Flying as an unaccompanied minor at age 7

[CrispyClo]

I’m posting on behalf of my sister as she is looking for some external views on the matter.

My niece is 7, birthday was in August. She started a new school in September, which closes for Christmas a week earlier than most state schools. There don’t seem to be a lot of options for childcare during that week as not many schools here close that early so there aren’t any holiday camps.
My sister has booked my niece onto a week long camp abroad for the week. The camp is well reviewed and offers a pick up service for children flying as an unaccompanied minor. My sister initially felt this was a good idea, and booked it.
Now she is having some concerns and is unsure it’s the right choice, mainly as she appreciates 7 is quite young and while the flight isn’t particularly long, they don’t actually have someone sat with them, just cabin crew checking in. She has admitted herself she was fine with it until other people seemed to think it was a reckless parenting choice. I think it will be fine, my sister and I flew as unaccompanied minors often as our dad lived abroad, we were a bit older (maybe 10 the first time) but managed it fine.

AIBU to think my niece will be fine? She’s looking forward to the camp and doesn’t seem phased by the thought of it.

I think there are 2 aspects, 1 the flight - she is v young if there is turbulence / delays / diversions etc. But airlines are set up for this and that’s why you pay a premium. 2, the camp. Why does she need to be abroad for a week at 7? Is it a ski camp? It seems a long way for a 7 year old to be totally on her own. At 11 maybe, but to travel so far for a week at 7 seems a little too much.

Is there nothing uk based this time of year - pgl etc?

personally, ,if I was her, I’d hire a nanny for the week and get her to take her somewhere fun each day instead, mix of ice skating / theatre / Xmas baking at home / winter walks etc etc - the week will fly by, and she’ll have fun without the stress.

Can you genuinely not see the difference between young children walking between home and school each day, and a 7yo being sent overseas to complete strangers for a week?

The idea that I’d put the responsibility of caring for my 7 year old’s safety/wellbeing to a group of complete strangers, and in a different country, well that thought wouldn’t even cross my mind.

I did it at 6 and 7. Absolutely loved it. Got tons of attention from the flight crew. My dad always bought be my favourite comic which was something I always looking forward to. I was never alone and never felt scared.

Safeguarding your own small child is your main role as a parent; how could anyone think this is okay - it’s neglect.

How did you feel when you were transferred to the camp where you knew no-one?

And I bet most of them are being met by a familiar person at the other end.

There are many ways of encouraging independence without that. Do you think everyone who didn’t travel as a UM had trouble learning independence?

It's very strange, isn't it? Some people just don't seem to understand the issue here.

I travelled unaccompanied minor from 5 onwards. It was great, I enjoyed it. If the child isn’t concerned and wants to go to camp I see absolutely no problem.

those suggesting it’s tantamount to child abandonment have clearly never done it. It’s the most mis-labelled thing ever, children are accompanied all the way and never left alone. Yes, they sit on the plane alone (next to other children or families if things haven’t changed), but with frequent checks. If a child is confident at school there is no problem.

Why were you travelling alone from the age of 5?

I think the flight would be totally fine, IF she is an experienced flier and IF she was flying home / to be with family.

It’s the holiday camp abroad I have issue with.

7 is the age that children have a sleepover for a night with a friend in the next town over.

No UK boarding schools take children younger than 8, and only a very few take them that young. Mostly it’s used for flexi boarding. Full time boarding at that age is super rare and even then it takes months once arrived to stop feeling homesick. The first week is the worst. There is a documentary on Youtube.

So I think your sister IBU.

The whole premise if totally unreasonable. Seven is too young for any and all of this.

There are always choices. They have had 3 months notice of this. Why can the parents take the 5 days and split them between them? Why can't they hire an emergency nanny so the child can be in familiar surroundings, they clearly have money? Have they tried asking her friend's parents if she can go to one of them? Have they tried being their own relatives and friend's? Have they asked KidsRUs?

Etc.

I expect she would be perfectly safe and well looked after. But I still wouldn't do it. Quite apart from the travel, I wouldn't send my 7-year-old to be on her own, with complete strangers, in another country for a week. What if she hated the camp? What if she got hurt or ill or upset about something? There are other considerations apart from the physical ones.

Most private schools break up earlier than state ones so I'd be surprised if there were no holiday clubs etc. on offer. Or your sister could hire a nanny for a week.

My parents divorced and one moved abroad, so for regular contact. I also spent time in holiday camps in both countries, loved every second of them and always asked to go. Fantastic fun.

The only way I can see very young children being ‘ok’ with this are the ones being brought up in emotionally distant families. I just can’t see a young child who is from a close, emotionally available family taking this in their stride. Most kids miss their mum (dad) after one night away and are glad to be back in their own home, even if they enjoyed the sleepover with friends. My kids would have been very distressed spending a week abroad with total strangers.

And @snowmichael they both grew up to be independent, capable adults without ever being UMs.

Absolute craziness to even consider this - poor child. She has a mum and a dad. They should have planned to have this week covered. They would have known from at least September!

Most people would be pretty horrified at the idea of sending a 7 year old to boarding school too. It's pretty rare now to be boarding before secondary school age.

At our junior school they did a 5 day residential trip in year 4 (so 8-9 year olds) and at least half didn't go as it was seen as too young. By year 6 nearly everyone went.

And that's a trip with all their friends, with familiar staff, completely supervised at all times on the journey.

Sorry haven't read the whole thread, but travelling at 7 UM is fine, Swissair are particularly Swiss !
I know the majority of people are against, but for my part, Its fine, particularly good for her French, she will be with others in exactly the same boat.
My kids did this, in reverse.... loved it

Who took you to the holiday camps?

Have you done the same with your kids?

My kids dad moved abroad for a few years, no way would I have put them on a plane at that age to go see him. It was his job to come here to see them.

It was different years ago, airlines didn’t need to be so competitive and could spare a flight assistant to keep an eye on you for most of the time. You were also being met by someone you knew at the other end.
I would say no way. 7 is very young.

PGL are from 8 upwards and don’t run camps at Xmas. You can send a just turned 8yo on a week long camp at other times of year though.

Travelling on a plane at 7 alone isn’t super unusual. Unless things have changed about 12 years ago I used fly from UK / Dubai regularly and there were always younger kids unaccompanied. 6/7 was probably the bottom end I saw but the staff were well trained. Military kids going to and from boarding schools from age of 7 will do this so it’s not hugely unusual. A flight from UK to Switzerland is a much shorter flight as well. I really don’t think there is any issue with this at all.

The residential overseas is a bit more eye raising. If she she has done residential in the UK that’s been one outside of schools without peers I can seen the natural jump but a 7 year old going in a flight first time solo then a week with strangers? Even if it’s the most well set up and well respected company, it’s going to be a bit hard on a 7 year old. I’m sure she’ll have fun but her mum needs to understand the range of emotions that kid is likely to go though.

I might consider it at 9 or 10, for a particularly robust, confident child who makes friends easily and isn’t bothered about new environments. I can imagine dd loving it.

At 7? No. It’s too much.

A pp said that the 7 year olds who do these Swiss camps will most likely be with older siblings or friends; I suspect they are right.

I have family in Europe whose kids are given greater freedoms than here. Independence encouraged from a young age, in full time daycare from three months old (heavily subsidised because it’s the norm), free roaming and playing out in their local streets and walking to school unaccompanied very young, etc etc. They wouldn’t send a 7 year old off to a foreign holiday camp on their own though! Not a chance.

She might be in the German part?