To be so annoyed with bloody paternalistic NHS

[MyKindHiker]

I am a lifetime migraine sufferer and as I'm getting closer to menopause they are getting worse in frequency and severity. At least half of all days I wake up with some form of aura, go through packs of nurofen and sumatriptan. Anyways it's been years since I considered any intervention other than just taking meds when one coming on (not necessary as not that frequent through adulthood), but I gather from talking to others there are some really effective meds available now which can prevent them entirely.

Go to GP who looks at recent bloodwork done to check my hormones and says as I'm still fertile and having periods, he can't prescribe in case I get pregnant while on them. I explain I have 2 kids and don't want more. In fact, can't technically have more anyway due to birth injury with second. And husband has had vasectomy to prevent accidental pregnancy as due to birth injury I could get pregnant but couldn't carry baby to anywhere near term. Which is beside the point as I do not want any more kids anyway.

Anyway doc says I still can't have the meds and the rule is for women of childbearing age the rule is they need to go to a special clinic with a 12 month waiting list and do all the steps first (elimination diet etc... I have TRIED THIS OVER 30 YEARS) and prove I'm not pregnant.

I mean what is with these people? If I was a man, I would have just got the meds to prevent a very debilitating condition. But because I'm a woman I can't have the meds 'in case' I become pregnant as though I'm just a uterus on legs who can't think for myself and decide not to become pregnant? Why is my word not enough that I will not have an affair with a non-vasectomied man and get myself up the spout. Ridiculous.

Most people I know who deal with chronic or less common health conditions do tell their GP what they want, because usually they are actually more well-informed on that one niche subject - and new medications and treatments - than their doctor. The doctor then uses their medical knowledge to check the validity of the patients' suggestions, before going ahead with what the patient wants.

As for alcohol, there is no known safe amount of alcohol to drink while pregnant. And of course, while you said you only drank one small glass a week, you could have been lying - after all, how can you be trusted not to drink a bottle a day while pregnant? Or, what if a woman drinks heavily before she even realises she's pregnant at 4, 6, or even 8 weeks? The risk of fetal alcohol syndrome, a life long disability, could be quite high.

So unless you'd like to be hypocritical, either women should be banned from drinking alcohol, or, fertile women should be allowed to take teratogenic medications so long as they understand the risks, declare they understand they will need to abort any pregnancy, and have a solid contraceptive plan of some sort (whether it's their husband's vasectomy, or the pill.)

Just to say, going on to high dose HRT patch has ended my migraines and I have not had a single headache

My private meno constant explained my migraine was caused by hormone levels changing upland down
So the higher dose keeps them stable?

It's like a minor miracle for me...

For most of history women have drunk alcohol during pregnancy. I drank a glass a week because it was the 80s and drinking wine - or alcohol of any sort - every day or every night was not a thing. It was a Friday night treat - because wine was relatively expensive compared with wages. Also, I have kept a diary since 1975 and what did will be in it - I tell my diary the truth (pointless otherwise to keep it) - so I could (I won't, real hassle of unpacking boxes) look up exactly what I did during both pregnancies. A small glass of wine (125ml) a week was the recommendation for alcohol during pregnancy at the time. When I became pregnant (much wanted child) my GP suggested opening bottle of champagne btw - he did not suggest I should not have any!
Yes, if you know about your condition you can talk about medication, but it is stil your GP making sure it is safe for you, not you.
I don't see any connection between social drinking among fertile women and deliberately taking teratogenic medicine - I remember thalidomide (and in the 80s took nothing to stop morning sickness or any other problem during pregnancy - doctors would not prescribe such things, either - tea and dry biscuits works well). Migraine I took to bed in a dark room, having had sweet tea - and practised relaxation techniques.
Foolish women drink to excess - we cannot legislate for every foolish thing people do.

You're entitled to be hypocritical if you like, but being so in such a blatant manner makes your entire argument discardable. You clearly aren't arguing from a position of rationality.

That is completely wrong. Check the Nice guidelines. I’m 49 and have only just come off the combined Pill. My (female) GP has always said I can stay on the Pill till 50 and move straight to HRT. Another friend has been on the mini pill till late 40s. i don’t know anything about migraines sorry and it looks like others are giving better advice about those. Maybe you’re not supposed to take the Pill with migraines? (Clutching at straws - I’d be livid at that GP)

My niece was not prescribed Roaccutane due to possible pregnancies. She is a lesbian who has never had, nor ever would have, sex with a man.

Hi OP,

Hope you don't mind us popping our head round the door to say that we've got a survey running at the moment that covers some of the issues described in this thread. We're trying to find out more about women's experiences of the NHS ahead of a campaign we'll be launching next year around medical misogyny. If anyone has a spare ten minutes we'd be grateful for responses - you can fill it in here https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/LMSR528

Thanks,
MNHQ

I have a lot of sympathy with you, OP, but given the number of women who say their pregnancy is due to contraceptive failure, I can understand why they take the line that they do.

Incidentally, one of my oldest friends (we are in our 60s) had debilitating migraines for years. It is now under control for the first time due to Botox. Because she has it for medical reasons it is paid for by the NHS.

It might be worth enquiring whether that is an option for you.

All surgery has risk, some more than others. From experience having tubal ligation had minimal recovery time. We went for a coffee on the way home from mine.

So your laproscopic surgery was easy, while I was in agony thanks to the Co2. Um, great?

That has nothing to do with my point, which was that it carries far more risk than vasectomy, as it involves cutting into the abdomen, that it can be very painful or go wrong (with infection), and that it isn’t comparable to non-invasive options.
Certainly, having one's husband get a vasectomy is less risky and more effective than laproscopic tubal ligation, if the goal is preventing pregnancy.

The fact that you personally stopped for coffee on the way home is irrelevant to those things.

It sounds like you had a tough time with surgery. I'm sorry to hear that.
I was agreeing with you, all surgery has risk some more than others.
Yes tubal ligation has higher risk than vasectomy in most cases, but not if the man has health issues that make a vasectomy dangerous and the woman is healthy. Each person or couple need to weigh up their own risks and needs.
The OP suggested she wanted a hysterectomy, I suggested considering having tubal ligation, as a less invasive surgery. Just an option for them to consider.