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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Concerned about DDs financial position

105 replies

Clinkanddink · 28/11/2025 03:40

Long story short without being too identifying ideally, my DD is in her late 20s, she earns an amount that most would class as a high earner, lives in a flat share, is paying a high amount into her pension (12%, employer matched), has a significant amount of savings in a low interest savings account (from inheriting her grandparents property as they decided to skip a generation for various reasons), she maxes out her stocks and shares ISA every year but this is the extent of her investments.

Today she came to me for advice. She told me was feeling a little worried as she isn’t doing much with the money she has her reasons were as follows
She is likely to buy in the next 5 years and need the money for a deposit (London living so while it would buy a family home outright in much of the country or a flat in many parts of London, it’s likely to be used as a deposit by her) so doesn’t want to invest incase it loses value and her research suggested any money needed in 5 years or less shouldn’t be invested as it’s not long enough for any market dips to recover.
She doesn’t want a buy to let as she feels it ties her down, and the new renter reforms scare her.
She doesn’t want to buy now and get a lodger as she likes the flexibility of renting and is undecided on if she will move abroad.

Basically she has a lot of money doing not a lot and every month that amount grows as she earns significantly more than she spends.

She seems extremely reluctant to change any of this and frankly I’ve never been in her situation so don’t know how to advise. She said “I feel like I have money right now, that I haven’t matured enough to use”.

Im now worried she is effectively losing money due to inflation and will realise when the time to buy does come she doesn’t have the spending power she hoped she would.

AIBU to be concerned by this? Does anyone have any advice?

OP posts:
abracadabra1980 · 28/11/2025 07:42

FunMustard · 28/11/2025 04:36

Tell her to speak to a financial advisor.

This. Mine is fantastic and gave me the option and confidence to semi retire in my 50's - on not a lot.

snowmichael · 28/11/2025 07:42

> “I feel like I have money right now, that I haven’t matured enough to use”.
That sounds pretty mature to me
Does her employer offer financial advice services to their staff?
Otherwise it's time to book an appointment with an IFA

abracadabra1980 · 28/11/2025 07:46

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Ffs this is a forum and the OP is entitled to ask for advice as anyone is. Some people have never been to a financial adviser in their lives. Take your self destructing bitterness elsewhere.

Ubertomusic · 28/11/2025 07:59

The crisis will only deepen. Gold will be up more.
Luxury will move to OAE, inevitably.

Concerned about DDs financial position
Dragonscaledaisy · 28/11/2025 08:06

Her employment situation seems very precarious so I would be more concerned about that than her finances. Feeling 'terrified' suggests she needs to be far more proactive in ensuring she's on a sustainable career path rather than waiting for extraneous factors to force her hand.

mcmuffin22 · 28/11/2025 08:07

Why doesn't she just buy a place to live in? Surely that's the best thing she can do with her money rather than sit and worry that it's not doing anything.

Titasaducksarse · 28/11/2025 08:09

Have a look at Rebel Finance School. You could do the course together. It's legit.

Bjorkdidit · 28/11/2025 08:11

mcmuffin22 · 28/11/2025 08:07

Why doesn't she just buy a place to live in? Surely that's the best thing she can do with her money rather than sit and worry that it's not doing anything.

Because she's not sure where she wants to live and even a small place in London will cost tens of thousands in fees and stamp duty and she's not guaranteed to be able to sell easily without losing money.

Also she'll be paying interest on a mortgage instead of currently earning money on savings/investments - of course there's also the cost of rent, but it's not a given that she's losing out by not owning now.

honeylulu · 28/11/2025 08:13

If she won't talk to a financial adviser because she's "done her own research" and yet still doesn't know what to do ... I'm not sure she's going to be receptive to anything posters on this thread might say.

Sassylovesbooks · 28/11/2025 08:17

Your daughter needs to speak to a financial advisor. Unless someone on MN is one, that you aren't necessarily going to get proper advise.

YourOliveBalonz · 28/11/2025 08:27

UncharteredWaters · 28/11/2025 04:45

Why do so many people think they are oh so funny by being an arse to a concerned parent?

Quite. People were most unhelpful when I asked for advice, deeply concerned that my adult DDs diamond shoes were too tight

PrimSec · 28/11/2025 08:29

We’ve been in her shoes. We didn’t want anything high risk, but didn’t want the capital eroded too much. We went with fixed term bonds (in our case, constantly renewing 1y ones to retain full flexibility).

A lot of advice about buying here doesn’t seem to understand that some people want/need to be more mobile. The last thing I’d do is buy property. No way you’d recoup all the fees and stamp duty if you wanted to move and sold in a few years.

mcmuffin22 · 28/11/2025 08:31

Bjorkdidit · 28/11/2025 08:11

Because she's not sure where she wants to live and even a small place in London will cost tens of thousands in fees and stamp duty and she's not guaranteed to be able to sell easily without losing money.

Also she'll be paying interest on a mortgage instead of currently earning money on savings/investments - of course there's also the cost of rent, but it's not a given that she's losing out by not owning now.

She is currently paralysed by a lot of what ifs. What if she fancies moving country? What if her industry goes under? All of these are questions that most people ask before taking the plunge and yet we still do it. Life is full of unknowns. In the meantime, the dd is pushing 30 and I would bet that in 5 years time her money will buy her less than it can currently buy her (and she's paying her landlord's mortgage). I would guess that 5 years of paying rent would cover her stamp duty anyhow.

LighthouseLED · 28/11/2025 08:31

Sassylovesbooks · 28/11/2025 08:17

Your daughter needs to speak to a financial advisor. Unless someone on MN is one, that you aren't necessarily going to get proper advise.

Edited

Even if someone on MN is a financial adviser they won’t be able to give actual advice online; possibly pointers about things to consider but that’s it.

If she doesn’t want to take financial advice then at least tell her to make sure she’s not saving more than the FSCS limit with any one institution

FastTurtle · 28/11/2025 08:31

My DS is in a similar position except his lump sum is from savings not an inheritance. He makes the most of Lisa’s and S&S Isa and also pays more into his pension while he can afford it.

PrimSec · 28/11/2025 08:31

Oh, and to add, I was the same as her about an IFA. If you know you’re not going to invest, not sure it’s worth paying the fees for advice if you’ve already done quite a bit of indépendant research.

Dweetfidilove · 28/11/2025 08:36

She sounds quite sensible are her plans are short term, and probably just needed some reassurance she's doing the right thing.
At this point, just tell her you're sure she knows what she's doing, having done her research, so she'll make the right choices for herself.
Not much else you can do.

W0tnow · 28/11/2025 08:38

Monty27 · 28/11/2025 03:48

Wasteful on so many levels. Poor girl. Needs a rude awakening in my book.

Wasteful how? She is saving money.

marynotquitecontrary · 28/11/2025 08:40

Jesus read the room.

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 28/11/2025 08:42

@HelenaWaiting Oh don't be ridiculous - different people have different problems, and this is a broad spectrum website.

Anyway OP your daughter needs to see 3 financial advisers who will give her various options, make sure they aren't tied to particular products. I don't think her problems have anything to do with her not being mature, she jusf needs some advice and from there she can educate herself.

If she doesn't then choose to take any advice and just wants to sit on it for 5 years, that's fine - she's v young and she's doing well already and has been lucky with inheritance - she'll be fine.

SJone0101 · 28/11/2025 08:43

Franjipanl8r · 28/11/2025 04:50

I’d be more concerned about her carbon footprint than her finances, how excessive.

ODFO

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 28/11/2025 08:43

marynotquitecontrary · 28/11/2025 08:40

Jesus read the room.

crackers

phantomofthepopera · 28/11/2025 08:44

If she doesn’t want to invest, she could at the very least move it from the low-interest savings account to one with higher interest rates. It will still be safe as houses but she could get an extra % or 2.

FuelledByRageAndHaribo · 28/11/2025 08:44

I’d do LISA, ISA, 50k in Premium Bonds.
Anything else I’d put in NSI fixed rate bonds.
Ok it won’t earn as much as anything riskier but the money would be safe as NSI is government backed so not subject to the £85k limit as other institutions are. With fixed rate bonds you can see exactly what you’re going to get at the end of the term.

Hanabanan · 28/11/2025 08:45

Is she actually asking for your advice?

it sounds like she is successfully adulting and letting you know her plans, and you are planning to stick your beak in.

I’d just let her get on with it tbh.