To not want to be naked in sauna

[lollypoppy123]

I’m going to a fancy hotel in Germany with an amazing spa but I’ve just found out the spa is textile free which means no clothes whatsoever allowed. I’m really uncomfortable with this as I’ve had a mastectomy and my reconstruction is pretty ugly. Even without that, I’d feel weird being naked with strangers.

German sauna culture is something really liberating. The saunas tend to be much higher quality than what we are used to in the uk.
Id recommend checking the Aufguss plan for the day you are there and work your way up in temperature in 1 hour intervals. Take off jewelry. Get the robe rental. You will also need pool shoes because most will not allow you to walk around bare foot outside of the Sauna area.
Swimsuits are full of chlorine. Nobody wants to breathe in chlorine. Please don’t try to sneak in a swimsuit. It really will be frowned on by others and knowing germans someone will definitely call you out on it which is much more embarassing than being naked.
People truly do not care about that and they genuinely won’t look.
During the Aufguss it is Like a ceremony which is led by a member of staff, sometimes playing music, sometimes they do a Dance or read a poem etc. People will either be looking at him/her or relaxing with their eyes closed or in the hotter saunas just trying to last as long as possible.
Warning - they can get very very hot.

I know it's a completely different thing OP, but hopefully might help!
I had a double mastectomy, lots of scarring, and was persuaded to do a skinny dip, along with 1000+ other nutters for charity.
I was nearly in tears the night before, convinced I'd made the worst mistake, but at dawn the next day, I stripped naked and ran into the sea.
It was simply liberating.
From that moment on, I stopped fretting about being 'seen' when changing etc
I've done a few since, and can honestly say I never see the bodies, only the faces - that's where you look when people are dressed, and that's where you look when they're naked 🙂
Go for it - you won't regret it, and let's be honest, you're never going to see these people again!

I understand where you're coming from, but given a choice between "comfortable" and "uncomfortable" in life surely "comfortable" is better?

Obviously you'd choose "clothed" over "naked" anyway, which makes this hypothetical.

Where did I say I was shocked?

Likewise.

Indeed. A poor imagination or a charmed life?!

I'm sure you will be allowed to wrap a towel around yourself OP, but you could email the spa to double check to reassure yourself. You might find the naked atmosphere helps you feel better about your body though, when you see that no one has a perfect body.

Hope you have a lovely time in any case.

I agree. Most PPs I am sure are trying to be helpful saying that everybody has their own hang-ups about their bodies, and you see lots of bodies in the sauna which are not perfect, and it's ok. But I resent the implication that if you don't like the idea of naked saunas then it must mean that you are a prude and insecure about your body. I am very secure about the way I look, without any false modesty my body is great, slim and toned and I am not embarrased by it at all. But I still like privacy for my private parts and don't want to be naked around strangers.

Thank you - that does make a certain amount of sense, although I suspect you could construct a similarly sensible justification for the wearing of clothes. I feel like there is a specific German cultural thing around naturism (not necessarily in the sense of nudity) - a common set of beliefs around the exaltation of ‘nature’. I was really struck by someone else’s explanation about how it’s healthful to sweat unimpeded by synthetic materials. I’m not sure how much science there is to support that! (Although I’m happy to be corrected.) It all probably relates to how well the Green Party does in Germany?

I like Germans and Germany - have had many happy holidays there and I always feel very comfortable. And I’m not saying English/British culture is any more rational. (Beliefs about dirt/hygiene/nature are quite class-coded in the UK I think). It’s just interesting when these cultural differences burst into the open. And how febrile we all get when talking about body dirt!

May I ask those from 'naked' countries, why is swimwear considered unhygienic? Is it because in a sauna you sweat in it? 🤔

I voted YANBU because you feel how you feel and that's not unreasonable. However, I think you need to decide whether you want to give it a go, giving yourself permission to leave if it feels too much. For what it's worth, while I'm all likelihood no one will be looking at you, I'm sure you are beautiful just as you are and the scars and wrinkles and lumps and bumps that tell our life stories have a beauty all of their own. I hope you have a lovely trip, whatever you decide.

I refuse to believe that if an attractive woman in her 20s was naked in a sauna that the men present wouldn’t be perving at her.

I think you do have to check whether it is just the sauna or the whole spa. One of my friends went to one in Austria and the whole thing was naked and mixed sex. She said the first 30 minutes were horrific in terms of self consciousness and she was trying to stay under the water so she wasn’t as visible then she sort of got used to it. It’s always put me off a German spa break to be honest as that would be my ideal of hell swimming around with a bunch of naked people.

I'm now wondering if you went to the same school as me, we had a PE teacher who seemed unhealthily invested in making us go through the showers sans towels!

It would be worse to be naked in front of a bunch of people you know.

Maybe they'd be happy she was there but ANY behaviour that showed it (staring, flirting, following, touching, becoming visibly aroused) would lead to the man being kicked out and banned. It just doesn't go on. People know how to behave themselves.

I've gone in my 30s - fat, post mastectomy with a bald head, and in my 20s - big boobs, long blonde hair and a fairly slim waist and I have always felt completely safe. There is no lechy behaviour and if there was, I would feel 100%, confident in telling security and having them escorted out.

I've done textile-free saunas in Austrian hotels. I pick a quiet time, as far as possible. You can wrap your towel round you till you are lying down and there are also little hammam towels you can take in to drape around you. Sometimes it is pretty dark, or lots of steam, or there are semi enclosed booths, or even stay in your towel or lay an extra one on top of you. Plenty of people were doing those things.

And yes I agree nearly everyone isn't looking and there is a taboo on doing so. But that doesn't mean absolutely everyone will comply and I would prefer a swimsuit too - but after my initial reluctance...I loved the spas!

This is just how it is in Germany. It’s a cultural thing - not just in spas, but in homes too. If it’s any comfort, it means people are very used to bodies in all their variety. IMO it’s also much nicer to swim, sauna etc without heavy, wet material clinging to you! Maybe give it a go, OP.

I wouldn't be happy doing it. I've not had a mastectomy or anything like that. I would know I would probably not be the oldest, fattest, wrinkliest, most timeworn woman in there but I still would feel so uncomfortable, so , no, you are not BU..
It's cultural, Germans are conditioned to feel comfortable with nakedness, we are not..If you were so conditioned the mastectomy scars etc probably wouldn't bother you..there's no reason why they should but you can't help how you feel

This was in Hampshire.....?

Actually, the overwhelming majority of women are attractive to men.

I think the difference is if I take a shower and wash my body, it is clean. If I took a shower wearing clothes, those clothes would not be cleaned and neither would my body. So if someone showers in clothing and then enters the sauna, they are bringing more bacteria and germs in.

It is in Germany!

Not sure your user name is apt…

Nobody will pay any attention op, I know you won’t believe me as I was skeptical but it was so freeing. You are allowed towels usually, they provide 100% cotton ones

It’s not unreasonable that you don’t feel comfortable, but this is standard in German spas and they’re unlikely to bend the rules for you.

Bear in mind that in situations where everyone of every age is naked, people are used to seeing every imaginable body type, scars and all. You’re unlikely to attract attention, honestly.