To not want to be naked in sauna

[lollypoppy123]

I’m going to a fancy hotel in Germany with an amazing spa but I’ve just found out the spa is textile free which means no clothes whatsoever allowed. I’m really uncomfortable with this as I’ve had a mastectomy and my reconstruction is pretty ugly. Even without that, I’d feel weird being naked with strangers.

I think in reality, if it is a fancy hotel then it's not going to be crowded like a public sauna and chances are you will likely have it to yourself for some of the time.

You can walk around with your robe/towel round you and peer into the different rooms and choose an empty or women-only one. You can sit on your towel and if someone comes in and you are uncomfortable, you can just adjust it around you, or just leave for another room. You can't stay long in these things anyway. Oftentimes the rooms are so steamy you can't see anything anyway!

There will be little seated areas out of the rooms with likely nice juices and apples etc to eat, and people will be in robes there, not letting it all hang out, so the whole experience will still be lovely I'm sure.

Most do, usually to cater for religious groups or teenagers;)

Nope. Oh crikey, sounds like there's two of them!

Yes, I think the issue in a couple of posts is around the judgement and objectification of bodies. One thing these cultures get right is the normalisation of non-sexual nudity and of all body types. The idea that someone’s body could be ‘revolting’ is quite British in that it’s simultaneously tied to prudish ideas about the need for people with those bodies to cover up and, presumably, at the other end of the spectrum the acceptable exposure of ‘beautiful’ bodies. This suggests that the primary function of nudity is at the very least objectification and possibly sexualisation, and that those not meeting those criteria should hide their bodies.

Someone else upthread implied something similar. They weren’t comfortable with communal nudity themselves (not an issue; I understand that there are various reasons for feeling that way, especially where there’s been experience of sexual violence, and it’s definitely made more difficult being raised British!) but qualified this by saying that they did have a good body which they were confident in. To me, whether or not you have a so-called ‘good’ body (slim, toned) in this context is irrelevant, because all bodies in the spa are good for going to the spa. It’s hard, but it would help us all if many of us could be more accepting of our bodies and the possibility of imperfection, which comes to everyone at some point. It also makes me think of those whose bodies are not ‘good’ for going to the spa- those with illnesses or disabilities that mean they cannot go. If we have our health, we should be very grateful for that. I really hope that typically British attitudes to this can shift in time.

absolutely this

It's only on MN that some posters are convinced that all men must be perv and staring at women. In real life, it's not true and in countries like Germany it's just not happening. It makes no difference if there are men and/ or women, it's just not the vibe some people try to think it is

Yeah true. I don't like mixed saunas in general but I would prefer it if was with strangers than with people I know. I refused to be naked when I had a mixed sauna at work because it was all people I knew and worked with - I didn't want them to see me naked, and I'd rather not have seen them, but with strangers you're never going to see them again so it doesn't matter so much. (different if its single sex, I'm perfectly fine being naked with other women whether I know them or not)

Towards people who want to tell other people what to think about where to show their own bodies and where not to, you mean? (Which I haven't been doing, btw, my only beef is people who don't want to see/take part in nudity being labelled prudes.)

Not hostile. Irritated by the arrogance. HTH.

Swimwear will have chlorine soaked into it, which then evaporates into the air in the heat of the sauna which is unhealthy to breathe in and especially a problem for asthmatics. Its also never going to be as clean as a person who has just been in the shower and washed thoroughly, who then sits on a clean bum towel.

Communal changing room is totally different to being totally naked in every part of a spa.
Most gyms even in the UK have communal changing rooms, but you can stand in a corner and dress discreetly under a towel.

There are few, if any, spas in Germany that would require you to be totally naked at all times. Fancy ones like Vabaldi give you a towelling robe, and at minimum you'll have a towel you can wrap around yourself, and most people do when going in between saunas and treatments.

But they'd be naked in those rooms, whereas when you change in a communal changing room you don't have to be naked at all. You dress the top and bottom half of your body separately and half cover yourself.

😮 The perils of a private education!

This was the local comprehensive. Early 80s. Maybe they don't do hockey at comps these days.

It never caught on - we didn't even have a hockey team.

Yes, though you can still put a towel on your lap/between your legs/around your chest if you really want to. And the steam rooms are so steamy you can't really see anything.

I'm not claiming that you're going to be able to totally avoid nudity or seeing naked people, but your statement that spas require you to be totally naked at all times is false.

You won't have to be naked. Just don't wear a swimsuit as that is considered unhygienic - wrap yourself in a towel (naked underneath) and place another towel where your feet are so they don't touch the timber. That is acceptable in Germany.

What bothers me most about this thread is those who seem to feel that somehow the British view is the morally superior one and these foreigners are basically wrong to do what they do.

Of course no-one needs to go to a spa and be naked, they can choose not to go. And if you are not used to it it takes a bit of getting used to. Just like watching Americans using cutlery always makes me twitch. But it doesn't mean their way is wrong and ours is right.

I don't think I said 'at all times', but I was mainly pointing out that communal changing rooms don't require you to be naked in front of other people at all and they're not in any way comparable!

German’s won’t let you wear a swimming costume or clothes in the sauna as they think it’s unsanitary - but there should be loads of towels and no problem wrapping yourself in those

My comprehensive also had hockey lessons in the 90s. It wasn't considered odd. I don't think we had a team though.

Apologies. I was picturing a St Trinians type school. My bad. I never “ got” hockey. I only came to England at 15 having grown up in North Africa and thought it was barbaric, running around in miniskirts in the snow, I was convinced I’d get kneecapped by one of those sticks. Didnt have to out up with the games mistress pleasuring herself though.

As someone who regularly stays in 'fancy spa hotels' in Germany and Austria. It is different to the large scale public spas somr posters are talking about:

Usually, the adults only 'spaworld' is textile free. This means no swimming costumes in the facilities. Most people use a robe to lounge about in and to go between saunas etc. In the sauna itself, you need to sit on a towel. I have also often seen people with an artfully draped towel in the lap or across the chest. But it is 100% no swimming costume, so nude under the towel with no exceptions.

If you are not comfortable with this there are some other options:

1. There is often a 'family sauna'. This is usually basic, and allows children so less relaxing. But, it does require a swimsuit.

1. Do not go to the aufguss sessions where someone wafts a towel around with different scents and music. These are usually very busy sessions.

1. Go first thing in the morning or early evening when most of the Germans are off to get their included 5 course dinner. Often, the spa area is quite empty then and you can get a sauna to yourself.

1. Upgrade your room. Usually some of the higher end rooms include your own sauna.

I really hope you enjoy yourself anyway. The food and other facilities are usually excellent, and maybe by the end of your stay you will feel more comfortable to use the spa. You can spend time in the textile free relaxation areas wrapped up in your robe and see how everyone is just going about their business. It might help you relax about it.

For other posters- there is no issue that you don't want to be naked in a sauna/find it revolting/think its weird that others think its weird you have a problem with it...but you probably wouldn't book yourself in to a German naked spa hotel.

Nobody is telling anyone what do with their bodies though.

You've missed this part

"but it is just as acceptable to prefer people to cover up."

The PP wants that because she is offended by other people's nudity, not because she wants her privacy.

Who's shaming who?

Two optionsv either don't go, or sit with the towel wrapped round you (this is fine! ). It's really unhygenic to go in a swimsuit and you'll upset everyone else. It makes it really uncomfortable because whilst it's you feeling awkward, it feels like judgement on everyone else.

I’ve unexpectedly ended up in naked spas abroad OP, be assured no one is really looking at each other. There will be all sorts of bodies there of different shapes and sizes and many with scars! Having several scars from major ops myself and a history of disordered eating, I actually found the whole thing rather liberating tbh.

But also OP, remember that scars are just symbols of what you’ve overcome - you should be proud of them. I was very upset when at 18 I got my first set of scars (including one all the way down my back), but one of my friends told me this and called them my “stars” and it really did make me feel much better!