To ask what you're dreading most about Christmas with your inlaws this year? ( lighthearted )

[BossaNovaOnAllNight]

I know its a time of year for giving and being with each other but let's be real, the people we spend christmas with don't magically have a personality transplant just because of the date on the calendar. What are you already anticipating will wind you up this Christmas? I'll go first, DH'S grandmother noticing everyone's weight ( gain, loss anything ) and bringing it up just before dinner when we are all about to eat a ton. DSIL will undoubtedly say something my autism finds unacceptable, like she's lied about something not arriving from Etsy and got a refund from a small business . Oh and I truly do not want to go on a huge family walk in the freezing cold really, I run daily and want a day off. As I say, this is light hearted and I will have a lovely time and I can't wait to see my in-laws but its a full on few days haha. Aibu to ask what you're dreading?

Here we go
Why botherr seeing them then?

🍿bump for your thread + see how long it stays light-hearted.👍😁

Oh give over lol I clearly said light hearted- doesn't mean I don't enjoy Christmas with them but there's elements we all dread.

I hope so too lol, but we all need somewhere to vent!

Would you like a cup of tea?
Are you sure you don’t want a cup of tea?
Would you like a biscuit?
A cup of tea and a biscuit?

The jokes my father in law attempts! Apart from that looking forward to it. Great food, good company, great gifts and always wine and chocolate at the end of the evening and when we leave all left over boxes of chocolate, crackers etc get gifted to us as mother in law starts diet the next day. For that I'll put up with the attempt at jokes. Do need some good jokes if mn can help

Hahahahahahahaha

Nothing! They take us out for a lovely meal at a restaurant and won't hear of us contributing. Ask for Amazon links for what we'd like them to buy us (and if it costs less than £150 they want to know what else we need!). Beam with pride at their gorgeous grandchildren and ask after the dogs.

My own extended family, however... 🤐

My MIL doesn’t speak English. I speak her language but I’m not fluent so after a couple of hours my brain wants to slide from ear and skulk away. DD is fluent so she or DH take over if I need a break.

And I need frequent breaks. She is lovely though so that makes it easier.

The hugging. I'm just not a hugger but we have to a full round of everybody hugging everybody in the hall when we arrive and when we leave. They know I'm not a hugger (been with DH 25 years so I'm not a novelty) but apparently I can't be left out. I do like them all and enjoy the Christmas gathering, but I do wish we could dispense with the speed-dating style forced hugs.

There's no Christmas pudding and it makes me so sad, none of them like it 😭

I don’t drink much so am happy to be the designated driver over the festive period. My MIL always forces glasses of non-alcoholic wine on me, even though I don’t even drink actual wine. Can I just have a Pepsi Max? No, I have to “treat” myslef to a glass of sickly chemicals that tastes like peach shower gel.

My brother and sister in law with their lovely calm neurotypical children judging my ADHD not at all calm children, and by extension judging our parenting of them.

Ah, we all need a grumble sometimes. Anyone taking this thread too seriously needs to go touch some grass. Or maybe join us for that tea - and a biscuit?

For me it's my MIL demanding to know how I lost weight, and don't I look so much better now (aka I looked shit when I was fat). My FIL making "jokes" about me being a vegetarian. I've heard them all before. And I take my own food when I go there as otherwise there's nothing for me to eat!

They're not terrible people - they're just not my people. I will make an effort as they're my children's grandparents, smile and nod and try to change the subject to something more fun, like... politics... or religion...

My in laws house is freezing! Last time we went the thermostat was set at 11 degrees. I asked if we could turn it on so we were permitted to 'boost' it for an hour, then not again for 6 hours.

So sorry to hear this- you're not alone. Dsil is a teacher and talks for hours about how hard it is to teach SEN children who 'shouldn't be in a mainstream school' and how their parents want them labelled for benefits. DH's grandmother agrees with her and I feel sick with worry that her attitude is representative of what all teachers really think of the SEN kids in my family. Nobody expects to have SEN kids until they do and nobody knows how bloody hard it is, I really take my hat off to you. If they judge then let them, their ignorance won't get them far in other parts of life and although they might judge your kids, i garuntee people judge them for how closed minded they are as these attitudes often leak out into other conversations in life x

Absolutely nothing to dread. Love my family and all my in laws and really looking forward to seeing them all

Whether they say the same about me though, not sure 😕

Roasting alive as they have their thermostat set really high. Add in a double oven going and a full house of people and I’m so hot, I wear a light tshirt and pop my head out the back door every so often but it’s still unbearable 🥵

We are hosting the ILs again this year which means they will be here with their ‘babies’ , the most neurotic, untrained chihuahuas ever to set foot on earth. Bobcat and Timotei. Aristotle passed away in August but they are bringing his ashes in a little treasure chest (MIL got this made by her ‘crafty’ friend it’s covered in diamanté) so he can still participate 😬 (can’t complain really as last year his participation in Christmas seemed to be some kind of mission to impregnate soft furnishings🤮).

We have been told that we must not just stand up we have to tell them first so they can pick up bobcat and timotei as sudden standing startles them apparently. They also have new festive doggy dishes for their Christmas dinner. They usually wear Christmas outfits (which actually do look cute although they are not cute they are feral wide eyed little devil dogs 😂). I’ll try to get a picture this year if they consent 😂

Oh yes! For this reason (among others) I have asked for a heated throw this Christmas.

pack your thermals!

Nooooo not the one hour! 😆 Nothing worse than a freezing house! I'd rather have no presents and a warm place to be if cost is an issue lol

The oversized excessive number of presents in effort to best grandparents it’s exhausting and shallow

First Christmas since FIL died and I’m dreading the empty space. I’m dreading him not being there to be grumpy when it all gets too loud. I’m dreading going to the house and him not offering me an alcoholic drink regardless of the hour.

My sister is coming and she will definitely get drunk, then be thoroughly obnoxious in any games we play, insisting she is right about everything. Actually thinking about it, maybe I will say there’s no quiz or any cards etc, as I’m hosting!

I’m fond of my husband’s family, but by God, they’re dull. We do have a laugh, but only once they’ve gone home and we talk about the highlights of the day’s unbelievably boring conversations. I don’t know how my husband ended up so normal.