To refuse to pay this nursery charge

[Jeronnemo]

2 children in nursery. Been really happy there. A few niggles but nothing major. This month's bill had a £40 per child charge for an activity that they only do in winter. It usually kicks in in December through to April but this time they've charged it early. The issue is that they've not actually done the activity yet. I spoke to the manager about it and she was very abrasive and came out with some absolute nonsense about why it was on the bill. She lied and expected me to just suck it up. I'm livid but the conversation is over as far as she's concerned and if I push it any further, I risk being asked to leave. Do I just write it off for the sake of peace and my blood pressure?

You know those occasions when you wonder to yourself if you are the problem, OP my advice is to assume you are in fact the problem.

You paid for an activity that is taking place a bit later than you thought. But it is in fact taking place, therefore there has been no “money grab”. It’s happening, therefore you can’t take back the money, it’s happening.

The reason it makes no sense to people is because you have utterly over reacted and blithering on about lies and grabs. Absolute nonsense.

I have every sympathy with the nursery here, goodness only knows what way the conversation went. Accusing your child’s carers of lying isn’t a sensible option when the fact pattern is so demonstrably unclear.

Nope. It's a monthly charge. I will pay it in December and it WILL happen in December. It's November that's the issue.

I think the only way to get to the bottom of this is to wait until spring, then you count how often you’ve paid £40 and how often the activity was done.

But as others said (and you’ll come back now to say that I don’t get it), I’d assume they invoiced you on 1st November for the December activity (yes I get it that you pay your nursery fees in November for November, but that might not be the same as for activities that need prebooking).

What date did you pay the bill for November? Not what date in November did you pay the bill. What date did you pay the bill that covered Novembers fees?

What date did/will you be paying the bill for December?

I absolutely didn't accuse them of lying. I was thinking it but of course didn't say it. I'm more than capable of being diplomatic. I challenged it professionally and in a measured way but they just doubled down and continued with the lies.

I think when you have this many people asking for clarification you really have to accept it is you that hasn't explained it very well! Your posts aren't written with clarity.

Which isn't helped in the slightest by the crazy drip feeding of what the activity is. OP is making the explanation way more complicated that necessary due to the bizarre attempt to hide what the activity. is. Does she really think she's Kim Kardashian famous that someone will track her down to the nursery if she reveals that it's actually about a bunch of toddlers doing yoga or whatnot. She's posted enough identifiable details anyway that anyone going to the same nursery will immediately know what is it. Just say what it is FFS.

Then you should either get a credit at the end of the activity period or a refund.
What is the activity and why hasn’t it taken place yet?

Please see my answer to this above.

Fuck me, that's literally what I'm saying. That a refund should be given but they've refused.

Quite!

What drip feeding?

Sorry, I can't see you've given any dates at all and I think it's impossible to know what's going on until you do.
Edit found them!

But without knowing the reason for not having November money back, its hard to give opinions on reasonability

If it had gone:

Manager "yeah sorry, the ice-skating teacher broke her arm in November but we can't refund as we had already paid her and we are waiting for her to refund. But don't worry, she will do February for free so you will not pay anymore overall"
then yeah, thats fine

If it had gone:

Manager " We didn't do the planned art and crafts project in November, sorry we don't refund money paid even if activities don't go ahead, but we will do it in December so could you pay now please. "

Then you are right to question no refund

Basically you will pay 6 times for an activity that takes place 5 times. I wouldn't be happy either. Did the nursery say it had happened?

Found it now and I wouldn't be happy in your shoes.

They should refund you the 40 quid in November if the activity wasn’t done this month, unless it wasn’t done because your child was sick/missed the dates it occurred ( rather than it being the nursery’s fault )
the way you have replied to some posters here has been pretty rude and demeaning, I hope this isn’t how you communicate with the nursery manager!!!

It IS the same for the activity. If it wasn't, I wouldn't be here feeling aggrieved about it.

The point so many are making and that you are ignoring is have the nursery specifically said the November payment is for November. If the provider needs paying before starting the activity in December then of course they need the money in November to pay them.

Did you ask them if they would be charging you on monthly bills for the 5 months you will receive the activity, or will you be charged for 6 months but only get 5 months of the activity.

Maybe if you answer the questions people ask instead of just repeating yourself it will actually make some sense.

Did all the hard of understanding get up early this morning?

What has your nursery got to do with how the OP pays for her nursery?

It's perfectly obvious what the problem is and perfectly reasonable to question why she's being asked to pay for a November sessionn of something that didny happen in November

What was the excuse @Jeronnemo

OK, phew, thank you. You've just brought my blood pressure down a notch!

Have you considered it’s you, not us. Your post is confusing.

An (almost) lone voice of sanity in a sea of madness. Thank you.

If many people are misunderstanding a situation then the problem lies with the person explaining the situation.
Your explanations are all over the place. First you said the activity kicks in in December then you’ve said November, you said the activity hasn’t been done yet then you said it isn’t going to be done. No one knew what you were talking about so explain it better.