AIBU to ask you to help me lose weight?

[whereloveis]

Would really welcome advice and tips that aren't calorie counting and weighing portions. Don't want to take weight loss jabs.

I'm a vegetarian (eat eggs and dairy), 38 years old, 5ft4 and weight 12 stone 1lb.

Have just started couch to 5K and want to loose a good 3 stone. Is this doable? What sort of things should I be eating and how long do you think it would take me?

I'm vegetarian too and have dropped from size 18 to a 10 without jabs etc. I started off going to the gym 3 x a week. Running on treadmill for 30 mins then weights for 15 mins. Intermittent fasting Monday to Friday. Lunch is 3 boiled eggs and salad ( no carbs) , eat as much vegetable salad as you like. Then normal dinner with the rest of the family. In the morning, just green tea with lemon till 12 noin when you break your fast. If at some point during the day and you are feeling nibbly, just eat 1 or 2 boiled eggs.

Now that ive achieved a healthy bmi, I go to the gym 2 x a week. Treadmill for 15 mins then weights for 10 mins. I still practice Intermittent fasting weekdays etc. Weekends I have a glass of wine Friday night and a glass on Saturday night. I eat a low calorie shop bought muffin with tea Saturday and again Sunday. Rest of the time I eat sensibly. I gained 2kg during summer due to over indulging but ive since lost it. I weigh myself every 2 - 3 days x

Not sure why everyone keeps saying, not exercise alone, when you clearly asked about food.

Like you I have never been great with weighing things and counting calories.

When I was your age, I did the gym only for 3 times a week for an hour BUT the key was following a low GI diet. It's all about sugar and metabolism. Honestly though YOU need to read about it, or listen to a book. It will explain it all to you and how/why it works. In summary, what I changed was all white food ie rice, pasta, bread, flour was replaced with it's brown equivalent. Instantly I was satisfied more easily, as I started everyone morning with porridge, seeds and cranberries. Then "measure" protein using the size of the palm of your hand. Everyone is a different size so it makes no sense that a woman 5.6 eats the same as little me at 5.2. Batch cooking curries helped me, as I tend to feel more satisfied when I eat spiced food. Chickpeas based curries nay help you, then add different combos of eggs/spinach/chestnut mushrooms etc. That's only an example. Then for snacks, popcorn, seeds are all ok.

After 2 kids I have just started it again, but now need to make it all family friendly. I really am short on time, so have been using AI to help me meal plan. I can only do it as I have read up the rules etc, I wouldn't let AI blindly stroll me the wrong way (I argue with AI and do win). It's a massive help. I currently have a 3 week meal plan, with one weekly shopping list, that is tweaked slightly each week. Try it, it's not going to hurt and is definitely a healthy, nutritious alternative to crash diets.

When I diet, I put away £10 for every 1lb I loose, then had money for new clothes, you'll need them!

Two things that helped me lose weight were calorie counting and cutting out alcohol. I know calorie counting is boring but when you start seeing results you actually end up enjoying it (I did anyway!). I cut back to 1200 calories a day 5 days a week, which was challenging but if you eat a lot of protein you feel fuller and I didn’t drink during the week. I also ate dinner at 6 and had nothing else till the next morning. At the weekend I let myself eat and drink whatever I liked. It worked for me because I could look forward to having whatever I wanted at the weekend. I exercised 3 times a week, mainly strength training as building muscle helps you burn more calories and cardio really only makes a very minor difference to weight loss. I went from 13st (5’7”) to 10st in about 8 months

5'4" and 12 stone is surely a healthy weight?

I am about your height, vegetarian and had a few stone to loose which I did achieve by meal prepping. Whilst you are counting calorie counting to batch cook, you don't then need to weight portions daily. I made things like large veg lasagnas, new potatos and veg (to add to store brought vegetable burgers/bakes), vegetable fajitas and home made pizzas - all freezable. I then divided into portions so I knew roughly how many calories each portion was. I used porridge sachets for breakfast, or had yoghurt and fruit so everything is preportioned out and planned a weeks menu at a time. It really stopped me picking as I had my food for the day ready to go. Good luck

I would recommend starting weight training. You will build more muscle which burns more calories.

I'd say go very low carb. But obviously that's a lot more easy for meat eaters.

Or try going GF? I cut out wheat (so could still have some other grains with gluten) and lost weight really easily. But then again I strongly dislike GF bread, cakes etc so just ended up no wheat and hardly any carbs.

My main carb was always bread. I also like potatoes but you can't have them for three meals!

I'm 38 with two young children. I have struggled with my weight for most of my adult life. I have managed to lose a significant amount of weight at times for specific purposes (wedding, trying to get healthier before pregnancy) but have always ended up piling it back on through comfort eating and being too sedentary.

In April this year I decided to try and make a permanent change. I realised I was picking clothes based on hiding fat rather than any sense of style, and that I was avoiding being in photos with my kids because I hated how I looked. I'm not sure what my weight was, because I couldn't bear to weigh myself until I'd been dieting for three weeks. When I finally bit the bullet I was 11st 6 (I am 5ft 1). I have now got down to 9st 9 and would ideally like to be 8st 7. However I'm now plateauing so will likely have to make some adjustments if I'm going to shift more.

What has been working for me is:

• Cutting back on carbs generally
• Eating a set breakfast of a single slice of seedy bread/toast with one egg and a piece of fruit or some cooked veg (e.g. mushrooms, tomatoes, courgette)
• Set lunch of two Ryvita crispbreads with low fat cream cheese or peanut butter, then four dessert spoons of full fat Greek yoghurt with grapes and melon
• I don't currently count calories at dinner time but I have drastically cut my portion, since my portions have always been huge, and upped the proportion of vegetables. I am not vegetarian but I now eat more white meat and fish than red meat.
• I am an all or nothing person when it comes to sugar and snacks. I don't find a couple of mouthfuls of chocolate satisfying. I would rather have none at all. I have therefore cut out all chocolate, biscuits, cakes, crisps and alcohol. This has been by far the hardest aspect of my diet, especially when the weekend comes around!
• Fruit or veg are the only snacks I allow myself, and I also fill myself with cups of tea and coffee. could definitely do with drinking more water but I'm afraid it just does not appeal.
• There have been many times when I've wanted to cave and gorge myself on chocolate, especially after dinner. I find that brushing my teeth is an effective way to draw a line under the day's eating!
• Diet, rather than exercise, has been the key to my weight loss to date. However, as I am not willing to reduce my intake further in order to shift another stone, I am going to focus now on doing more exercise and toning up. Now that I've shed a lot of the flab, I'm actually quite excited at the thought of getting fitter and stronger.

I've realised that, sadly, someone my height needs far fewer calories than I have been used to putting in. If and when I get to my target weight, I will likely need to stick to a similar regime to the one I'm on currently, but allow myself the odd slice of cake or glass of wine. It's going to have to be a whole mindset change though and that will be hard. I am someone who really enjoys indulging in excess, and though my diet has changed, those impulses and cravings haven't gone away, which is disappointing. However, I do feel younger, way less lethargic, and more feminine. I don't want to go back to the old me and I really hope I can make it stick this time. I wish you all the best with your own weight loss journey. It is bloody hard but it will be worth it.

I would say you are half way there being vegetarian . How about swopping dairy ( i.e.cows milk) for oat or soya if you have it on cereals ? Though being veggie myself for tbe last 35 years I still prefer cows milk in tea or coffee . I think it really is about the small changes, it won't be overnight but you have the right attitude to start with so good luck !

Have you tried tempeh, it is fermented tofu, and in my opinion so much nicer. It is also much better for your microbiome and really high in protein. Just steam it for 8 minutes before adding to a stir fry. It has a slightly nutty taste and absorbs flavour really well, I fry it with soy sauce, seseme seeds, garlic and ginger before adding veg.

There is no getting round "counting calories" if that's what you want to call it. Because the only way to lose is to be in calorie deficit and to do that you have to be aware of how many calories your are consuming and look to reduce it, either by selecting very low calorie food which you can eat a lot of or by general portion control.

Sadly,you will most likely feel hungry when doing this, which is why lots of people fail and its also where the jabs are so useful. Its much easier to stick to a calorie deficit when you aren't permanently hungry.
If you don't want jabs its down to will power. Too small words which are very difficult to achieve. You can try to offset hunger by upping the protein which helps, by minimising carbs and sugar which ultimately make you feel hungrier and by eating bulky fibrous things which mechanically fill your stomach.

The exercise is good for your health and wellbeing. But the average person cannot exercise away too many ingested calories. You would need to jog from morning to night. The jogging is a bonus towards calorie deficit so you should not "re eat" your exercise calories.
For keeping tabs, Nutracheck is a brilliant app. You pay but its well worth it.
And I would say, reconsider jabs if you can afford it, they are life changing.

OP, you describe serious bingeing behaviour and issues with sadness. The problem with disordered bingeing is that restriction worsens it, immensely so, and therefore all the advice you're getting on this thread is well-meaning people lobbing bombs into your life.

You sound like you're in the classic yoyo cycle - restriction has worked for you in the past when you lost weight and you think all you need to do is get back to that mindset again. But every time you go round this cycle, it gets harder and it makes the bingeing worse.

You write longingly about meat - steak and grilled chicken - which implies you miss those foods. You don't say why you became vegetarian, but it suggests you have been living in a constant state of restriction and feeling deprived of the food you want. This will trigger binges.

Fasting, low-carbing and calorie counting will trigger binges in someone with disordered eating as you describe. They are disastrous in building the tension, the feeling of deprivation, the high at denying yourself that inevitably crashes in ever decreasing cycles of time. The harder you restrict, the worse you binge, the more you hate yourself, the more you binge, the harder you try to restrict and the more you binge.

My suggestion from experience would be to stop being vegetarian - yes, of course it is possible to be a healthy veggie but not if you have binge eating disorder that is not under control. It would be to listen to podcasts that explore binge eating (Christy Harrison is good) and to seek help if you can though I understand that getting help especially for BED is hard and can be expensive. Stay well away from fasting, low carb and exclusion diets or low-calorie diets. Work to heal your relationship with food and the reasons why you self medicate with food. Stop blaming and punishing yourself.

It is hard, really really hard, and I will be honest. I only broke the cycle of bingeing and restricting by going on Mounjaro and using the space and mental peace it gave me to seek help and do the work required. I don't intend to come off Mounjaro any time soon, or maybe ever. It might take years of work to free myself from disordered eating and I have accepted that I need medication to help me to manage this condition - like I might need antidepressants or some other meds to manage another condition. The injections give me freedom from bingeing, an ability to eat intuitively and well, and the space that gives me enables me to properly engage with therapy and exercise in a way I simply could not while in the throes of bingeing.

I do think that all the advice you're receiving on how to restrict and deprive more intensely will make your problems worse, and I hope you find a way through as you deserve peace and health and good nourishment.

I could have written your post! I used to stop at the petrol station on the way to work buy a Swiss and eat the whole thing like a burrito, hide the packaging and then get another on the way back. Emotional eating, disordered eating, obsessed with food - constantly thinking about it.

I've lost a lot of weight over the last year and a half, and am now just two kilos from a healthy BMI. I did use a calorie-counting app, but mainly to up my protein intake and I can eat so much more balanced with the right amount of protein. I don't get ravenously hungry anymore. I had a pack of mince pies in the house a couple of weeks ago and had one or none per day - totally unheard of for me (see username!).

I had previously lost a lot with intermittent fasting but it triggered more boom or bust mindset/bingeing on my part, so just be aware of that. I know it's brilliant for lots of people.

I am pescetarian, although I only eat fish out or if DH cooks it, and although it is harder than when you don't eat meat, but I try to start with a decent amount of protein at breakfast which sets me up right. Small additions/swaps can really help - chia seeds, Greek yoghurt, Skyr, cottage cheese, nut butters, nutritional yeast, seeds and grains, gram flour, half quinoa/half rice instead of just rice. A few extra grams here and there of protein can add up.

Are you hitting your daily protein target? The body will keep you grazing until you have enough protein. I add no fat cottage cheese to scrambled eggs every day - excellent source of protein.

Do you get enough healthy fats ? Like avocado and extra virgin olive oil.

Chocolate is pretty easy to cut - I have porridge oats with raw cacao powder which gives me the chocolate hit minus the sugar. I have that literally every day.

I think you really need to look at the composition of what you eat if you want it to be sustainable. Whenever I've gone uncontrolled with diet its when I don't eat enough protein.

I also recommend more lentils and beans as they keep you fuller and have protein. You can introduce them gradually.

And work out what your TDEE based on a balanced diet looks like in terms of amount of food I.e. 30% healthy fat, 40% carb, 30% protein. Then just lower it to 300-700 calories below the TDEE for up to 12 weeks. Then reverse back up to TDEE for 2-4 weeks, and do another 6-12 weeks if still have more to lose.

I know you mean well but I'm just not sure this is true for me or that you understand how I eat.

I don't go through a cycle of bingeing and restricting. I once went through a period of several months four years ago where I ate very well and very healthily and cut out all UPFs and refined sugar. It was easy as it was lockdown, no one was going out or meeting up and I was able to do it.

Generally speaking since then, I haven't really got back into that mindset but certainly I wouldn't say I have been in a constant cycle of bingeing and restricting. I do overeat and love sugar and use it to self soothe - I think what would classically be called comfort eating.

I understand that weight loss jabs work and are great for some people - but I really don't think it is healthy to push them onto people. I really haven't said enough on here about myself for anyone to be recommending them to me and I know that I do not want to take them. I do not believe a healthy lifestyle of diet is out of reach for me unless I take them. I believe in myself and I do know I can do this without them.

I should also take a moment to say to everyone telling me you can't out exercise a bad diet that I absolutely know that and haven't asked for advice on exercise. I used to run a bit (not very well) and would like to get back into it because it won't harm my weight loss efforts but more because I would like to feel healthier.

Thank you to everyone who has posted and I hope you don't think I'm making a dig at those of you who've offered advice.

Like I said in a previous post, you have the right positive mindset to be able to do this .👍

Absolutely! Please keep us posted about your progress. I'm sure it'll be inspirational and a motivation for others x

I agree with you. I was envious of a neighbour's rapid weight loss until I learned that she'd achieved it through Mounjaro jabs and is now in excruciating pain from gallstones and needs to have her gallbladder removed. She has no regrets but personally I prefer the slow and steady approach of reducing portions, cutting out the crap and overall trying to get into a positive, healthy mindset. I need to change my whole self image and the relationship I have with food. I really don't think jabs are the answer to that (not that I could afford them even if I wanted to!)

No. BMI of 28.8 is on the high side of overweight. Obesity is at 30. NHS figures.

Damn, i'm 5'3" and 11 stone. I should pobably lay off the junk.

Most folks on the meds lose between 1-2lbs a week, rapid weight loss is not advised, so more fool her, but weight gain can cause gallstones, or rapid weight loss, but the fact this woman did it unhealthy is not related to the drugs, it is about her choices, she made herself unwell.

I think you need to cut the carbs down to 100g a day mostly from vegetables, pulses and moderate amounts of whole grains (like 1 portion a day).

Aim for 100g protein a day - eggs, low fat natural cottage cheese and yogurt, pulses, tofu, seitan.

No, it’s almost obese.

look up Dr Mindy Pelz to understand the benefits of intermittent fasting ( very good for hormone regulation and keeping your insulin stable so you don't get the sugar cravings and crashes). Aim for 30g protein per meal ..... eggs are about 6-8g protein each. Greek yogurt and cottage cheese are excellent veggie sources ( and the 0% fat ones actually have more protein than the higher fat ones ones). Add in seeds to your yogurt too which will boost the protein intake a little as well. Even a slice of a quality sourdough like Jason's will have protein in it. I am a sugar addict too but since upping my protein significantly ( and I do intermittent fasting so only have 2 meals a day) I've not craved chocolate at all. I maybe have it once a week whereas before would be 200g a day 😳 This way by focussing on the numbers for protein you shouldn't have to think about calories as in theory you will be eating more healthily and be full up more quickly and for much longer. Good luck!