AIBU to ask you to help me lose weight?

[whereloveis]

Would really welcome advice and tips that aren't calorie counting and weighing portions. Don't want to take weight loss jabs.

I'm a vegetarian (eat eggs and dairy), 38 years old, 5ft4 and weight 12 stone 1lb.

Have just started couch to 5K and want to loose a good 3 stone. Is this doable? What sort of things should I be eating and how long do you think it would take me?

In short, you can't out exercise diet. So you do have to calorie count to some degree - that might be reducing the size of the portions you currently eat, changing what you eat for lower calorie options, or not eating snacks etc but you do have to reduce your intake. Even once you can run 5km it will only burn around 300 calories - which is the same as a posh yoghurt.

What do you eat currently? Do you eat ready meals or cook from scratch? Do you use jars of sauces? Do you eat a lot of carbs? White bread, white pasta, white rice, potatoes? Do you eat a lot of fruit?

Ask yourself how you have reached the weight you are. Myself, I eat crisps more than I should and if I didn't, I would weight less. What do you do that you could stop that is hindering your progress?

My best tip for you is to look into fasting. You might be a bit too young for it though, see what you think. But I started fasting every day by not eating breakfast anymore and allowing longer spaces of time between meals. That is what works for me right now.

At your age I was slim and fit tho, and I ate -
Porridge, yoghurt, fruit and nits all mixed up for breakfast before work.
An apple and slice of cheese at 11am.
Lunch, from last night's dinner.
Then a cooked dinner and I often ran 5k in the gym on the way home.

I was consistently 9.5stone at 5.5, which isn't thin but was OK and stable for me.

When I hit peri, I knocked off breakfast and the snack, and I have that same porridge for lunch now. Have to make sure I get enough protein tho. Protein as your food will lose weight for you.

Good luck!

Stuart small, aim to lose 7lbs first, keep it off then go again.

3 stones all at once is super hard and you will end up putting yourself off trying to do it one go

It takes longer than you think, start and keep going!

Look at your current diet and make simple changes. Are you always frying eggs in oil or butter? Try switching to scrambled. Do you drink a lot of fizzy drinks - try reducing to one a week. That sort of thing

Sadly I agree that although exercise is incredibly important and you should definitely do whatever exercise you enjoy and can manage... it's the food you eat that is dictating your weight.

I already ate fairly healthily but it was portion sizes for me... i was eating til i was too full and having too many little treats.

I never counted calories per se but did get to know what was worth it and what wasn't - some things might surprise you how calorific they are.

You need to understand why the weight has gone on how to loose ut. Its a simple reduce calories and increase movement. Eat less white carbohydrates and more veg fruit and wholemeal carbs.
Although you say you don't want to join SW or WW thrse organisations do help you to understand your intake and do motivate you to stick to healthy eating....

You have to cut down and eat in a deficit. 500 cals a day under what you burn (tdee) to lose a lb a week, 1000 under to lose 2.

there is no magic trick to it, you need to cut back, eat healthy foods, low fat, low sugar, I personally find lowering carbs helps, and lots of lean protein., limit alcohol, drink 3 litres of water a day, and ensure you eat 1g of protein for every kg of body weight so you lose fat and not muscle.

is it doable. It really depends on your will power. Exercise is really a tiny part of weight loss, it’s key as you want to maintain muscle and not be all saggy at the end, but it’s really about what you consume, food and drink, take a weeks cals and divide by seven.

at your weight and height with light exercise, you’re probably burning between 1700 and 1900 cals a day, so to lose a lb a week you need to aim for a very max of 1400. You don’t have to religiously count, but you do need to keep an eye on it.

These organisations have a huge failure rate, 95 percent for weight watchers, 97 for slimming world, it’s how they make their money, it is much better the op teaches her self health habits rather than undertakes a diet program where is almost guaranteed to regain the weight. It’s about 80 percent with other diet methods for regain.

What has been working for me recently is planning better what to eat and trying to be mindful. So during the week at work I’ll have protein rich, vegetable based things like a salad with cottage cheese , hard boiled eggs or make myself a sweet potato and lentil curry or something like that keeping the carbs to a small amount. Same at night when having carbs I’ll just make sure it’s not loads. I don’t weigh anything but just eat a bit more protein. I have chilli and a bit of rice or similar. The key being to think ahead about it and also resisting mindless snacking so have things there which are more healthy.

Thank you for all your comments. This is helpful.

So I eat a HIDEOUS amount of sugar. Just to give an example on Thursday night, I ate 12 cadbury mini rolls and a bar of Lindt milk chocolate. On Friday night, I ate 12 cadbury mini rolls and 2 mince pies with cream. On wednesday night, I ate a bar of Lindt milk chocolate and half a pack of ginger nut biscuits.

I think I eat a lot of pasta as well and not much fruit.

I did lost about 2 stone a few years ago where I cut out all takeaways, refined sugars and cooked from scratch - BUT I was eating meat then, and my meals were really healthy, lots of protein and veg.

Since I went back to eating sugar and also became vegetarian, i've really struggled. Today is my first day and I'm determined I'm not going to have any sugar or sweets. I know I can do that because I did it a few years ago for about 5 months and it was a staggering transformation.

I think I'm just struggling because without eating things like a nice steak and veg, or some grilled chicken I end up eating pasta and pizza and then just fall back onto the sugar.

Thank you - what sort of meals/things should I be eating if I am vegetarian? I feel clueless about how to up my protein. I do eat two eggs every day.

Exercise alone won't do it, sorry OP. It's a hard and boring truth but the only thing that really works in weight loss is eating fewer calories than you use.

I never wanted to be one of those women who knew the calorie count of the foods I ate, but after losing 35lbs this year just by keeping to a calorie deficit, I've had to admit that it does actually work!

You don't need to get obsessive about it, but you do need to be honest with yourself about what you're putting in your mouth.

Thursday night, I ate 12 cadbury mini rolls and a bar of Lindt milk chocolate. On Friday night, I ate 12 cadbury mini rolls and 2 mince pies with cream. On wednesday night, I ate a bar of Lindt milk chocolate and half a pack of ginger nut biscuits.

This sounds as though you may have a binge eating disorder and might need some professional help?

Oh. I think I'm just very greedy and grew up with poor eating habits.

Why are you against calorie counting? I find it the only reliable way to lose weight consistently. Because you can eat anything as long as you factor it in, you don't get cravings and the urge to binge as you do with diets that cut out particular food groups. You can combine it with general healthy eating/avoiding processed foods, but it isn't catastrophic if you have the odd UPF item as long as it's counted in.

If you're careful, you don't have to weigh/measure often - just weigh/measure once and remember how many calories are in half a mug of rice or an average sized jacket potato, apple, the amount of cheese you'd usually cut off the block etc. Anything pre-packed has the calories on the packaging. You don't need to count minimal calorie, healthy foods such as green veg.

Beans, lentils, quorn mince, cottage cheese.

OP with that amount of sugar you are risking diabetes in future, I don’t know how old you are. But I don’t think it’s psychologically healthy to say no sugar ever as I think this risks the binge cycle we can get into. Do you like dark chocolate? Maybe try having a square of it with a couple of Brazil nuts. Do you have to have all these sweet things in the house? If you are planning better you can have a small amount without binging.

OK, so 12 mini rolls alone is almost 1500 calories, which is more than my calorie intake for the entire day.

I don't say that to be a smug competitive under-eater btw. But that is where your problem lies. Couch to 5k will never sort that, I'm afraid!

You need to cut the sugar, drastically. I have one sugary treat per day (eg a single Twirl with a cup of tea in the evening) and work it into my calorie count for the day. Up your protein and green veg - I eat lots of eggs, cottage cheese etc, have a salad alongside every meal.

It is harder for veggies, though, I think.

Oh, and avoid SW/WW like the plague. Their business model is literally setting you up to fail.

I'm also vegetarian. You do need to do calorie counting to teach yourself what healthy food looks like. You will feel fuller if you eat high protein veg like beans. Stop eating sweets - switch to very dark 75%+ chocolate, have a small amount of honey on yoghurt.

Beans, yoghurt, eggs, cottage cheese, leafy veg are the best vegetarian diet food.

I agree
That's not greedy, it's disordered eating.

Did you have trauma growing up?
You need to fix the emotional side first

How often do you eat like that?

OP I also agree that you should consider this.

Diet and exercise won’t help, you need to deal with your trauma.
You have an eating disorder, you are not greedy.

several days a week. I'm surprised I'm not more overweight. To a PP, I did have trauma growing up - have had years of psychotherapy. I think I'm better now but probably very sad still, yes.

I don't have a whole load of joy in my life and so sweet treats are the joy in my day I suppose.

So I eat a HIDEOUS amount of sugar. Just to give an example on Thursday night, I ate 12 cadbury mini rolls and a bar of Lindt milk chocolate. On Friday night, I ate 12 cadbury mini rolls and 2 mince pies with cream. On wednesday night, I ate a bar of Lindt milk chocolate and half a pack of ginger nut biscuits.

Stop buying this stuff. If you haven't bought it, you can't eat it. Find some healthier or at least less damaging ways of satisfying a sweet craving. Natural yoghurt with a little honey, for instance, or even a small packet of sweetened popcorn is not terribly healthy but better than all that cake and chocolate.

What has been working for me recently is planning better

Agree with this...and food prep is key. BUT also plan for the days where everything goes to shit or you just can't be arsed. Because you won't be perfect and it WILL happen.

I keep a stock of ready meals in my freezer. Absolutely not ideal, definitely higher in salt and lower in nutrients than a home cooked meal would be. However, they're a 5 minute, no-effort meal that I know is 450 cals and 28g protein. And that's far better than the four pieces of white toast with butter that i'd otherwise eat on a 'today's gone to shit' day!