Flying as an unaccompanied minor at age 7

[CrispyClo]

I’m posting on behalf of my sister as she is looking for some external views on the matter.

My niece is 7, birthday was in August. She started a new school in September, which closes for Christmas a week earlier than most state schools. There don’t seem to be a lot of options for childcare during that week as not many schools here close that early so there aren’t any holiday camps.
My sister has booked my niece onto a week long camp abroad for the week. The camp is well reviewed and offers a pick up service for children flying as an unaccompanied minor. My sister initially felt this was a good idea, and booked it.
Now she is having some concerns and is unsure it’s the right choice, mainly as she appreciates 7 is quite young and while the flight isn’t particularly long, they don’t actually have someone sat with them, just cabin crew checking in. She has admitted herself she was fine with it until other people seemed to think it was a reckless parenting choice. I think it will be fine, my sister and I flew as unaccompanied minors often as our dad lived abroad, we were a bit older (maybe 10 the first time) but managed it fine.

AIBU to think my niece will be fine? She’s looking forward to the camp and doesn’t seem phased by the thought of it.

i can understand needing to be able to send a child unaccompanied on a flight, lives are complicated sometimes. I totally completely cannot understand sending a 7yo to an abroad camp for a week. I have a 7yo and no way!! They don’t even do school camp until they are about 9 and it’s one night until years 5 & 6. Because it’s a lot for little kids to stay away from home and not know their parents are there for them!!

Because they are probably rich, detached from reality, and were themselves raised in this way and therefore think it’s fine.
poor child!
I wouldn’t even let my 10 year old do this, nor would she want to!

How desperate is your sister to not look after her child if she's willing to do this

what's wrong with an agency nanny for a week

why does it have to be a camp

i bet I could find you a camp with 50 miles in about a 10 minutes

i call click bait

I’m someone who has travelled a lot in my life, including stints living abroad, and I’m a parent who feels very strongly about my children having those sort of freedoms and adventures.

I would have no concerns sending a child to a camp abroad for a week or letting them use an unaccompanied minors service.

But 7 is far far too young for this. You only need one thing to go wrong on the flight or the camp, and she would be terrified. And because she’s young the “going wrong” doesn’t have to be desperately serious in adult terms for it to be really scary for a child.

Even if she’s only going to Switzerland, and even assuming your sister is reasonably wealthy, it would probably take 12 hours for a parent to get there if she broke her arm by the time they’ve gone home from work to get a passport, booked tickets, got a taxi to the airport, waited for flight etc etc, That would mean her doing all of the medical care etc by herself in a foreign country with a stranger adult.

Much more appropriate for an 11 year old.

Not wanting your 7 year old to fly unaccompanied to another country to be looked after by strangers is not wrapping your child in cotton wool, it’s called responsible parenting and loving your child.

The fact a 7 year old is ok with this is, I think, a matter of concern in itself regarding the parent/child parental bond.

Serioudly, what is this person thinking.

DD went to a PGL camp at 8, in the UK, 1.5 hours drive from home, with her brother age 11 and his two friends.

We took them there and collected them.

There is no way on earth I’d do what you’re suggesting. If this is true and the parents have that amount of money to throw on childcare there must be local options such as a nanny or student teacher or nurse who would be happy to earn some cash.

I wouldn’t. It’s a disproportionate response to the problem imo. I see similar camps advertised on a group I’m part of - Russian-speaking mums in London, with camps advertised in Europe for age 8+ - and I cannot understand the takeup.

I flew unaccompanied at 13, commonwealth country to NYC. The staff who should have come along to escort me didn’t, so I made my way off the plane, through immigration and out of JFK Airport. It was fine (just), but I was five years older and in a country that spoke the same language.

I did it’s of summer camps as a kid, from as early as 7. I also flew as an unaccompanied minor from about 10. There is no way I’d send my child abroad for a camp at 7.

it’s all been covered by PPs but for me it illustrated that I needed to be independent as young as possible and that there was no one to talk to when I was worried or scared. There’s obviously so much more behind it all, and my family was very complicated, so this was just the tip of the iceberg. Therapy has helped me sort all that out. Please ask your sister to find an alternative.

The flight is fine, it’s a good service. I wouldn’t be so keen on the camp, but it depends on the DC. Is She looking forwards to it?

can your niece speak the local language? Hard no from me!

I wonder if this is actually the OP’s child?

I think it’s quite sad really. How good and essential can this camp be? (Unless military parents etc). Though if a parent is even thinking of the camp, then perhaps that says everything about the parent-child relationship and the camp is just a symptom of that 😐

And the social classes where boarding school af 7 was normal were notoriously well-adjusted!

You might get more positive responses on the Boarding School board

I have a nearly 7 year old and the thought of him doing this is absolutely insane, I would never ever do it!!

I think “camp” in that meaning is really very less familiar in the UK where I think a majority of posters are from. It has always seemed an American idea to me, I’ve never heard of any such camp only heard of it in American films or TV. I would also agree seven is unlikely to be mature enough for the whole experience but you know the child better than random people on the internet…

A 7-year old child? Not a chance! I wouldn’t be sending a child that young to a holiday camp for a week either.

I would never do this with a 7yo!
I would also never send a child so young to boarding school

Absolutely fucking not. What a crazy irresponsible idea.

Perhaps I am being to mean to say this next part - but since you are perfectly fine and see no issues with your 7 year old niece doing this - I hope you don't have children OP

The unaccompanied plane trip doesn’t worry me. DSD used to do this long haul between mum and dad aged 7. A hostess takes them off you at departures and they are walked through to arrivals the other end. The only issue seemed to be if she was stuck next to a child she didn’t like.

I think the camp idea depends. Way to convey the message you are inconvenient but mostly too much upheaval for a 7 year old after being away at school. Is there any time with mum between school and camp ?

Just turned 7? No flipping way!!

Middle (and upper) classes. OP and her DSis did this as kids so it’s considered normal in their world. The DC will be super independent by the age of 10!

Does it really matter what anyone else thinks OP?

The flight is ok IMO. My DS flew as an unaccompanied minor once around age 10, and it was not a problem at all. However I wouldn't send my 7 year old on a flight to go to camp with strangers for a week and not even hand her over myself. I know it's normal in some wealthy families across Europe to send your kids away for weeks on end but it feels like too much - she's too young, it's too long and she's got to fly there and back without a parent. Too much at once.

I cannot tell you how much my 7 nearly 8 yr old would hate this. He’d be absolutely terrified for the flight and then miserable for the camp. Aside from the safely issues (random cabin crew and airline staff aren’t good people to be in charge of a child in a dangerous/ crowded place) the fact that I know that he, and every other 7 yr old I know would be utterly miserable would do it for me.

I’ve got quite a few friends from different nationalities and no one I know would think this is normal either.

What 99% of working parents do is find a club near to home that kids can attend, ideally with some school friends and, if necessary, massage their working hours to fit in. Or they use family/ friends a nanny.

There are very well run international winter sport camps in purpose built centres in Switzerland for children aged 6+. One I know of has been running for 40 years. It's not for everyone, but I can imagine that a confident, bilingual 7 year old that enjoys skiing would love the chance to go.

My DC's have grown up in Switzerland and did residential trips for sports clubs/school from age 6. They wouldn't have wanted to go away without friends though, but it really depends on the child.

Absolutely not. The thought of sending a 7 year old on a plane alone makes me feel really sad! The last time we went on a flight my child of a similar age got terribly sore ears on landing and was crying... imagine if we hadn't been there to comfort them and they just had to deal with that alone? I also think going away for a week at that age when she's (presumably) not used to it is a lot for a child that age.

I have seen unaccompanied minors on planes. They do seem well looked after and there is an established process to make sure they are safe.

I did see a young child of that age on a flight, however, they had an older sibling, maybe 10/11, with them.

I think a 7 year old, by themselves is too young.

@CrispyClo why does your DSis think sending her 7YO DC abroad for a week, by themselves, is the best option?
Can't the parents take time off work?
Can't they tag team to ensure childcare is covered?
Do they have any family members that could help?
Could any other families with DC at the same school help?
If there are literally no options from people that they know, why not hire a temporary nanny?
There are tonnes of options I would look at before booking a week's camp abroad.

@CrispyClo it would be interesting if you could post the link of the camp. Also to know a brief family background - did you and your DSis go to boarding school abroad at a young age which is why you think this is totally normal?