I hate christmas

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Things I hate about Christmas …

the routine.
things we have done for the last 30 odd years. Not because any of it is pleasurable but because that’s What We Do. Any suggestion there is a comfortable change is met with absolute horror. Fuckers.

the expectation that we have to see everyone on one day. Most of these people I don’t see from one year to the next. Some of them I don’t even like. Hundreds of them. and they try and hug or kiss ffs. Why? Why would they do that?

In the car, out, sit cramped and loud, exchange presents nobody gives a shite about and are destined for the charity shop. On to the next house and repeat.
this sounds nasty and ungrateful but really, what shit can you buy for a tenner for someone you don’t like much? WHAT’S THE POINT????
Too many people in each house. So many.

Too many presents. I get it. He likes it. He’s passed on this to the DCs and they like it. Everyone is kind and generous but I hate it.
Too. Much.
and then it sits in piles for days and days. And the expectation that I join in and do the same.

ancient in-laws with dementia. Crankier by the year. I do love them but why do they always have to come to us when there are numerous other relatives they could go to. But no, This Is What We Do. Again. And FiL will bang on about the dead dog again (and again and again).

The timings.
because He does the cooking he gets to decide what happens when.

I DO NOT WANT TO EAT A FULL MEAL AT 3 PM.

That is neither lunch nor dinner. I will be hungry at a normal time. That means I either have to stay hungry and drink on an empty stomach, or eat and then I’m not hungry for the feast.

somebody will leave chocolate out and the dog will eat it resulting in yet another vet trip. Again. FiL I’m looking at you.

after a day of merriment He will proceed to drink too much. Mostly in response to having to deal with the ancient relatives. And then he will peacefully go to sleep in a chair while I clear up.

NOBODY LIKES SPROUTS

the last 10 years I have volunteered to work. Which is shitty but an excellent reason to bugger off for a few hours. This year I haven’t got work as an excuse. On the other hand no work means I can drink myself into oblivion but then risk actuallly murdering people.

Sounds like a miserable life. Nothing more I hate in life is being forced and obligated to people. I don’t see or visit a single person that I don’t like. Dh and I don’t prescribe to that.
how wonderful it would be to divorce him and never see or do any of that OP. Surely life is much more than this?

Also.

LED tree lights. Neon bastards brighter than the sun

Sounds awful. Fuck that for a game of dominoes.

Next year I’m off to a nice all inclusive in the sun

I think you should book next year away. Tell your dh you're going, you need a change or you're going to murder someone. Then he can decide where he would rather be.

Something has to change.

Yeah Christmas like that sounds like a fucking nightmare. I'd hate it too if it was like that every year!

A comedian once said that Christmas is that time of the year when you have to see the people you've spent all year trying to avoid. Sounds about right

Can’t stand it either.

I don’t know why. It’s the build up and routines and rituals of it all that maybe gets to me.

as you say “It’s What We Do”.

Just makes me sigh. With despair.

I liked it when the kids were little but now it feels like a lot of fuss for nothing, I don’t even like turkey.

this year we are going out. You’ve only got one life OP. Maybe put your foot down. And say no?

Why couldn't you come to a compromise years ago when it became a thing you did together?

Sounds like you don’t like your ‘D’H dictating to you what happens at Christmas rather than not liking Christmas.

Sorry but this is in your control and you CAN change it.

We just do what we fancy each yr.
Never been one to traips around multiple houses on Xmas day

I do feel for you. We're doing away with tradition this year and heading out for a nice long run and a boot buffet in the car with a few nice nibbles. We'll get home, light the fire, open some bubbly and have a nice relaxing evening with some yummy snacks. Maybe not everyone's cup of tea but it's actually the first Christmas I'm really looking forward to.

With you, except for the sprouts 😋😋😋

DH and I both agreed that would not be our Christmas as soon as our DD was born and we stuck to it. I definitely see how it would be awful to be out of sync with your spouse on this issue.

Hate is a very strong word. I very much dislike Christmas myself and find ways to negotiate it depending on circumstance and have done so from a quite young age.

I always found either working or volunteering far preferable when given a choice. Otherwise I've sucked it up with 'grace' and 'excused' myself from the festivities at my soonest convenience.

The whole shebang is rather gross but it gives too many people some rare pleasures for me to actually hate it.

I like sprouts 😄

But otherwise, you're not wrong. But, you can change it! Why do you have to do your DHs thing every year? What would you like to do? If that's an ai in the sun, then that's what you do next year. Most couples compromise in some way at Christmas, he doesn't get to choose something you don't enjoy every year!

Say you are working and just go out on your own for hours?
Honestly though, just change it. It doesn't HAVE to be like this at all. You are entitled to an equal say in things. I'd suggest a holiday next year personally.

I love sprouts, but other than that yanbu. I don't buy Adults presents for Christmas, and have not done so for years. They can buy what they really like themselves. So many presents that people receive, just end up cluttering up the place, or in the charity shops, imo.

Omg, life is too short. Break free of your shackles! YOU HAVE FREE WILL! Rise up!

But yabu, sprouts are god-tier.

Get a grip, OP! Who’s in charge here?? Take back control and start calling the shots, for pity’s sake!

YABU

Make it what you want it.

When you put it like that it does sound fucking dreadful. I’m glad that while my Christmas isn’t perfect it isn’t as shit as that. The key is compromise. If people refuse to do that then that’s a problem for them. Just don’t engage and do things you want to do the way you want to do them. I will never understand people (like my MIL for example, who I love btw) martyring themselves because otherwise certain people will be “upset”.

Next year I am rising up.

This is the last year of this total bollocks.

there are good bits, nice bits, great bits. But …

I hate it too.

Every year I’m pretty much forced to host and cook a massive meal, organise gifts for everyone, sort out sleeping arrangements and buy all of the food.

This year I LTB and my parents aren’t speaking to me so I’m not doing any of it.

The relief is insane.

I’m working Christmas Day and Boxing Day and I’m perfectly happy with that decision.

I'll join the club. About once every 4 years would be about right.

I hate the WASTE, the tat, the mindless spending and hauls and shite from Temu and Shein and Amazon. Gifts bought out of obligation, not because someone needs/wants that particular thing. All the shite like elf on the shelf, santa trains, north pole breakfasts and the rest of the shite designed to make parents - well, mums really - feel crap and guilty for not buying into it.

The fecking awful light display on my neighbour's hedge.

The music - don't get me started on the music. The same shitty pop songs for 50 fucking years. Just go away, Noddy Holder and take Shaking Stevens with you.

What I hate most is that people lose all ability to talk/think about anything else. And there are even people who start the build-up around February.