Man flu but I’m pregnant?

[Badfish1]

DH and I both have a bad cold that we’ve caught from our toddler, of course DH is incapacitated with his. I’ve felt ill since Monday and each morning have got up early with our toddler whilst he’s stayed in bed for another half an hour. We both work full time so this has meant I’ve got DC ready for nursery etc.

The thing is I’m also 37 weeks pregnant. This morning I got up again early with toddler and then told DH I need to lay in tomorrow as I feel awful, it’s gone to my chest now and I have a fever. He says I’m being petty and argumentative and is asking why we ‘can’t just feel as bad as each other’. AIBU to think on this one occasion my needs are greater than his?

Your needs are 100% greater than his. Men are such wimps.

You both need to look after yourselves. Why are you going to work if you feel so rotten and it’s gone to your chest? It much help this weekend but I would have called in sick, taken the toddler to nursery and gone back to bed for the day to recover. People who struggle into work ill also spread it around the workforce! If you’re sick, stay at home.

Of course YANBU

Sounds like you've procreated (again) with a guy who doesnt give a shit whether you are healthy and feeling good or not, whilst carrying his child, its still your job to do everything with the toddler...

Good luck.

My God what a selfish arse. You’re 9 months pregnant but he has to lie in bed and you get on with it? And you’re petty? Wow. What a man.

He sounds awful. If you can both "feel as bad as each other", why has he not done his share of the getting up? Oh yes, it's because he's a selfish git...

I did stay at home as I wfh. I also took half a day sick earlier this week but still have to get up with the toddler to get them to nursery?

You’re seeing the real man now.

He’s a prick and you should down tools completely. If it’s gone to your chest and you’ve got a fever you should go to the doctor to be checked. Hope you feel better soon.

He didn’t seem to think both of you felt as bad as each other when he was having an extra half hour all week.

Actually you can be as poorly as each other but because you’re pregnant, the options for treatment (cold relief drugs) aren’t available for you as they are him.

how can he possibly think things are equal? And especially as you have got up every day this week and let him stay in bed.

seriously, go on strike, make him do his bit.

Wow. What an unbelievably massive arsehole. No way my DP would have done this to me when I was pregnant (or at all)

If you’re as unwell as each other, it still begs the question of why he can’t take his turn?

I hate him for you

Tell him you're both feeling rotten so it's his turn and as you're also pregnant he needs to pull his weight! Honestly, why are so many men so crap!!

I would just tell him, I feel ill, been up all week with toddler, 37 weeks pregnant, it’s his turn. I really hope he helps out this weekend, it shouldn’t be all on you.

Op please look after yourself. Your immune system is depressed because you are pregnant.
Pay attention to your temperature. And get in touch with GP the second it starts to rise.

DH is going to have to step up, rest as much as you can this weekend to give your body a chance to recover.

Tell him you both feel exactly as bad as each other despite you also being 37 weeks pregnant and less able to take drugs for it. And so you will be having a 2.5 hour lie in tomorrow to make up for the four half hours he's had this week. What a prick

Whether you WFH or not, you are still poorly, so should be off sick. You can take the time, when the toddler is in nursery to do some self-care, to sleep, have a warm drink, lie in the sofa etc.

As pp. “We can feel as bad as each other. Therefore as I have supported your illness all week by doing the things that can’t just not be done, you can now take a turn supporting mine by doing those things. Our toddler has TWO parents. Thanks.”

DHs response as usual is to shout ‘pregnancy is more important than anyone else, of course’. Trouble is him shouting that makes me think he doesn’t actually mean it.

Your husband is a selfish prick

Of course he doesn't mean it. He's being sarcastic and a total prick. Honestly, I would be furious.

Your immune system is depressed and your lungs are being compressed due to the pressure of the baby.

You are actually at much higher risk of complications e.g. pneumonia

Happened to me when pregnant with my second, I am lucky to be alive.

Tell him to get his head out of his arse and seek medical attention if your breathing is struggling.

Your DH is an Ahole! I’m a mum through adoption so never experienced pregnancy but even I know he’s being a total arse! Is he close to his mum? If so I’d be calling her and telling her what a spoilt brat she’s raised and see if she steps in to tell him what a total pr1ck he’s being. Even without the pregnancy in the equation why should he get to lay in and not pull his weight? Welcome to the world of parenting, it sucks because you literally can not call in sick to a toddler and he needs to man up and get on with it.

YANBU. I had a bad cold when I was about 39 to 40 weeks pregnant with DC2. I then had a chest infection (first ever). I don't know if it was connected but DC2 was born with pneumonia and spent a week in SCBU.