07/12/2025 21:53

SoldieringOnagain · 07/12/2025 21:39

Yes they are not covered by insurance

Show quote history

Then yes of course report.

OneKhakiFish · 07/12/2025 21:55

My friend ended up with 12 points at court, they let him continue to drive because he would have lost his job if he lost his driving license

CandiedPrincess · 07/12/2025 21:56

I'm not sure that it's correct that they're not covered by insurance. I'd double check that.

CandiedPrincess · 07/12/2025 21:57

But also doing it out of spite because he's with someone new is really very petty. Will it make you feel better? I doubt it very much. Just move on.

Newyearawaits · 07/12/2025 21:57

Don't report him

Christmas2025 · 07/12/2025 21:58

CandiedPrincess · 07/12/2025 21:56

I'm not sure that it's correct that they're not covered by insurance. I'd double check that.

I'm thinking he's recently been given the points perhaps and not yet informed the insurance or has no intention of informing them?

WrigglyDonCat · 07/12/2025 21:59

ItsOnlyHobnobs · 07/12/2025 21:44

Is he a newly qualified HGV driver? less than two years qualified?

Because if he is not, it remains 12 points, and even with that is not an automatic disqualification.

I don’t think you should report him in retaliation, only if you have very genuine concerns for safety, and even then I think it may be best to walk away entirely from this man.

If you are referring to less than two years because of the New Drivers Act, then that actually only applies from the date you get your first full licence. So if you have a car licence for 2 years and then get a cat C, it doesn't apply. And I think you have to have a cat B and be at least 18 to do a cat C, so it's extremely unlikely the 2 year rule would apply to most drivers.

FOJN · 07/12/2025 22:00

Would being spiteful actually make you feel better? How would you know how hurt he feels?

Don't do it, you might feel satisfied for a brief period but the hurt will return and future you will regret it. Save yourself the trouble and resist the temptation to punish him.

RightOnTheEdge · 07/12/2025 22:01

It's not illegal but a lot of places won't hire someone with more than 6 points because it's a condition of their insurance.

I imagine it's tempting OP but you should just be glad hes an ex and move on with your life.
If he's got that many points he's likely to get himself banned eventually anyway. Let him ruin his own life.

DC285 · 07/12/2025 22:06

If he has invalidated his insurance then yes, report, because driving without valid insurance is an incredibly selfish and dangerous thing to do. If it’s just a requirement for him to be able to do his job then no, that’s just petty and vindictive.

caringcarer · 07/12/2025 22:31

Umy15r03lcha1 · 07/12/2025 21:41

Well if he's breaking the law you can report him. He sounds careless and dangerous.

If he is a bad driver on the road in charg of an HGV then report him. Make the motorways safer.

Lmnop22 · 07/12/2025 22:42

I don’t agree with driving without proper insurance if it really is invalidated but reporting him is just going to make you a bitter ex who is lashing out at him because he moved on with someone else. It won’t actually make you feel better.

MrsPinkSky · 07/12/2025 22:48

You want to report him because he's met someone new?

And what about when that little buzz wears off?

Are you going to sit and plot lots of other ways to get back at him for being happy?

You'd be better off putting all that energy into taking care of you.

Vodka1 · 07/12/2025 23:11

I get it. But no, don't screw with how someone makes a living just because he's got a new GF.

You will feel better in time, the anger will go, and you may regret it.

I hope you heal soon. ❤

Original poster
SoldieringOnagain · 08/12/2025 02:10

Christmas2025 · 07/12/2025 21:58

I'm thinking he's recently been given the points perhaps and not yet informed the insurance or has no intention of informing them?

Show quote history

He has no intention of telling them. The last 6 points were for driving without due care and attention when he stayed up all night, fell asleep at the wheel and crashed into the rear of a car

OP posts:
LemonSqueezy0 · 08/12/2025 02:28

SoldieringOnagain · 08/12/2025 02:10

He has no intention of telling them. The last 6 points were for driving without due care and attention when he stayed up all night, fell asleep at the wheel and crashed into the rear of a car

Show quote history

So when he does the same again, and kills someone, how would you feel then?

Rather you do the right thing, for the wrong reason, in a case like this... Just be prepared that it won't give you the closure on the relationship, that you might hope. But you are doing the right thing by reporting...

JacquesHarlow · 08/12/2025 02:36

You need to focus on healing @SoldieringOnagain . This isn’t it.

Random question - do you share children with this man?

AutumnLeavesFallingFast · 08/12/2025 02:40

He treated you with contempt, why be sad he's met someone bew. Feel sorry for the woman & move forward with your life. Honestly, move forward '& don't waste your energy/life seeking revenge.

EDIT: forgot to add, reporting him
is probably in other road users best interest though. So yeah, you should. If he's driving/insured legally, no harm done. If he isn't it's another fuck wit off the road.

araiwa · 08/12/2025 03:05

I thought you only told insurance of new points at renewal

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