To be so annoyed with bloody paternalistic NHS

[MyKindHiker]

I am a lifetime migraine sufferer and as I'm getting closer to menopause they are getting worse in frequency and severity. At least half of all days I wake up with some form of aura, go through packs of nurofen and sumatriptan. Anyways it's been years since I considered any intervention other than just taking meds when one coming on (not necessary as not that frequent through adulthood), but I gather from talking to others there are some really effective meds available now which can prevent them entirely.

Go to GP who looks at recent bloodwork done to check my hormones and says as I'm still fertile and having periods, he can't prescribe in case I get pregnant while on them. I explain I have 2 kids and don't want more. In fact, can't technically have more anyway due to birth injury with second. And husband has had vasectomy to prevent accidental pregnancy as due to birth injury I could get pregnant but couldn't carry baby to anywhere near term. Which is beside the point as I do not want any more kids anyway.

Anyway doc says I still can't have the meds and the rule is for women of childbearing age the rule is they need to go to a special clinic with a 12 month waiting list and do all the steps first (elimination diet etc... I have TRIED THIS OVER 30 YEARS) and prove I'm not pregnant.

I mean what is with these people? If I was a man, I would have just got the meds to prevent a very debilitating condition. But because I'm a woman I can't have the meds 'in case' I become pregnant as though I'm just a uterus on legs who can't think for myself and decide not to become pregnant? Why is my word not enough that I will not have an affair with a non-vasectomied man and get myself up the spout. Ridiculous.

Are you on contraception?

If you were on contraception (they can’t factor in your husband’s vasectomy as they look at you as a separate entity!) they would prescribe

I don't understand what you're not understanding.

That men can't get pregnant?

Could you have a hysterectomy to prevent pregnancy, therefore putting you on an even footing with men?

No - in your 40s (I have been told) you are no longer allowed the contraceptive pill due to hormones and risks. Hence husband has had a vasectomy. Which is contraception. And if I had an affair with anyone (which I won't), I would use barrier methods. Or take the morning after pill.

If I could just mail order a hysterectomy I would do. But it's not that easy, you can't just ask for one just because.

I assume the meds cause birth defects (?)
Can you have your tubes tied and go back?

unfortunately generally contraception makes migraines worse/more frequent so it’s very much a catch 22 to have that be a factor. I’m so sorry OP this is awful. I do not understand why we, as adult women, cannot be trusted to take medication we need to help us just live and not get pregnant!
I know so few people who have babies “by accident” many are unexpected as in we weren’t trying but we weren’t doing all we could to prevent it but this makes it sound like you have 12 unplanned children and can’t be trusted not to go again!!

No, you are missing the point.

She is an adult woman, capable of managing her own fertility who should not need to prove to the medical system that she is not or will not become pregnant.

And yes it's an effing disgrace that a man in the same circumstances wouldn't have to wait at all. The solution would be a simple waiver form where you sign saying that you understand the risks and accept the consequences.

But that's major surgery - husband had a vasectomy so I wouldn't need to do that. Surely my own free will to not get pregnant should be sufficient?

The reality is if through some fluke of nature I got pregnant, I would need to terminate anyway as I couldn't carry a baby past first trimester.

Yes, the pill. They stopped prescribing when I was 37. So that's when husband got snipped.

What medication is this OP?

Because of your migraines? Not as a policy for all women in their 40s presumably?!

Is it topiramate?

If so, you're not missing anything. Dreadful drug, I was being tested for blood cancers and other diseases because the side effects were so bad and the GP couldn't see how it could be that. It was.

Your GP is totally incorrect on this, you need to go and see a different GP at the practice or another surgery for a different opinion. You should be able to get first line treatments from your GP no issue. They should also be looking at your usage of Sumatriptan and Painkillers as these can cause medication over use headache. Usually you need to try at least two first line treatments such a beta blockers and atogeopant before you'll be referred to a neurologist. Go back and see another doctor urgently!

They’re pretty reluctant to let women have a hysterectomy, even with extreme debilitating symptoms so there’d be no chance for migraines.

It’s so annoying OP. I’d be tempted to make another appointment and take your DH with you, maybe if he confirms he doesn’t want anymore kids the GP will relent!

I was told it was (again by a male doctor? Maybe others have had different experiences?). Husband really wasn't keen on the snip so I did try to argue my case given I'm fit and healthy and no side effects but they were firm I wasn't allowed it any more.

A man wouldn't be in the same circumstance!

They can't get pregnant.

Sodium Valproate is usually the medication they give you that has a high risk of birth defects and they do try to avoid using it in childbearing age women. It's usually only proscribed by a Neurologist though.

Yes - my GP stopped combined hormone pill late 30’s. Think I was 38 or 39. Offered the coil instead but I wasn’t so keen on that. I think they let you take the mini pill into your 40’s but definitely not keen on prescribing the combined pill once your older.

Hormone-based ones yes, that was what I've been told. The docs stopped prescribing the pill when I was 37. I did double check with another who agreed.

Obviously we can use barrier methods but as I still technically could get pregnant that wouldn't help in this case.

what the migraine meds they’ve said no to op?